Dear ESFP, are INTJ attractive to you? If yes, why? If no, why not? I'm trying to get the big picture on this, i.e. what other types think about us in terms of attraction.
https://ibibliophilia.wordpress.com/2010/04/25/my-nemesis-the-esfp/My Nemesis, the ESFP
In my last post, I noted that INTJs show they care by conducting research on their friends and love interests. I was thinking about how others express interest/affection, and I was going to remark the following: “Notice how there’s no ESFP forum. They are all too busy dotting their ‘i’s with smiley faces to discuss their personality and various related issues.”
After I wrote that, I searched Google and actually found an ESFP forum. I was very amused at the differences between the INTJ and ESFP forums, which naturally reflect the very obvious personality differences in the authors.
INTJ and ESFP are terms for Myers-Briggs personality types. INTJ means Introverted-iNtuitive-Thinking-Judging, and ESFP means Extraverted-Sensing-Feeling-Perceiving.
The ESFP is the INTJ’s “anima” in type relationship theory, whatever that means. I know they are opposites on all four dimensions of personality, and they have a very hard time understanding each other. They probably annoy each other, especially if they do not understand and appreciate personality differences.
One of the first questions on the ESFP forum that I spied is, “Do INTJs make you sad?” This struck me as extremely humorous, as at least one ESFP has said that about me.
Also, half the postings have smileys in the title: “A question for ESFPs .“ I mean, is that really necessary?
In a post entitled, “What is your biggest problem in life?” people responded, “due dates and procrastination,” “handling too much responsibility,” “head in the cloud questions [from Ns],” and seriously this was a reply, “Problems? What problems? I ignore them until they go away or blow up in my face.” Each of these replies was punctuated with several superfluous smileys. Are these really the worst problems an ESFP deals with? Really?
The INTJ forum has thousands of postings, scrupulously organized by topics such as “Relationships and Dating,” “General Sociology,” and “Philosophy and Ethics.” The ESFP forum consists of a few dozen posts, randomly thrown on the site’s wall.
On the ESFP site, I noticed an awful lot of abbreviations like “u” (you) and “lol” (funny). The INTJs are articulate and precise, spelling out every word correctly and using excellent grammar. The ESFPs are imprecise and slangy.
I feel okay about picking on the ESFPs for several reasons: firstly, because I pick on myself and the general INTJ population; secondly, because they don’t like to read, and if they randomly came across my blog in a search for emoticons, they would be lost and confused and probably depressed, so they would quickly click back to adding flair on facebook; thirdly, they really don’t understand irony and nuance, so they probably wouldn’t “get” what I’m writing anyway.
I'd more interested if these people would just come straight out an ask instead of this kind of passive aggressive shit. I'm amused that he doesn't know how (and I do) the shadow/under stress theory, because if that were the case he'd know he'd be displaying the negative traits of an ESFP as we naturally display the negative INTJ traits under extreme stress or illness. Ugh...wow my step dads intj and we get along fine not that i've had any dodgy thoughts about him i find intj's quite interesting to talk to as they are a wealth of knowledge.
it does sadden me when they talk like that, it must come from a logic point of view but it's still saddening and makes me wonder has he met a ESFP and clashed and then thought were all like that. i don't know in truth but it is sad when that is said.