Personality Cafe banner

1 - 14 of 14 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
122 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
Ive read that "the bear" 8w9 takes more of a defensive stand and if a fight is started they will gladly step in and finish it. This hits home to me as I have had to finish fights many times in my life, alot of them physically but I never go looking for fights and go on the offense unless its necessary or im in a bad or unhealthy mood. Sometimes its as if im daring anyone around me to show the slightest hint of disrespect so I can confront them. Its as if I try to appear weak sometimes just so I can do a 180 and really strike fear in someone. Its as if a cheetah were chasing a gazelle and as the cheetah was about to attack the gazelle turned into well... A bear. Hope Im not rambling I would just like to hear opinions on this behaviour. Have any 8w9s found better ways of maybe going on the offense in a healthy way?
 

·
fire breathing dragon
Joined
·
2,810 Posts
Ahem...note the cheetah avatar, Lol.


I'm not an 8, but I think I'm close enough, and even if Im not I'll give you the CP6 answer anyway.

From what I understand about 8's, they aren't really aware of any brewing trouble that could result in an altercation until the moment arises and they have to crush it. The 8w9 is often described as a castle with thick walls and only when someone attempts to break down those walls does the 8w9 strike back.

Im more of a guard in a watchtower. I notice something odd far off into the distance and under the cloak of darkness I go to investigate it. Once I've isolated the target I must come up with ways to destroy it before it gets to my territory. I could either a) come up with a plan to defeat it and set a trap for it to fall into before it can get to me or b) infiltrate it and destroy it from the inside before it even has a chance to think about coming to attack me.


From my perspective, 8s seem to not notice/care about their vulnerabilities until its too late. Which, probably isn't a problem most of the time, but if you're going to be getting into fights when the shit gets brought to your door step, it can turn into a big one. Especially if you really hurt someone in the process of fighting. I dont know about you but I wouldnt want to deal with that (the law I mean).

I would suggest you just become more aware. More aware of yourself, more aware of your surrounding, and more aware of other people. Most people are snakes in the grass. They are cowards that will try to sneak up on you, even if you can and do beat them. I never forget that.

I would say don't always sit on the defensive side. Sometimes you have to be offensive. Learn to oscillate between the two. Sometimes I'll preemptively strike, and sometimes I won't. There are too many factors involved to explain when I will and when I wont but you get it.

Oscillating is something that CP6s do pretty well IMO.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
17,781 Posts
Ive read that "the bear" 8w9 takes more of a defensive stand and if a fight is started they will gladly step in and finish it. This hits home to me as I have had to finish fights many times in my life, alot of them physically but I never go looking for fights and go on the offense unless its necessary or im in a bad or unhealthy mood. Sometimes its as if im daring anyone around me to show the slightest hint of disrespect so I can confront them. Its as if I try to appear weak sometimes just so I can do a 180 and really strike fear in someone. Its as if a cheetah were chasing a gazelle and as the cheetah was about to attack the gazelle turned into well... A bear. Hope Im not rambling I would just like to hear opinions on this behaviour. Have any 8w9s found better ways of maybe going on the offense in a healthy way?
I'm not an 8 either, but I don't think this question is type related.
- just tell them "please stop doing that" and offer a short explanation as to why the behavior is disturbing you. most men have a tendency to "let the little things slide" and then suddenly become aggressive after things build up, but it's better to bring up potential problem areas early in the game. it's like training a puppy, the goal is to punish it immediately (but not too harshly) when it starts chewing up your couch, not 5 days later.
- other than that, you also seem like you're looking for an outlet for your natural competitiveness/high intensity, for which I would recommend some form of martial arts or intense contact sports if you aren't involved in either already.
- pretending to be weaker so that other people view you as a target and attack you is not going to satisfy you. you are an 8, you want strong opponents. this method will only get you into fights with a bunch on insecure bullies who pick on others who are weaker than them.
- why not go for less people oriented challenges like advancing your financial position? I guarantee you that will be a much more satisfying challenge than waiting for insecure losers to pick a fight with you
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
122 Posts
Discussion Starter #4
I just couldnt let them know anything was bothering me because in my eyes they have won once they kno they got to me whether that was the intention or not and I couldnt allow that. Instead I play it off as no big deal because I know if push came to shove I can handle myself. Eventually though enough of me playing things off as no big deal becomes a big deal. It also could be many small things not even people related. Theres a certain point of no return when someone has been disrespectful and something just clicks when I am full force and will not stop until I find them and put an end to it by this point though all negotiations are irrelevant because im out for blood. Anger completely consumes me. Anyway I do agree about channeling my aggression into a sport or something. I just wish I had the time I guess I will just make time.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
17,781 Posts
I just couldnt let them know anything was bothering me because in my eyes they have won once they kno they got to me whether that was the intention or not and I couldnt allow that. Instead I play it off as no big deal because I know if push came to shove I can handle myself. Eventually though enough of me playing things off as no big deal becomes a big deal. It also could be many small things not even people related.
letting someone know that they are bothering/inconveniencing them is not "letting them win". if you clearly and firmly establish your boundaries, the best option is either
a) leave them. they don't respect you and people who don't respect you are not worth your time.
b) you wanted an opportunity for conflict? if they have continued to disrespect your boundaries, knowing full well what they are doing, there's your opportunity right there.

Theres a certain point of no return when someone has been disrespectful and something just clicks when I am full force and will not stop until I find them and put an end to it by this point though all negotiations are irrelevant because im out for blood. Anger completely consumes me. Anyway I do agree about channeling my aggression into a sport or something. I just wish I had the time I guess I will just make time.
this is exactly the problem. does the person even know they were hurting/disrespecting you in the first place? I've had a lot of people suddenly explode on me for things I did for months, only because they never told me anything was wrong. I am not one of those people who is constantly looking back asking "am I doing something wrong?" or "am I bothering anyone" so if I am doing these things I appreciate it when people tell me as soon as possible.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
122 Posts
Discussion Starter #6
Oh yes they definately knew before it became physical I had confronted them face to face twice and warned them to stop. That jusr fizzled and they kept on my next step was the physical one which I had clearly said I was going to do if it had persisted. I will warn people thay what they are doing I do not aopreciate and give them a clear response as to how I will take things to the next level if they persist. Some people just seem hellbent on ruining my good juju.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
17,781 Posts
Oh yes they definately knew before it became physical I had confronted them face to face twice and warned them to stop. That jusr fizzled and they kept on my next step was the physical one which I had clearly said I was going to do if it had persisted. I will warn people thay what they are doing I do not aopreciate and give them a clear response as to how I will take things to the next level if they persist. Some people just seem hellbent on ruining my good juju.
if these people are your friends, I suggest getting new ones. if they are your coworkers or someone you don't have a choice being around, that's more complicated.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,059 Posts
Have any 8w9s found better ways of maybe going on the offense in a healthy way?
As far as defense...

For me it's like I'm not really a "violent" person. I certainly don't go around starting fights. At worst, I lose my temper once and a while (due to bottling it up).

However, part of me dares anyone to try to mess with my puppy. I can't imagine what it will be like if I ever have children. You know that politician who picks up babies and kisses them?

Don't touch my baby. Thanks. ;)

As far as offense is concerned...

Martin Luther King was an 8w9 sx/so. Non-violent resistance is an effective offensive strategy.
Depends on what you're trying to do, I suppose.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
17,781 Posts
As far as defense...

For me it's like I'm not really a "violent" person. I certainly don't go around starting fights. At worst, I lose my temper once and a while (due to bottling it up).

However, part of me dares anyone to try to mess with my puppy. I can't imagine what it will be like if I ever have children. You know that politician who picks up babies and kisses them?

Don't touch my baby. Thanks. ;)

As far as offense is concerned...

Martin Luther King was an 8w9 sx/so. Non-violent resistance is an effective offensive strategy.
Depends on what you're trying to do, I suppose.
sometimes. other times, no
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
4,265 Posts
if you're an INTP my first guess would be that you're a 5. 5's can disintegrate to become 7's (when stressed out), and integrate to become 8's (when having a great day). As such you can display tendencies of both. Idunno if you're an 8 or not, just something to consider.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
606 Posts
Sorry this is slightly off, but I was wondering if you type 8s have tendencies to feel like you're gonna do something violent ever. And more related, do you guys feel the need to show power over others, beat them in battle, physically I mean.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
2,458 Posts
Have any 8w9s found better ways of maybe going on the offense in a healthy way?
I find one on one conflicts petty, unsatisfying, and a waste of time.

I channel my aggression through competition. Be it video games, competitive sports, strategy games, academic success, influence of people, list goes on. Creating a challenge and surmounting it, becoming king of the hill, I find much more satisfying than landing myself in a petty fight with an unhealthy nobody.
 
1 - 14 of 14 Posts
Top