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Discussion Starter #1
I'm talking 30+

Adult ENTPs, what's it like to be you?
What has changed in your behavior/interests? What has stayed the same? I realize everyone is different, and so are their circumstances, but I'm still curious to see how ENTP characteristics manifest themselves in adults who've had some time to level out or mature.
 

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Haha .. I can write an epic post on the subject ... and it's funny. This will be my 9999th post. And I get to talk about myself :)

Age: 31

- I'm still very, very child-like. I don't even want to grow up.
- I have a tortured inner soul, but I can maintain a cool calm exterior in the face of most adversities.
- I like to romanticize the past a lot and love to talk about it
- I enjoy lengthy conversations about people and their lives
- I'm still not sure what I want to do with the rest of my life. I always find something, but seem to lose interest. Same thing with friends and friendships.
- I have a highly developed Fe --- enough that I come across as an xNFJ IRL
- I settled down early but went through an abusive marriage for 3 years before I finally told her to get lost and thankfully she did
- I keep defining and re-defining my world-view.
- I have far too many interests and lack the commitment and consistency to see any of them through. I gain a certain amount of expertise in everything and then just move on to something else.
- I still love video games :p
 

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The big changes:

Willingness to just accept rules I consider silly, rather than undermine them.
Going from overeager to just ready and willing
Learning the importance of being able to adjust my personality volume.
Going from someone who just likes to debate to more of a socratic gadfly.
I probably have fewer flights of Ne, but I'm more able to call it on demand.
Less messy, more willing to do drudge work because it has to get done, and
More willing to pick up responsibility because I like to see things get done.
Less afraid of conflict.

I'm still:
Pretty damn cheerful
Open minded and unattached to my various plans and plots.
Prone to acting quickly, and missing a detail (what I call my Achilles Heel Complex- my plans tend to have a silly flaw a five year old could spot)
Prefering passive aggressive behavior in conflict (although in comparison, having done a couple years in the military, I am now perfectly able to do normal conflict)
 

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Discussion Starter #4
This is such a great word.


Less messy, more willing to do drudge work because it has to get done, and
More willing to pick up responsibility because I like to see things get done.
Ahhh, perhaps there's hope for me yet!

Less afraid of conflict.

Preferring passive aggressive behavior in conflict
This I've never struggled with. I think a little bit in high school. Then again I may be confusing conflict with confrontation. Confrontation is something I'm very comfortable with because I see it as the opportunity for resolution. But yeah, I don't like when it turns into conflict, and when I know going in that someone can't be reasoned with, I prefer not to bother.
 

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The big changes:

Going from someone who just likes to debate to more of a socratic gadfly.
Well, shit. It looks like you've won. Impressive.
 

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This I've never struggled with. I think a little bit in high school. Then again I may be confusing conflict with confrontation. Confrontation is something I'm very comfortable with because I see it as the opportunity for resolution. But yeah, I don't like when it turns into conflict, and when I know going in that someone can't be reasoned with, I prefer not to bother.
Yeah, I've never been afraid of making my opinion known; I just usually don't try to win if there's resistance- I only need for the argument to be heard. Given the responsibilities I have now, I have to try to win from time to time because it matters since a city's health and safety can be affected. I'd prefer not to use guerilla style office tactics, but those are still what I do better and more effectively, so that's what I do.
 

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40+ here
How I've changed (grown up?):

- I have also learned the importance of being able to adjust my personality to fit my environment. In some ways I feel like I repress myself when I don't want to, but I also know that the full force of my personality is not always the best thing. I still have a full dialogue going in my head. I have just learned to keep a lot of it inside. I have learned social cues that allow me to get along with everyone.
- I have learned to get things done, from start to finish. However, it has to be a task I really care about, or one I am given to do at work. Then I do it well because it's best for my career. That's how I managed to do some things I would not have otherwise done and it feels really good. I even clean and organize my desk at work from time to time. NOTE: I cannot organize like anal-retentively neat people can. But I don't want to be that neat.
- I am really comfortable and happy with who I am (that took me a while).

What did not change
- I am a very optomistic person
- I still have a very hard time dealing with people that I consider stupid. I can deal with arrogance, but not stupidity.
- I can be a brutally honest person
- I am stubborn
- I really do think I can do many things better than other people
- I love being around people but am comfortable by myself
- I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up. I get bored and need challenges.
- I hate needless paperwork
 

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Well, shit. It looks like you've won. Impressive.
I think when you're younger, you like to think you know the big picture, but as you get older, that concept of big picture starts to change. When I was younger, for example, I challenged other people's ideas because I thought all ideas needed to go through the fire, and while I still think that, but I also think that it's better for them to come across the idea themselves to gain true and lasting understanding, I just try to midwife it for them.
 

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Discussion Starter #9
I've definitely hit the point of keep myself in check to fit my environment (interaction-wise). My environment has forced me to be conscious of not coming on so strong, so I know how to tone it down and actually be quite charming. And I'm better at ushering my ideas in without coming off like I disagree with people and more coming off like I want to build on their suggestions and expand the possibilities (even if I do actually just disagree with them). When I get too comfortable (or tipsy) around my inner circle, I can be slightly less thoughtful sometimes, but for the most part, I can catch myself.

The things I can't seem to nail down are the practical day-to-day things. It's so hard for me to motivate myself to organize or do tedious chores. Blech. It's virtually impossible for me to take on anything that doesn't entertain or stimulate me. I don't think I'd care about getting anything done if there weren't a paycheck involved even though I love my job. I hope this kind of stuff improves before I turn 30.
 

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The things I can't seem to nail down are the practical day-to-day things. It's so hard for me to motivate myself to organize or do tedious chores. Blech. It's virtually impossible for me to take on anything that doesn't entertain or stimulate me. I don't think I'd care about getting anything done if there weren't a paycheck involved even though I love my job. I hope this kind of stuff improves before I turn 30.
Hire a cleaning lady to come over once every two or three weeks. It's worth every penny. They do the real drudge work of detail cleaning, and you just have to keep up with the dishes and making the place "bachelor clean" (ie items that can carry typhoid in the trash, no clothes on the TV, things in the fridge that can walk are allowed to leave the house).
 

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Discussion Starter #11
Hire a cleaning lady to come over once every two or three weeks. It's worth every penny. They do the real drudge work of detail cleaning, and you just have to keep up with the dishes and making the place "bachelor clean" (ie items that can carry typhoid in the trash, no clothes on the TV, things in the fridge that can walk are allowed to leave the house).
That sounds like the perfect system. Unfortunately, I'm a recent college grad who just moved back in with her parents and only makes an entry-level salary. You can bet that as soon as I have the means, this will be the move. Thank ya!
 

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I'm 21. I have a questions for you older ENTPs.
I see myself with a very good job in the future, I have big plans for my life even tho they're are not solid right now (nor will they never be xD) I know that I'm gonna get there somehow because I trust my abilities and myself.

However, people, like my parents, and older people try block my motivation, they want me to settle down, get a boring job and a GF. Of course I dont lisen to them, but is this because they cant understand the potential and the visions of an ENTP. Or life isnt as bright as we tend to think it is?

Are you guys satisfied of your currents jobs, possition or living quality? Did you ever stoped dreaming and chasing opportunities?
Should I get to earth, or keep aiming for greatness?

Know that whatever appens, I wont stop until I'm up there, I'm a type 3. So there nothing thats gonna keep between me and succes, I just wanted to know whats going on with you guys.
 

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However, people, like my parents, and older people try block my motivation, they want me to settle down, get a boring job and a GF. Of course I dont lisen to them, but is this because they cant understand the potential and the visions of an ENTP. Or life isnt as bright as we tend to think it is?

Are you guys satisfied of your currents jobs, possition or living quality? Did you ever stoped dreaming and chasing opportunities?
Should I get to earth, or keep aiming for greatness?

