Personality Cafe banner
1 - 12 of 12 Posts

·
QUEEN PEEN
Joined
·
9,303 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I know that there are many of us here on PerC who struggle with depression and/or anxiety. I have a few tips that I would like to share with you. As someone who has struggled with depression and bouts of anxiety (mostly due to PTSD), I can honestly say that the tools and information I’m about to give you have changed my life for the better. I have grown so much through gaining this wisdom, and I hope these tools will encourage your growth as well. It is a daily struggle, but one that does get easier the more you implement these tools in your life.



Let’s start with the grand pattern, the basis for what I will be talking about:




Thoughts à Emotions à Moods à Behaviors





In essence, behaviors are a product of our moods, moods are a product of our emotions, and emotions are a product of our thoughts.

How do we understand our depressions and anxieties? We’re going to start backwards and work our way forward. That said, let’s talk about behaviors. We all know when our behaviors are changing in a negative manner. It becomes evident to us and those around us. What do we do to change those behaviors? We check into our overall mood. What kind of mood are we in? Well, usually, not a good one, lol. So we know we’re not in a good mood... grand :p Let’s figure out why by examining our emotions. How are we really feeling below the surface level mood? The most common answers… unmotivated, apathetic, tired, stressed out, worried, irritable, and the obvious… depressed and anxious. How do we overcome depression and anxiety? My answer: examine your thoughts! Before we get into discussing thoughts, we’re basically going to discuss facing our emotions and some things that may happen should we choose to ignore our emotions or stuff them.

Many of us really just do not like to face or deal with our emotions. They can be ugly, unpleasant, inconvenient, and at times, just generally not fun. If we do not properly face and deal with our emotions, things get a little more twisted for us. We suffer consequences! We may have less energy, lose our appetites or eat too much, and/or become easily taxed physically, mentally, and emotionally. When these things begin to happen to our bodies, that should be major indicator that something is clearly not right. Our bodies are trying to tell us, “Bro... broooooo! Something’s up here, dammit!” We need to pay attention! It is vital that we are aware of the messages our bodies send us.

If you are lacking sleep or have inadequate eating habits, those are also things you might want to deal with head on and straighten out. You would not believe how much those two things affect our moods and bodies in and of themselves. Sunlight, exercise, and meditation are also quite helpful in lifting your mood. <---extra tips!

Now, let’s talk thoughts, shall we? J Our thoughts are intangible, yet we believe in them. Why? We believe in them because we experience them and because they define the essence of who we are as individuals. This is actually the very foundation that has led us to explore these personality theories for which we all seem to share a passion. Different people means different ways of thinking. Our thoughts define us at our cores, and the impact they have on our existence is nothing short of fascinating! When we examine our thoughts in an attempt to understand our emotions, we should, above all else, keep an eye out for cognitive distortions—this is the main topic I would like to discuss.






 

·
QUEEN PEEN
Joined
·
9,303 Posts
Discussion Starter · #2 ·
What is a cognitive distortion? “Cognitive distortions are simply ways that our mind convinces us of something that isn’t really true. These inaccurate thoughts are usually used to reinforce negative thinking or emotions…”

Many people who experience depression and anxiety don’t realize that they’re feeding their minds with these cognitive distortions. Personally, I don’t always catch cognitive distortions right away. Sometimes, I get all the way to displaying piss poor behaviors(referring to the above model) before I realize that my emotions, mood, and behaviors are all based on a thought or thoughts that probably are not even true. It makes me feel foolish when I do realize it. In any case, I can say with confidence that this list has changed mylife. Weeding out my own cognitive distortions and being able to pin others’ words (spoken thoughts) to cognitive distortions has done WONDERS for my health. I am much healthier than I was just a few months ago, which is really something when one considers that I am now facing some of the biggest hardships I have ever had to face.

I would like to encourage everyone to read this list. Whether you’re a thinker or a feeler, a sensor or intuitive or whatever, I believe that being mindful ofc ognitive distortions can change your attitude towards life as well as your attitude toward yourself.

Here is a link with the list of the fifteen most commonly used cognitive distortions: http://psychcentral.com/lib/2009/15-common-cognitive-distortions/



I was introduced to this list in the middle of a group session during my stay at a mental health clinic this past year. I had admitted myself for suicidal thoughts. At that point in time, everything seemed to be going wrong--my mother was extremely ill, I was diagnosed with breast cancer, I could not focus on my job, etc. I had no direction in life, no real friends, was dealing with chronic back pain and the possibility of never being able to walk again—the list goes on. I remember sitting there and chuckling to myself as I read that list. Everything came together at that moment. It all made sense. I saw so much of myself in that list of cognitive distortions that it was ridiculous. It occurred to me—duh! What the hell have I been thinking all of this time? Shit… no wonder I’m so damn depressed! Upon reading that list, other people also came to mind. I thought about the things that others had said to try to bring me down or manipulate me, and realized that they were all big, fat lies. From that moment forward, I have been working hard to restore myself back to a position in which I can fulfill my greater potential. In a few short months, I have completely transformed myself thanks in large part to this list though there is still, and always will be, more room for growth. My friends, I beg you to cling to the wisdom to which I have clung. It has made life much easier to deal with and handle. All it took was the dedication and time to examine my thoughts and change them accordingly.

