[theredqueen]

I just found out that i am an ENTP a couple of months ago. A little bit surprised that the description fits me a lot. I've always been manipulative to people, even the people in my inner circle. I like to dominate things and commit crime without getting my hands dirty.
So, i've been in a relationship with an ISTJ for 4 years. My boyfriend can be a little bit boring, but i can still stick up with him. You guys must be questioning why, well i am not actually committed into a serious relationship, but i admit that i need someone, which i don't know what for. All these 4 years, i have gone through some affairs with other guys, not really in physical cheating or serious relationship, but more like flirting and act like couples. He never found out, but it's me who always told him that i had affairs. In here, he's the victim, but i somehow always managed to make him feel that he's the one who's guilty for making me cheating on him; that he admitted that he's boring and stiff. It's satisfying for me. Also, the guys that i had affairs with knew about my boyfriend, but again, i made them empathized with me and blamed my boyfriend about it. After i cut ties with them, they're somewhat too obsessed with me to let go, and i hated them for that and making them know that i despised them. I'm the dominant one in this relationship, for whole 4 years, but my boyfriend still sticks up with me and get through all the shits i cause. Everytime i make mistakes, i make him sure to apologize to me, because i threaten him to leave him. It's satisfying. I know that this really sounds a toxic relationship, but i just can't get enough of it. I am aware that somewhat what goes around, turns around, and it terrifies me but i still can't stop. I'm impulsive and i am sure that i have OCD, like when my threats don't work and he ignores me, i can dial his number hundred times even though his phone is turned off, i just want to make sure if his phone is on. But he can still say that he loves me and really committed to this relationship. He always talks about marriage. I am just like "Wow! yes of course i want to get married immediately", while actually it scares me to death. I don't know if this is love, but is it obsession? I can't imagine myself living without him, but i also still want to have fun with other males out there.
Second, i have an ex in my college. After broke up, we still did some big projects together. I mean, it's no big deal for me, because i didnt actually have feelings for him, i sometimes don't even remember he's my ex. But what makes me so uncomfortable is he always talks about our past relationship and proud of declaring himself as my ex everytime we work with other friends. That's disgusting. He's also a bad leader, we got into an argument once, really big one, and what disgusted me the most was he's using an ad hominem attack. It just makes him look stupider. He also acts like almighty and big, so full of himself. I came to realization that i hate him. So, i purposely made up scenes again so he attacked me. I know his pattern, this is my speciality to find people's pattern of what makes them triggered and else. Like usually, he attacked me personally. I didn't respond and played victims here. I talked to others about what happened and they emphatized with me, so again, he's despised by other people. Then he told me better next time we dont work together again. Then we ignored each for two months. And i got another big project in my campus. He always wants to beat me academically and other leadership things. This project is pretty big and worldwide, so when he knows that the university asked me directly to handle this project, last night he texted me and apologizing. Somehow, i always and also predicted the pattern that sooner or later he would come to me begging for forgiveness. That's where i'm satisfied, him losing the game he thought he won. He hates apologizing, but i made him apologize, for nothing and i will not still involve him in the project.
Is it just me being evil or is it because i am ENTP?

 

[Inveniet]

Is it just me being evil or is it because i am ENTP?

It is because you are human.
It is also because he does not give you the sadism you want.
When you are done torturing your poor ISTJ,
you might think about finding an ISFJ that can torture you instead.

 

[Chemical Teddy]

Type is only a piece of the puzzle. Personality disorders are unrelated to type, though some types tend to have a certain personality disorder more frequently than others. Jung was pretty clear on the fact that his theory wasn't supposed to describe or predict behavior, although there is a sizable amount of people in the community that favor that approach.

I personally hate when people justify their poor behavior with their type. To me it's evidently nonsense and it ascribes a certain toxicity to the type in question. NTs in particular are victims of mistyped edgy teenagers (or immature adults) who want to be like their favorite anime villain or something. Kant was Kant despite his inferior Fe, and while genuine healthy NTs can be a bit brash and accidentally insensitive they also want be good people.

 

[Cherry]

I feel the same as the user above. Blaming/pinning poor behaviour and mistreatment of others onto a personality type, is as bad/silly/fruitless as pinning it onto astrology or the likings. We all have things we can learn from each other. Abusing people is a choice, for anybody, regardless of type, and it sounds like you continually choose (and gain enjoyment) from emotionally abusing and manipulating your partner. I truly hope you set him free, and without making him feel there was something wrong with him. Also, since you're openly admitting the truth here, I hope you can do that with him too and further to that, speak to a professional about this behaviour because it's clearly coming from somewhere rather unhealthy.

 

[IDontThinkSo]

Manipulative and sadistic people typically score "TJ" or "FJ" if tested properly. People scoring "P" on the MBTI scale are tested positively for their adaptiveness, thus more likely to have submissive tendencies and more reluctant to control, to manipulate their environment. If you are ENTP then you must have a weak drive for your attitude.

