ESTP - Kissed as though he was hungry for a piece of meat. We didn't have sex.I humbly apologize. It was not my intention to offend in any way. It seemed to me the recurring theme in the relationships you described was pretty straightforward. I don't get your analogy at all.
Why was the ESTP a bad kisser? One, for more or less the same reason that scarfing down your food without chewing it is a bad strategy for eating. Two, for what that revealed about his attitude. Even though I didn't know he was looking for one last stand before his wedding, he certainly did broadcast a certain oafish greed.
ENTP - Squeezed his eyes shut & panted like a dog. Movements were overly repetitious, unembellished, to the point of being mechanical. Later admitted he'd been fantasizing about his crush.
Why was the ENTP bad? For the same reason that an actor sucks if he goes onstage, squeezes his eyes shut, and spits out his lines, all the while imagining that he's somewhere else.
ENTJ - To his credit, and totally unlike the ENTP, his mind was in the game. His problem was that he was too cerebral & too talkative. If I'd realized that that was the problem, sure, I'd have advised him on it. At the time, I assumed that either (a) sex was overhyped in general, or (b) I just didn't care for it that much, or both. Had nothing better to contrast with.
Why was the ENTJ bad? For the same reason an actor's performance is bad when you keep seeing him thinking while he's onstage, unable to delve into the role. At least he's giving it everything he's got, but due to overthinking, he "gets in his own way". To be fair to the ENTJ, he was certainly better than the ENTP.
That's two people who were bad at sex, and one who probably would have been, judging by his approach to kissing. Whether that's two or three, I still don't see a pattern. You can be one of these three things re sex: good at it, bad at it, or so-so at it. You can be anywhere on a scale of goodness and badness, but it's still either zero, negative, or positive. It's also hard to be exactly at zero, and none of them was. So IMO it should take more than two to determine that there's a pattern. If one had been bad and two had been good, that wouldn't be a pattern either. If you include the ESTP bad kisser, then it's 3:1. Still not a significant ratio when I'm only using two categories: good and bad.
The reasons they were bad are different. Two were matters of attitude: the ESTP and the ENTP. Again, I don't say the ESTP was bad at sex, because I don't know; he was just a bad kisser. The ENTJ's problem with sex wasn't his attitude; it was something that I think he couldn't control.
The jealousy issue also only occurred with two of them; I don't see a pattern there, either. Neither the ESTP nor the ENTP was jealous. You could make the observation that the two who were jealous were the same two who were neither (a) about to get married nor (b) focused on someone else, though. It would be fair to assume that those are related.
The INFP, however, doesn't want anyone else, but also isn't possessive towards me, so he doesn't fit that mold. He's also the only one who was worth keeping around. :jazz::heart: