The only thing I am sure of at the moment is that I am definitely a feeler (I tend to say "I feel" a lot), but I am not quite sure what type of feeler I am (Fe vs Fi). I identify with both - I tend to follow social norms (Fe), but with my close friends, I violate all of them sometimes. I also have a very clear notion of what is "me" (Fi), but I don't tend to evaluate my choices according to my values.
In terms of sensing vs. intuition, I am definitely sensor when it comes to schoolwork. I tend to recall which methods worked for me previously when I am given a new problem. Most of it has to do with efficiency, for me. However, I can get really irritated when I do understand why a certain method works. I am also obsessed with future security. I planned out my whole life out when I was young (Things didn't go as planned :laughing: luckily).
When I was younger, I had a pretty romanticized view of history also. I did what I was told, without questioning. I did have a vivid imagination back then (and now). I would fantasize a lot (What if I was born a princess? What if I had superpowers?). I also could read people well as a kid (though I was wrong sometimes). I knew which kids to trust and which kids to avoid/not mess with. As I grew older, the urge to find the "why" behind everything become more important, especially when I'm stressed. I would try to understand the meaning behind an action. I started questioning about life.
I guess I should fill out the questionnaire also~
0. Is there anything that may affect the way you answer the questions? For example, a stressful time, mental illness, medications, special life circumstances? Other useful information includes sex, age, and current state of mind
I used to be a pretty obedient kid. I was quiet and shy. I was pretty average in school, though somewhat of a late bloomer in terms of intelligence (depending on what type of intelligence we are talking about, but I'm referring to the type measured by standardized tests). Around the end of elementary school, I started understanding everything. I went from average to become one of the most "intelligent" students in class. From then on, I became obsessed with maintaining that to the point where I would memorize all the class notes (I understood the concepts too of course). By sheer luck (and brute force?), I got into the most competitive high school in my area. There, my old methods didn't exactly work and I broke down from all the pressure. I became depressed and suicidal for a while.
It was during that time, I became a completely different person (according to family and friends). I started becoming much more outgoing. I became sillier and goofier. I started going out more. I was still obsessed with my grades, but I learned to let loose. The weird thing was, I started to cancel on people a lot more. When I was younger, if I started something, I tended to follow through. During my depression, and now, I tend to cancel on people a lot (usually due to my mood), or would change my mind very frequently even after a decision is made.
At the moment, I'm in the typical college dilemma. I thought I wanted to become a doctor, but after talking to my mother, I broke down and told her I put a lot of pressure on myself, to the point where I would be afraid of my biology classes. i also started to volunteer at a hospital and found it quite dull. My mother and my friends advised that I find something else, preferably a subject that won't stress me back into depression. However, I am the type of person who plans very far ahead and security is very important to me (I tested enneagram 6 HA
So that's the back story.
TL;DR Typical coming of age story + other mundane details
1. Click on this link: Flickr: Explore! Look at the random photo for about 30 seconds. Copy and paste it here, and write about your impression of it.
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My first thought after viewing this photo is freedom. The vastness of the skies and the effortless blending of colors in the clouds makes me feel really relaxed. The two people in the center become the focus of the photo, similar to life. Life is about people. I feel as if there are multiple interpretations of this photo. One could say that there are two type of people in this world. The person of the left is not moving and just living in the moment, while the person on the right is walking along, heading towards their destination. That doesn't mean the person on the right isn't enjoying the view also. Another interpretation is that all that matters are the people around you, not the material goods. Here, all I see is nature and two people (who seems to be friends or lovers), and these simple elements combine together to make a photo that puts a smile on my face. A third interpretation I can think of at the moment is that humans have always ventured out, until they finished exploring the unexplored. I don't know exactly how I got to this one, but it made sense in my mind :tongue:
2. You are with a group of people in a car, heading to a different town to see your favourite band/artist/musician. Suddenly, the car breaks down for an unknown reason in the middle of nowhere. What are your initial thoughts? What are your outward reactions?
*Gasp* I don't like concerts usually because some of the artists I listen to cannot sing well in real life (Not going to mention any names...I hate fan wars too), but we're talking about my favorite
My initial/inside response:
- "Damn. All that money for nothing. We have the crappiest luck." *Sigh*
- "Maybe we can fix it. Hmmm....it simply can't be in the middle of nowhere. We're in the damn 21st century."
- "Hmm...Google Maps! With Google Maps, we can find repair/toll truck people. Thank the lord for 4G...oh please have 4G here....Should probably take out a real map too. Does the car have GPS?"
- "Maybe....we can see if any other friends are going. If not, we got to get outta here somehow."
- "Any restaurants or public places nearby? I'm hungry...."
- "Guys, let's calm down. We should focus on getting the hell out of here first. Someone see if they have 4G here and Google Maps. If not, check if car has GPS, or use a real map. Try to call a toll truck. If not, try to remember if we passed by any buildings before."
- "Call anyone you know who are going to the concert. See if they're nearby and beg them for a ride or for them to call a toll truck or drive us to somewhere where we can sit for a while."
3. You somehow make it to the concert. The driver wants to go to the afterparty that was announced (and assure you they won't drink so they can drive back later). How do you feel about this party? What do you do?
