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I have observed that I am acutely sensitive to the needs and wants of others in my immediate surroundings. I often feel as if I am receptive to the "feel" of any certain environment and my default function is to (un)consciously develop an equilibrium with said environment as it changes. I have not placed any judgement on this behavior or what I have to learn/do with it.

My point of contention arrives when I do not know how to cope with the emotions I "pick up" from others. This may be the effect of being an ISTP that is relatively pathetically inadequate in terms of understanding emotions within myself. I am in an intimate relationship that is beginning to deepen, so this reaction to others' feelings is expounded when I am with my SO (who feels emotions very intensely) It has become a bit more noticeable to her as I retract and shrivel up when I feel like I have no means to deal with the emotions I absorb. :/ [/too feely for me speak]

Have any of you 9's felt this trend in your interactions with others? Do you understand how you feel in social interactions or do you absorb the emotions of others?
 

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MOTM Nov 2012
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If I am consciously engaged in my surroundings I can feel deeply in the moment in alignment with the feel of the environment, if I'm not drunk I'll normally then back the fuck up and wonder what the hell it was all about and in hindsight perceive it as shallow or unnecessary, because they're not actually my emotions. The exception is anger, I do not absorb that well.

Uncontrolled emotions are not my forte, well unless they're happy bouncy ones, so I do not enjoy this process but as harmony in my environment is so important to me I must know two things in order to be able to pre-emptively calm the energy in the event something is about to disrupt things:

-What someone else is feeling, and
-What that feeling may lead too.

Knowing what someone is feeling isn't something I see as difficult and I doubt many people struggle with that, but knowing where it may lead requires me to experience it as best I can so I can know what reactions make sense. So I take on the emotion of the environment, not as my own emotion but as an experience.

This does not turn off when the mood is positive or peaceful as there's always the chance it will change.

Maybe it's deeper than that though, I don't know.

Of course there are times when I actually feel strong emotion for myself which I struggle to rationalise because I'm suxors at the feeling without thinking about it crap. But that's the ENTP in me kicking my ass, not the E9.
 

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I've been thinking about this all day.

A few points:

I am very sensitive to other people being angry. I feel like I completely freeze whenever anyone expresses anger, especially if I think it's unjust.

However, I am also sensitive to the "states" of other people around me, for example, full of energy, or laid back, or sarcastic, or happy, or tired, or sad, because putting two opposing things together creates conflict. I always sort of thought of a 9 as being avoidant of anger, but it's really avoidance of conflict or discord (but not always, sometimes I use conflict to resolve discord).

I rarely understand how I feel in social interaction, because I spend my time matching my state to those of the people around me to avoid discord. I'm a social chameleon sometimes.
 

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^ I agree with @listentothemountains -- I don't always understand how I feel in social interactions, mainly because I just take it in as it is. If I sense that someone is upset or the something is off but other people in the vicinity aren't picking up on it, I will simply direct them with a question like "What's been going on in your life?"

I have observed that I am acutely sensitive to the needs and wants of others in my immediate surroundings. I often feel as if I am receptive to the "feel" of any certain environment and my default function is to (un)consciously develop an equilibrium with said environment as it changes.
Yes, I do try to develop an equilibrium with my environment. Some environments are more difficult than others. For instance, I still haven't figured out how to equilibrate in a large social setting where there are people I know but the point is to "get to know OTHER people" and so I can't a) follow them around or b) apathetically sit by myself waiting for time to pass.

Do you understand how you feel in social interactions or do you absorb the emotions of others?
I absorb the emotions of others but I don't necessarily feel them myself at the moment (it depends on the emotion and the amount). When interacting one-on-one, if it is energy-taxing to interact with or mirror them (Fe/Si or Fi/Ne overload wears me out), I just try to be polite and attempt to shut down my own feelings so as to not express annoyance/frustration at them. When interacting in a group, I have no qualms about walking away from the group if their attention leaves me.
 
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