People might be awkward around your tears because they're feeling judged - not because they're judging you. In any situation like this, those who don't react in such a way as to express their grief openly - because they are more withdrawn or because they feel more shock than grief, or a need to distance or minimise, or a need to understand, or any number of normal human reactions other than straight grief - can sometimes feel like those who are expressing emotion think less of them for not crying (which is not always wrong). They feel awkward, almost like they should feel more, believing the crying person thinks themself a better, more compassionate human being merely because they can express themselves that way. There is a pressure and a paranoia and an uncertainty of social convention - people try not to feel bad, try to minimise and to cope -- and someone who is visibly upset makes everyone else feel like an asshole simply for having a different coping strategy: so they try to avoid them, try to cheer them up, et cetera. Although this is not the fault of the person who is crying (indeed, it is no one's fault), it does create an awkward dynamic sometimes. Perhaps that is more what happened.
There's nothing wrong with your reaction. But theirs just sounds like...coping. Trying to. Differently. Someone just died - you can cut everyone some slack, surely.
There's nothing wrong with your reaction. But theirs just sounds like...coping. Trying to. Differently. Someone just died - you can cut everyone some slack, surely.
