Here is how I relate to / don't relate to the types. I think I'm most likely a 5, 6, or a 9. Those are the types that most often people will type me as. I'm really confused right now because people are giving contradictory explanations and opinions. I've read alot about the enneagram and studied it for awhile, but I keep going back and forth between types. I had typed myself as a 5, then as a 6 and now I'm seriously considering type 9. I'm also open to other possibilities as well like 1 or 4. I think 2, 3, 7, 8 are probably not as likely.
TYPE 1: I think this was more prevalent when I was younger. When I was younger, I was quite rigid about how things should be done and following the rules. Now I’ve loosened up about this alot. I am a perfectionist about some things, but I can be rather careless about other things. For example, my books might be lined up neatly and in order but the clothes are not perfectly folded. I have a very strong sense of fairness and justice and strong principles that I live by. It can be difficult to just let things be when I see that my sense of justice or principles are being violated. I try hard to avoid mistakes but I don’t think I am the sort that avoids mistakes at all costs. Many of my standards of perfection are more external than internal- doing it a certain way because it meets their expectations. Sometimes I’ll put more effort into something than is necessary. Some of this is due to my own self-imposed standards, but much of this is due to wanting to avoid criticism by others. If I’m not clear what the expectations are, I tend to overestimate them. I generally see anger as the enemy, work very hard to control and feel guilty when I’ve lost control.
TYPE 2: Overall I don’t relate all that much to this type, but I do relate to the part about wanting others love and approval and being afraid of rejection. However, if I am going to be honest, I don’t like helping others all that much. I often find it to be an imposition on my time and energy. I’m still helpful though when I need to be. Reasons being that I feel guilty if I’m not doing my part to help, and if someone really needs my help and if the relationship with that person is important to me, than I often help rather than risk the relationship. I’m typically more introverted than 2s are, I don’t initiate all that many relationships, I’m not seductive or manipulative in the way 2s are. I certainly want people to like me but I don’t typically go near as far in making this happen as a 2 would.
TYPE 3: I am often comparing myself to other people regarding achievements and success in life. I work hard to achieve my goals and always have some plan or goal in my mind on how to better myself. I am image oriented, I try to be what I perceive others want me to be. However, this is only up to a point. I can only fake it somewhat, if it goes too much against who I am I can’t do it. I’m also lousy at self-promoting and tooting my own horn. Instead I quietly work hard, and better myself and hope others will notice and appreciate that. I tend to be too modest sometimes. I’m a hard worker, but I’m not a workaholic, I don’t live for my work, I also want to enjoy life.
TYPE 4: I am very introspective, sensitive, and feel things deeply and intensely. I am quite melancholy and can easily feel sad and depressed. I often think about things from the past, often with a sense of longing for things to be the way they used to be. I have a very hard time letting go of any past hurts or injustices done to me. Envy is a big problem in my life- I often feel like others are more ‘special’ or ‘significant’ than me. I want to stand out and be unique yet I’m also afraid of it. Afraid to be scorned and not truly accepted for who I am. I value authenticity yet I often do things that go against that because I care too much about meeting the expectations of other people. I love art and greatly appreciate it, but I’m not really the creative type. I don’t feel compelled to create my own works of art, just enjoy what’s out there.
TYPE 5: I need alot of privacy and alone time as I often feel pressured by the needs and expectations of others, like I’m having to spend my time and energy where I don’t want to spend it. I think about things alot, I like researching information, understanding things thoroughly. I like to come into situations prepared with sufficient information, I don’t like being caught off guard. I love feeling like I’m really knowledgeable about something, being an expert in a certain area. I’m often praised for my knowledge on things. One thing that I don’t relate to is that fives are typically detached from their emotions. For me, emotions are very significant, I am very aware of them, hypersensitive to them. It’s difficult to just completely detach from the emotional component. Usually I’m quite objective about things but sometimes this is difficult when I feel really strongly about something.
TYPE 6: Anxiety and doubt are prevalent in my life, and this is noticeable by others. I have a strong drive for security, I am very reliable, loyal, and trustworthy. One of the most hurtful things for me is when someone betrays me or breaks my trust. I seek certainty yet never feel like I can attain it, because there’s always another angle to consider, always more what ifs. I am not exactly paranoid as is often described with type 6. However, I am always wondering what people are thinking of me, and what impressions they have and often worry I’m making a poor impression. Regarding trust, I tend to be mostly trusting of people, but at the same time I’m quite skeptical if they do something to break that trust, I can lose it for good. Although I can give them a second chance if they are truly sorry for what they did and make a convincing case to better themselves. I often anticipate various scenarios in my head and try to plan accordingly. Sometimes these are worst case scenarios, but these are also balanced by best case scenarios. Overall I don’t think I do the worst case scenario thing that much but sometimes it happens.
TYPE 7: I’m not that much like this type. I mean I do enjoy fun and variety in life, but I don’t see this as a way of avoiding pain like a typical 7 would. I do things because they are interesting in themselves. I hate pain, but I don’t deny it’s presence either. I am open to different ways of doing things, I like to try out new things, but sometimes this in more in my own head than actually being out there in the world. I’m more idle typically, more cautious than adventurous, although I am open to new experiences. I just need a convincing case that it’s safe to do so. I do have a childlike sense of wonder and enthusiasm for many things and often have multiple projects I’m working on in various stages. I have the natural tendency to start more things than I can realistically finish.
TYPE 8: This is the least likely type for me, I think. I am not typically an aggressive type, I dislike anger, see it as the enemy and avoid it if I can. I am also easily intimidated by overly aggressive people. I am generally more doubting than I am confident. I am not the tough type, I am more thin skinned and soft hearted, although I do have occasional moments where I can display toughness as needed, but I cannot sustain this over a long term. I am insecure and vulnerable and not afraid to show that. I’m generally more of a follower than a leader, but I am also willing to take charge if I feel competent enough or when no one else is, and actually I do a pretty good job at it. I also stand up against injustices that I see and protect those I see as more vulnerable.
TYPE 9: I hate conflict and I try to avoid it if I can. Too much conflict and disharmony can literally make me sick. However, I realize some conflict is inevitable and I can stand up for myself when needed- such as when I’m being disrespected. I also dislike struggle and strife and any inconvenience. I am easygoing and accepting about most things- I often find that people are too angry or judgemental about things that don’t matter much in the whole scheme of things. I find it difficult to deal with people that are more disagreeable or aggressive. I think I’m more calm on the outside than I am on the inside, where I’m far more intense. Sometimes I act like things don’t matter that much when I know that deep down they really do. I often put other peoples’ wishes ahead of my own to avoid conflict and because at the time they seem more important but I am still well aware of what I want for myself. I often come across kind, pleasant, considerate, and rather passive to other people. I can be prone to procrastination, and indecision about things. However, I don’t sweep problems under the rug or deny them, I may put things off to ponder them some more but if something needs to get solved soon it will get solved. I also don’t think things necessarily just work themselves out for the best.