Initial though process:
- "BS. That's what they all say about the drinking. Honestly, I really don't like going to parties with people I never met. Hmm...how can I tell him/her I don't want to go without hurting their feelings. Hmmm...let's see if I can hitch a ride with someone else."
What I do:
If I can find a person who would drive me back, I'll hitch a ride with them. If not, I'll stay for the party I guess and make sure I don't drink so I can drive everyone back safely. I don't feel comfortable partying with people I never seen before anyways.
4. On the drive back, your friends are talking. A friend makes a claim that clashes with your current beliefs. What is your inward reaction? What do you outwardly say?
My beliefs tend to quite accommodating - I believe that people have the right to believe what they choose as long as they do not call other people out for having different beliefs. If my friend was just stating his/her belief, I would probably say something along the line of "Different strokes for different folks."
If they are trying to impose their view on others, I'll say that he has no right to force his ideas on others even other people in the car aren't trying to do the same.
5. What would you do if you actually saw/experienced something that clashes with your previous beliefs, experiences, and habits?
In terms of experiences and habits, I wouldn't really mind all that much. If these experiences or habits happen to fit/work better than those I am used to, I might try to learn from them and incorporate them into my own life. If I saw something that clashed my own previous beliefs, I will probably speak out if it were from my friends. With strangers, I would not do anything unless they are violent or hurting someone.
6. What are some of your most important values? How did you come about determining them? How can they change?
My most important values are hard work, persistence, responsibility (I try to live by this one, but I fail a lot), openness, kindness, and willingness to learn. My values are constantly changing depending on my experiences. I used to be a lot less open as child, but growing up has shown me the importance of being receptive to all points of views.
7. a) What about your personality most distinguishes you from everyone else? b) If you could change one thing about you personality, what would it be? Why?a. I think what distinguishes my personality from everyone else is that I can adapt myself quite well to different groups. I can sometimes voice the opinions of that group quite well, even if I disagree with them. However, if my beliefs do not align with the beliefs of a group, I tend to have a feeling of being "fake." Once, I get this fake feeling, I do not treat them as my close close friends, but rather, acquaintances. Thus, it took me a long time to find my own group of friends in school that I can truly confide in. I could alter the way I talk and sometimes, even my tone of voice. I tend to portray a different image in different groups of people, but people do not call me out for it surprisingly
b. I wish I was less sensitive and do whatever I want. My weakest point, according to many people, is being too easily influenced by others. I would want to do something, but if a friend would give me discouraging words or tell me it won't work out, I would become discouraged and most probably give up. I wish I was more of a thinker than a feeler I guess :kitteh:
8. How do you treat hunches or gut feelings? In what situations are they most often triggered?
In a test, if my intuition tells me choice A is correct, I would use my logic to understand why A is correct. If the logic works out, I would go with my intuition. If not, I would consider the other choices. In real life situations, I tend to assume a lot of things and run with it. Supposedly, I am very intuitive with my feelings and love life according to a friend.
9. a) What activities energize you most? b) What activities drain you most? Why?
a. Activities that energize me the most - photography, hanging out/talking with friends from time to time, shopping, reading, learning new things from my NT friends (INTPs, you guys are AMAZING!
, baking, trying out new foods, having a deep conversation with friends (INTPS....as you can see, I love INTPS, and INTJs too!), dancing, staying indoors form time to time, watching dramas and cartoons, sleeping!
b. Activities that drain me the most - competitive environments (I become a robot. I tend to be much more creative when I feel less pressure), conflicts, ambiguous relationships, chores, housework, laundry, messy workplaces, disorganization, too much time alone/socializing, dealing with difficult/passive aggressive people.
10. What do you repress about your outward behavior or internal thought process when around others? Why?
a. I repress my negative thoughts and emotions for the fear of coming off as too intense or emotional. I only review my negative feelings to extremely close friends, and only at times when I am really down. Then, afterwards, I become my old smiley, happy go lucky self again. I think I do this because I do not want to expose my vulnerabilities?
b. I usually do not show that I am annoyed at people, unless they're my family. I don't want to hurt people's feelings.
c. If I dislike someone, I do not show it either. I act very nice or hyper around them. I also tend to feel very bad for not liking someone.
Other random things:
- I hate writing in traditional paragraphs. I tend to organize everything into lists or outlines
- I am a skimmer when I read. Don't judge me :tongue:. I don't proofread also (Please don't hurt me grammar nazis....:sad
- I abuse emoticons
- I can be too much of a perfectionist sometimes (I can't help it! I just get a twitch!)
- I tend to get along with INTPs really well. Not sure about INTJs as I only have one INTJ friend I think and he gets on my nerves sometimes, but he's a great friend)
-I am obsessed with planning for the future, which is bad sometimes
- I have a hard time taking the first steps when a task seems daunting
- I tend to start small projects but I never finish them
- I am very very indecisive and change my mind A LOT (I thought I was an ESFJ, ENFP, ENFJ, ISFJ....the list goes on....
Thank you everyone :kitteh: *bows*
Free virtual hugs for everyone unless you're not into hugs