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Damn, this thread is where it's at. I mean, fuck all those long paragraphs on Wikisocion, right? :cool:

Se: You love to beat people up, and you also play football. You are obsessed with power, and constantly threaten to pop a cap in someone's ass. You rape lots of people, and commit felonies every day.Fi: You're a moralistic prude, and love to beat people with Bibles. You live in a red state, and probably voted for George Bush because of his "family values." You are also really clingy, and hate friendly people.
You know what this makes me think of? The sort of mean playground bully who has a tiny gang and everything, the guy everyone thinks is rude and unapproachable but also kinda stupid. But then you find out later that he actually has a soft, fluffy heart of gold and thinks about deep and philosophical things when he's done beating up people, and actually just wants to find someone to appreciate him.

Napoleon (Nap, Napka, SEE, ESFp)

Absolutely uncontrollable giant creatures of dim-witted punching force. Constantly trying to prove to everyone else that they are cooler, smarter, have larger salaries, and that, all in all, their member is longer and thicker.

In virtual space, this type is represented mainly by the female sex. Part of this effect is due to the fact that Napoleon men almost always type themselves into Zhukovs (SLEs).

Part of socionic community (in which one may occasionally find their duals - Balzacs) treats them with admiration for their ability to get out and pull anyone else out of any crappy situation, and for their absolutely unwavering and constant optimism and readiness to act.

The rest they manage to provoke with their self-aggrandizing stupidity, inescapable desire to make themselves a cog in each barrel without vaseline, impositions on everyone of their exclusive knowledge of life, and never fading demonstrations of own superiority.

The forums Napoleons in equal proportions belaud their duals Balzacs and ask advice on how to deal with their horridness. And when opportunity presents itself, they will gladly attempt to demonstrate their sharp wit and their deep knowledge of life.
Yeeeah. This has absolutely evaporated any and every doubt about my type.

...anyway, in all seriousness, I think this stuff is cool because sometimes it's in gross exaggerations that you can find weird truths about yourself. Descriptions that aren't too predictive of behavior sometimes can leave people confused because they can all be relatable to an extent.
 
No this is the best thing, everyone else can go home

Why do I find this so funny, there's tears in my eyes, oh my god
 
I just died because Hilarious. Someone come up with something funnier for ESI LIE conversation. I can't think of it myself because I'm Ne polr. Ican't think.
Wait i got one.
ESI: I hate everything but love you. Can i do your chores?
LIE: no
ESI: I hate you
LIE: don't care
sex
 
I just died because Hilarious. Someone come up with something funnier for ESI LIE conversation. I can't think of it myself because I'm Ne polr. Ican't think.
Wait i got one.
ESI: I hate everything but love you. Can i do your chores?
LIE: no
ESI: I hate you
LIE: don't care
sex
I'd say it like this:

ESI: I hate everything because it's evil, but I...<silence>... can do your chores?
LIE: No.
ESI: You're evil. I hate you!
LIE: Don't care. Have some cold hard money...
(hate/anger sex)

:tongue:
 
I'd say it like this:

ESI: I hate everything because it's evil, but I...<silence>... can do your chores?
LIE: No.
ESI: You're evil. I hate you!
LIE: Don't care. Have some cold hard money...
(hate/anger sex)

:tongue:
yes! thats better.

edited: i know this thread is a joke but the stereotype of Te being about money, well its so untrue that its not funny unfortunately. True is funny. Other dual dyads are more likely to behave that way.
Truth is i'm extremely independent and rather starve then be dependent on someone else. ESI's don't like putting anyone out of their way and that includes taking care of itself.
Sorry to shit on this parade btw.
 
ESI: bla bla blee.. evil sadness, oh
LIE: Tell me everything you hate, it makes me feel good cuz you love me
ESI: tell me how to do stuff
LIE: okay, do my dishes please
ESI: sex required
LIE: if you must

This is just as silly but XD
someone refine this
 
SLE/IEI:
IEI: I am sitting on this couch, slitting my wrists. I need someone to punish me like the naughty teenager I am. Spank me! I've been bad!
SLE: Yo muthafucka, SLE's IN DA HOOD YO! Bend ova, bitch, cuz I'm gonna snap a whip on yo ass if you don't BE-HAVE. Oh, and while we're at dis, can you help me restore my rep after I kick everyone's azz? Ho, I need ya to tell me I'm awesome.
IEI: *slap* Ahhh, harder! *smack* I'll help you after you're done raping me! Don't stop!
Can't argue with that. ESTP friend literally threatens violence when I'm being silly, and it usually makes me laugh and calm down. Though he's more prone to the word "broad."
 