 

[Ermenegildo]

If you doubt your type go to the ESTP or to the ‘What's my personality type?’ forum. Enjoy the power of your vaginal magnetism as long as it lasts, and go to the General Psychology forum if you want to know whether your treatment of men meets the requirements of a disorder.

 

[ilovegoodcheese]

I just found out that i am an ENTP a couple of months ago. A little bit surprised that the description fits me a lot. I've always been manipulative to people, even the people in my inner circle. I like to dominate things and commit crime without getting my hands dirty.
...
...
Is it just me being evil or is it because i am ENTP?

Your description sounds to me more like INTJ than ENTP, but your last sentence is full Fe, so I think you are an stressed ENTP behaving as INTJ.

ENTP under continuously stress/preasure behave as INTJ, and viceversa. The idea is that E <-> I and P <-> J in an attempt to adapt to some big and continuous stressor. The problem is that this "adapted" INTJ performs actually very poorly compared to a true INTJ, and makes lots of errors and incoherences. Probably when by ones own actions the stressor weakness, then oneself fall back to the "inner" ENTP and then further actions become incoherent (like displaying empathy after cheating).

I have seen this in a ENTP coworker of me, he is male, but behaved when I meet him as you describe. Now is more relaxed and behaves more ENTP. Curiously, all the cheating with his very long term girlfriend also went away. I think he finally accepted that he is fully in love with her, and even they are separated by a long distance, this is not a big problem for them because they have been many years together.

Anyway, I think that the key question that you need to answer yourself is if you are under stress or no, and if you are, take actions to get rid of it appropriately. That probably will solve the incoherence.

 

[ilovegoodcheese]

Manipulative and sadistic people typically score "TJ" or "FJ" if tested properly. People scoring "P" on the MBTI scale are tested positively for their adaptiveness, thus more likely to have submissive tendencies and more reluctant to control, to manipulate their environment. If you are ENTP then you must have a weak drive for your attitude.

That's very interesting indeed!. I always puzzled from where my submissive tendencies came from. So, it is my "P"!. But I know a FJ (actually INFJ) that is as submissive as myself, is that an exception?. Would you elaborate a little bit more in it ?

 

[IDontThinkSo]

@ilovegoodcheese to be more specific, I would place it on a FI <-> TE balance. A tolerance for anxiety vs anger. If adaptive feelings kick in more easily, people have troubles hurting others and their environment. So high Fs despite being FJs can naturally have that behavior of "being good with everyone", though they would still be emotionally manipulative (seduction). Because they're more likely to revert the attitude than their judging function, when dealing with fear (anxiety/anger).

For the same reason a high T ENTP would be on the sadistic side, but not a full blown manipulator. (seduction+no remorse)

 

[FueledByEvil]

Control. You have no control over you so you must exert it on others for some
selfish one up style to make you feel relevant via making them less than.

Its unhealthy for anyone involved. You should not try and be honest with
them you should try and be honest with yourself.

Just because we tell it how it is as ENTP does not mean we need to
be so overtly honest that we hurt people and thats okay because we
chalk it up to: "well I told them thats how it was" That is shallow.
Near sighted. You know it is wrong. As well as just saying to people
stuff like "well I have to be me" Yeah I get that but when it comes to
relationships we all must bend a bit ...and not just for sex

You seem lost in yourself and confused as to what you want and need.
Self reflection and working on healing your pain is the place to start.

It is not very ENTP at all to hurt peoples feelings on purpose.
P. We are aware of this. To say we are not is a lie or folly, misdirection
of your own feelings.

The people you crush under your heel today (exclusively for personal gain at their behest)
are going to be the regrets of tomorrow. There is a better way.

I wouldn't say any of this if we were talking about business. But we are not.
We are speaking on peoples feelings and their lives.

Be mindful, as most people have hearts.

 

[HeadofHudet]

Evil is a delicate thing. I don't exactly mind necessary evils, like that things costs money, or understandable evils, like selfishness. A lot of different "yeah, this sucks" things about the world that I can accept just fine.

But then there are the completely unnecessary evils, such as making a huge text without paragraph. This I cannot tolerate. This makes me hate your guts.

 

[rookthecrook]

OK first off - stupider is not a word.
Second, you sound young and uncertain of yourself, two variables that don't bode well for a healthy relationship.
My advice is to not enter shitty relationships in the first place, so break it off with this guy and start working out who you are by exploring your interests more.
ENTP doesn't equal being evil, we just value honesty and can be insensitive without meaning to, but this gets better with age.