Know that whatever appens, I wont stop until I'm up there, I'm a type 3. So there nothing thats gonna keep between me and succes, I just wanted to know whats going on with you guys.
At 21 you should get your f'ing up out of the way (and, as an entp you will mess up from time to time). Some people here will probably talk about the ennegram stuff being more important here, but my general opinion as an entp is I'd be happy doing what I was doing regardless, at least once I accepted it and had a chance to discover the boundaries.

You should probably start feeling the draw of stability in a couple years though. If you're in your late twenties, and not somewhat settled romantically and economically, it probably wouldn't be a good thing, and you might start to feel like you're missing something.
 

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Well sometime, when I'm Tired, I just want to calm down, have a GF to cuddle with everynight. But I dont let those feelings get very powerfull I "wake" up usualy in the morning and get fired up again for new projets. I have quite alot of accomplishement for someone my age and I intend on keep doing amazing stuff for a while.
 

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Well sometime, when I'm Tired, I just want to calm down, have a GF to cuddle with everynight. But I dont let those feelings get very powerfull I "wake" up usualy in the morning and get fired up again for new projets. I have quite alot of accomplishement for someone my age and I intend on keep doing amazing stuff for a while.
I wouldn't tell you to change, but you might be surprised how much you can achieve professionally if you have stability domestically. Things run pretty well when they can divided and delegated. Don't even get me started on how useful it is to have someone bounce ideas to and get critique from. Partners can be pretty damn useful.

That said, it takes work to get one, you're not missing it yet, and not having one allows for greater flexibility in what you do and where you go. Just keep it in the back of your mind that it will eventually be useful.
 

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I do not deny this at all, in fact I'm open for a relationship, but I havnt found someone willing to follow my "craziness"
And I understand them. I'm still dating someone at the moment, but we both know its not gonna go far, I give it a month at most.
 

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Dude, @Joey Couturier, you need to do what you're going to do before settling down. That energy doesn't go away. It just gets suppressed and comes out later, when it destroys careers and relationships. Don't let anyone rush you into anything.

Being a grown-up ENTP is fun. You get to be this 40+ year-old who still acts like a kid. None of the other 40+ year-olds get it.

Recent conversation with a nice, married guy:

Him: "Well, you know . . . when you're our age, you like to look at boobs, but you don't want to necessarily touch them or squeeze them . . "
Me (with incredulous look): "Jesus fucking Christ, speak for yourself . . "

Anyway, I hate myself far less now than I did 20 years ago and firmly believed I wasn't meant for this world. I still don't really seem to fit into any career field, but I am far less worried about it since I seem to deliver some contribution to whatever I try that people find important.

Life is good. Each decade has been better than the last: More fun, more wisdom, more money, more sex, less self-denial.
 

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Hey, wish me a happy birthday, I'm 49 today.

Nice to see so many other aged ENTPs in here...

Personally I am still looking for the answers. Have a stable life, successful career, big salary, great kids, husband interesting enough for me to stay interested. But I still yearn to run away and join the circus, most weeks.

I am better at managing my finances and keeping my room tidy than when I was 19.
I like myself a lot more.
I am less concerned with stability than I was, possibly because I have it. See running away and joining circus, above.
That last is an enneagram 6 thing, nothing to do with cognitive type, I think.

The only useful piece of advice I will offer today is: it's going to be OK. Just do what you'll do, and don't forget to enjoy it.
 

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Hey, wish me a happy birthday, I'm 49 today.
Happy Birthday alfreda!

I'm just a couple of months ahead of you in age and I'm still waiting to "grow up"... if you know what I mean... :-D
 

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I certainly have better impulse control than I used to. Like others have mentioned here, I have become better at adjusting my behavior in some situations (primarily work).

But no, I have never "grown up". I'm not going to be having kids, am in a marriage open to polyamory, still take off on unplanned road trips for no reason, buck social norms when they don't make logical sense (to me), never take authority wisdom seriously without fact-based backing and generally am seen as a crazy (but likable) mad scientist type.

I occasionally take hour long showers, just because my father always said I wouldn't once I had to pay the bills.

And I still become insanely more motivated to finish a project when others say it's doomed to fail.
 
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