LIE: Money. Facts. Capitalism. Financial security. Office meetings. Efficiency. More boring corporate shit. Help, I can't relate to people, because no one gives a shit about any of the neat things I listed above.
EII: Yes, I will make you brownies. Since you are my masculine provider, I feel the need to service you like a good wife should. I'll also help you get over your fear of being less than an hour early to your next office meeting.
LIE: Thanks, I was getting worried there for a second that I'd be alone for the rest of my life. Now I know that someone cares about me, even if they really only care about my paycheck. Nice!

Fixed for science.
The NSA must have been listening to my private conversations.
I'll make sure to bake them into brownies once my LIE disposes of the bodies.
 
LIE: Money. Facts. Capitalism. Financial security. Office meetings. Efficiency. More boring corporate shit. Help, I can't relate to people, because no one gives a shit about any of the neat things I listed above.
EII: Yes, I will make you brownies. Since you are my masculine provider, I feel the need to service you like a good wife should. I'll also help you get over your fear of being less than an hour early to your next office meeting.
LIE: Thanks, I was getting worried there for a second that I'd be alone for the rest of my life. Now I know that someone cares about me, even if they really only care about my paycheck. Nice!

Fixed for science.
The NSA must have been listening to my private conversations.
I'll make sure to bake them into brownies once my LIE disposes of the bodies.
Meanwhile, IEI with LIE..

IEI: I'm sad and don't want to be. Could you threaten me with violence?
LIE: Sure! I can provide anything for y--wait, violence? .. I .. Sure! I can impose my will and meet any objective! And enjoy that you want to be submissive to me!
IEI: You're doing it wrong! You're supposed to mean it but not really!
LIE: That doesn't make sense. I'm just going to go back to earning money for you, that'll make you happy. Brownies?
IEI: Brownies?? What do you think I am?? How dare you! .. But yes, I can do that.

Not funny in my attempt to capture it, tragically funny to experience.
 
Recopied from somewhere else.

Story about a cake and interaction of all eight functions between IEE (Huxley) and SLI (Gabin).
As a precondition, there's a steaming pie on the table.


SLI *Si base* I've made a cake.
IEE *Ne base* Oooh! Cake! Yum-yum! Browny warmy steaming cake! I should taste it!
SLI *Se limiting* No. *slaps IEE on the wrist*
IEE *Fi creative* But why???
SLI *Ni role* All in due time.
IEE *Ni limiting* Yea. I'll wait!
SLI *Se limiting* Hands off the pie!
IEE *Fi creative* Oh, God! There are children dying of hunger in Africa, and you can not give me a piece of cake?!
SLI *Te creative* If you want to help children in Africa, donate money for humanitarian aid. You won't have a cake.
IEE *Si suggestive* I can taste your cake so as to understand how to cook it!
SLI *Ne suggestive* It seems you are trying to trick me.
IEE *Se role* Give me the cake *snatches plate with a cake from SLI's hands*
SLI *Se limiting* *glares angrily*
IEE *let go off the plate, Fe demonstrative* Fine! Then I'll suffer!
SLI *Fe PoLR* Go ahead. Just do it somewhere away from me and the cake.
IEE *Si suggestive* Great. Then, I'll make a cake myself!
SLI *Ne suggestive* I sense troubles...
IEE *Ti PoLR* Well... right... food processor... it must be somewhere here... could you show me how it works? The manual is written in Chinese!
SLI *Ti demonstrative* It's in German. Look, it is very simple.
IEE *Fi creative* You're the lord of food processors!
SLI *Si base* That's the way it works.
IEE *Te activating/HA* We can establish a business of manuals adaptation, so as normal people could understand them!
SLI *Ni role* We can eat the cake in 10 minutes
IEE *Ni limiting* Is it time already?
SLI *Si base* I just see that the cake is almost cooled down.

IEE *Si suggestive* I will cut it!
SLI *Fi activating/HA* I wasn't against you eating a cake, it's just that warm dough is bad for the stomach. There would be more problems afterwards *Ne suggestive*
IEE *Ne base* I knew that you'd give it to me! I've been just playing for time, so you wouldn't kick me out of the kitchen!
SLI *Se limiting*:mad::mad::mad:
 
Meanwhile, IEI with LIE..

IEI: I'm sad and don't want to be. Could you threaten me with violence?
LIE: Sure! I can provide anything for y--wait, violence? .. I .. Sure! I can impose my will and meet any objective! And enjoy that you want to be submissive to me!
IEI: You're doing it wrong! You're supposed to mean it but not really!
LIE: That doesn't make sense. I'm just going to go back to earning money for you, that'll make you happy. Brownies?
IEI: Brownies?? What do you think I am?? How dare you! .. But yes, I can do that.

Not funny in my attempt to capture it, tragically funny to experience.
That's actually very close to the experience :blushed:
 
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