 

[desire machine]

I feel the same as the user above. Blaming/pinning poor behaviour and mistreatment of others onto a personality type, is as bad/silly/fruitless as pinning it onto astrology or the likings. We all have things we can learn from each other. Abusing people is a choice, for anybody, regardless of type, and it sounds like you continually choose (and gain enjoyment) from emotionally abusing and manipulating your partner. I truly hope you set him free, and without making him feel there was something wrong with him. Also, since you're openly admitting the truth here, I hope you can do that with him too and further to that, speak to a professional about this behaviour because it's clearly coming from somewhere rather unhealthy.

you're just saying that because you're a capricorn

(jk i agree w/ what you said)

 

[Ronney]

You have a passive dude that isn't pulling the pin on you relationship when he should and you are making the most of it.

One day you will be old and wrinkly and you won't get the chance to use up men the way you can now.

 

[Clare_Bare]

Is it just me being evil or is it because i am ENTP?

I'm kinda doubting you're an ENTP.
Far too many extremes in your statements that go way beyond the typical machinations of an ENTP's personality.

Whether you've mistyped or not, you definately need therapy for your insecurities and manipulative behaviour.

 

[Cherry]

you're just saying that because you're a capricorn

(jk i agree w/ what you said)

i'm not a capricorn tho hehe

 

[Ronney]

There is such thing as a female Psychopath. Will likely type as ENTP or ESTP

 

[Blue Ribbon]

I just found out that i am an ENTP a couple of months ago. A little bit surprised that the description fits me a lot. I've always been manipulative to people, even the people in my inner circle. I like to dominate things and commit crime without getting my hands dirty.
So, i've been in a relationship with an ISTJ for 4 years. My boyfriend can be a little bit boring, but i can still stick up with him. You guys must be questioning why, well i am not actually committed into a serious relationship, but i admit that i need someone, which i don't know what for. All these 4 years, i have gone through some affairs with other guys, not really in physical cheating or serious relationship, but more like flirting and act like couples. He never found out, but it's me who always told him that i had affairs. In here, he's the victim, but i somehow always managed to make him feel that he's the one who's guilty for making me cheating on him; that he admitted that he's boring and stiff. It's satisfying for me. Also, the guys that i had affairs with knew about my boyfriend, but again, i made them empathized with me and blamed my boyfriend about it. After i cut ties with them, they're somewhat too obsessed with me to let go, and i hated them for that and making them know that i despised them. I'm the dominant one in this relationship, for whole 4 years, but my boyfriend still sticks up with me and get through all the shits i cause. Everytime i make mistakes, i make him sure to apologize to me, because i threaten him to leave him. It's satisfying. I know that this really sounds a toxic relationship, but i just can't get enough of it. I am aware that somewhat what goes around, turns around, and it terrifies me but i still can't stop. I'm impulsive and i am sure that i have OCD, like when my threats don't work and he ignores me, i can dial his number hundred times even though his phone is turned off, i just want to make sure if his phone is on. But he can still say that he loves me and really committed to this relationship. He always talks about marriage. I am just like "Wow! yes of course i want to get married immediately", while actually it scares me to death. I don't know if this is love, but is it obsession? I can't imagine myself living without him, but i also still want to have fun with other males out there.
Second, i have an ex in my college. After broke up, we still did some big projects together. I mean, it's no big deal for me, because i didnt actually have feelings for him, i sometimes don't even remember he's my ex. But what makes me so uncomfortable is he always talks about our past relationship and proud of declaring himself as my ex everytime we work with other friends. That's disgusting. He's also a bad leader, we got into an argument once, really big one, and what disgusted me the most was he's using an ad hominem attack. It just makes him look stupider. He also acts like almighty and big, so full of himself. I came to realization that i hate him. So, i purposely made up scenes again so he attacked me. I know his pattern, this is my speciality to find people's pattern of what makes them triggered and else. Like usually, he attacked me personally. I didn't respond and played victims here. I talked to others about what happened and they emphatized with me, so again, he's despised by other people. Then he told me better next time we dont work together again. Then we ignored each for two months. And i got another big project in my campus. He always wants to beat me academically and other leadership things. This project is pretty big and worldwide, so when he knows that the university asked me directly to handle this project, last night he texted me and apologizing. Somehow, i always and also predicted the pattern that sooner or later he would come to me begging for forgiveness. That's where i'm satisfied, him losing the game he thought he won. He hates apologizing, but i made him apologize, for nothing and i will not still involve him in the project.
Is it just me being evil or is it because i am ENTP?

ENTPs are not evil by nature. I'm more likely to be subject to emotional manipulation than be manipulative myself. I feel sorry for your ISTJ. I suggest you do the right thing and let him go. I'm not saying that people don't come without emotional baggage. I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder and I do have my moments of crazy but I'd never hurt my partner on purpose or even consider cheating on him. I think you may have some problems yourself and I highly recommend you get therapy. It'll improve your relationship with others.

 

[atamagasuita]

No. You're evil

 

[SouDesuNyan]

Try expanding your story a little. Perhaps make it a short novel. Include a part where you fake your own murder. You can call it "Gone ENTP Girl".