Like I said, you won’t catch yourself right away every time it happens. Even still, I sometimes forget that I have this useful tool as well as other useful tools to help me. In fact, I have not been on guard examining my thoughts for cognitive distortions at all this past month… the result? Well, just a couple of nights ago, @Khys and@Stephen were subject to witness a moment of pure and utter panic on my part. I had let my mind get carried away with worries and cognitive distortions that literally drove my state of mental health into the ground. I will say this though… if you get to the panic point, talk to someone. Don’t worry about how you might be perceived, just give yourself time to get your emotions out. Once you’re done expressing your emotions and frustrations, formulate a plan. It doesn’t have to be long-term. Focus on one goal at a time if you have to. From what I’ve learned from observing myself, most episodes like this can be avoided if you examine what is going through your mind. Try to stop it before it even gets started. If you fail, just like I have in this past month, don’t beat yourself up. Just pick up where you left off, implement these tools back into your life, and get on with it ;)


Review:



I realize that I did not discuss some things as in depth as I would have liked; therefore, I’m going to make you a review list to help summarize what you can do to help yourself.



Things that can help you overcome depression and anxiety:


1. Adequate sleep

2. Adequate food intake

3. Meditation, sunlight, exercise

4. Plans and schedules

5. Cognitive examination and accountability

6. Person-to-person interaction (friends, therapy, etc.)



In summary, one of the healthiest things you could do for yourself is to strive to keep control of your thoughts. Try not to let your thoughts run away with themselves to the point that your emotions, moods, and behaviors are impacting you and those around you in a negative manner. Everyone is striving for happiness. It is my firm belief that happiness is a mindset, not a destination. We would do well to realize that happiness can be achieved as long as we are paving that pathway with good thinking. Another point that I feel the need to make is that we only have control over ourselves and our own thoughts. We cannot control what other people do or say, but we can control how we think and react to others. That much is up to us. Be the best you that you can be. There is always room for us to grow. Never stop growing!



Disclaimer: I realize that I did not suggest medication. I am not against medication, but I honestly believe that the majority of depression and anxiety cases can be nurtured down to a very minimal and almost nonexistent level if the tools given here are implemented daily. From observing my own behaviors, the only times I slipped back into my depression were when I stopped implementing all of these tools. I thought I was all better and that I didn’t have to use them anymore… wrong! It’s a life change, and a damn good one J Medication is for some people, but probably not the majority, in my opinion.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,783 Posts
@Ace Face

Thanx so much for your honesty and for posting the breakdowns. Very insightful.

Since you have been honest, I will be honest. I can't really relate to the Depression/Anxiety angle, but alot of those tips can be applied to someone that has addictions. I had a nasty gambling habit at one time and I had to develop certain.....thoughts, strategies, and practices to break it. It took awhile, and it's still kind of there, buried I guess, like all problems one must face and constantly fight. But I'm free now and have been for awhile. First thing was to be objective about it and what it was doing to my life vs, the thrill, the rush, the adrenaline, the chase. I had to focus on the reality of what it was doing and what it had done. And try to understand why I was addicted to those 'feelings' I received from gambling. I had to cut ties with alot of friends, as I was a very social gambler. I had to move, yes move from where I was at(Minneapolis to Seattle). And I had to employ many other changes.....

Well, now i'm rambling, but i really appreciate this thread and can relate to it in certain ways. Thanx.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,411 Posts
Thanks, although I'm not depressed I think I can see this in others and even myself sometimes.

I guess this also explains why INFPs are likely to get depressed: introverts having less interaction, feelers letting things get to them more easily, and N without a meaningful goal starts speculating on different ways things can go to hell - better be grounded in real life with S in that situation. Also P, having more difficulty sticking with a plan.

I suspect if anything is more important than the other points it is that about making plans. Striving for a goal, even as banal as making dinner or cleaning up your place will get you some momentum. It's when you're standing still that those cognitive distortions seem to kick in.
 

·
QUEEN PEEN
Joined
·
9,303 Posts
Discussion Starter · #6 ·
I suspect if anything is more important than the other points it is that about making plans. Striving for a goal, even as banal as making dinner or cleaning up your place will get you some momentum. It's when you're standing still that those cognitive distortions seem to kick in.
This completely! It is so vital to devise one plan at a time just to get yourself started :) Even if it is something as menial as getting the place cleaned up ^.^'
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
701 Posts
I agree with you on the medication part. Obviously I can't speak for everything and everyone but in my own experience, for the brief period I used meds, I later knew to realize that it was something inside me that made the difference, a mentality, not the prescribed pill that made the difference.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
100 Posts
Great advice. You should've been there for me back when I needed this kick in the ass =)

I tend to solve half of my problems with google searches. It's honestly amazing what a simple search for "how to cope with being depressed" will teach you.

The first result's a wikihow and it's a goldmine of useful thinking and helpful reminders. I'd link but my postcount's a failure.
 

·
QUEEN PEEN
Joined
·
9,303 Posts
Discussion Starter · #10 ·
Great advice. You should've been there for me back when I needed this kick in the ass =)

I tend to solve half of my problems with google searches. It's honestly amazing what a simple search for "how to cope with being depressed" will teach you.

The first result's a wikihow and it's a goldmine of useful thinking and helpful reminders. I'd link but my postcount's a failure.
Go ahead and post it once you get your post count up :) I'm sure a lot of people would find that information very helpful!

@Agent Blackout
Daww, thanks, man :3
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
100 Posts
Postcount's less of a failure now.

So here: 8 Ways to Cope with Depression - wikiHow

Wikihow's full of good articles on depression in varying situations, breakups, suicide, etc.

Definitely worth a look even if you aren't struggling, but especially if you are. Research can be one of the best cures for any kind of mental snag.
 

·
QUEEN PEEN
Joined
·
9,303 Posts
Discussion Starter · #12 ·
Postcount's less of a failure now.

So here: 8 Ways to Cope with Depression - wikiHow

Wikihow's full of good articles on depression in varying situations, breakups, suicide, etc.

Definitely worth a look even if you aren't struggling, but especially if you are. Research can be one of the best cures for any kind of mental snag.
Thank you for posting this :)
 
1 - 12 of 12 Posts
This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.
Top