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"Passive-aggressive behavior is the indirect expression of hostility, such as through procrastination, stubbornness, sullenness, or deliberate or repeated failure to accomplish requested tasks for which one is (often explicitly) responsible."

Do you do this?
 

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Yes. All the time.

People are too stupid to take a hint though.
 

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Strangely, no. I just tell people upfront why I'm distressed and move on with my day.
 

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Of course there have been times that I have, but it's not a typical mode of operation for me.

I think there are two tendencies of ISTJs that can be misinterpreted as passive aggressive behavior when it's actually not at all:


  • We have a tendency to not engage in activities until we have a clear path to successful completion mapped out for ourselves. Others that are more prone to (recklessly!) jump into things may see this as passive-aggressive "feet-dragging", but it's only our typical cautious and thorough approach and has nothing to do with passive protestation.
  • Despite our typical loyalty, once we accept that a relationship has gone irrevocably sour, we tend to completely pull the plug. Others may *act* cold and distance themselves with the intent to hurt the other party by doing so, but once an ISTJ cuts ties, we REALLY cut ties. Once you're on the outside of our "circle of trust", we're extremely unlikely to waste time and energy trying to punish you by playing games. If you're used to people that like to play those games, you might tend to incorrectly interpret the ISTJ behavior the same way.
 

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Not usually, blatantly. I can be quiet or seem passive. It may be because I don't understand what to do or how to do things. Usually it isn't malicious or out to play a game. I am not a fan of that too often in a negative way and making jokes and passively putting people down. I like to say things directly and honestly to others with understanding. I agree a lot with @jcal .
 

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I use to exhibit this type of behavior in my teens and throughout my 20's if I felt I was being treated unfairly at work, within my family or from my boyfriends. Not so much, now. Since then, I've learned to address those problems as they arise by expressing how I feel verbally without sounding as if I'm complaining or whining about it.
 

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^ This. I want to know exactly what I'm doing and how to do it before I start. Waste of time to start, back up, start over, start again... no wait... FORGET THAT. I'll take longer from the start if I know what I'm doing and how to do it correctly the first time.

Also... cutting ties completely with soured relationships is pretty much my MO. No calls, texts, emails, Facebook, NOTHING. I've even gone so far as to change my telephone number more than once to make this point. IOW, if you have somehow managed to to totally eff up (which is pretty damned difficult if you're "in" to begin with) there will be absolutely ZERO question of your non-status with me.
 

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If I know I can get someone to easily lose their temper, I might do something to push their buttons, just because its so easy. But I am not sure if that qualifies as "passive aggressive" or just simply "slightly aggressive and pushing it a bit."
 

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Sometimes, because it is hard for me to be overtly confrontational (might be a 1w9 thing). It's like, if I'm the only one doing most of the cleaning in my suite, I'm not going to tell my suite-mates that I think they are messy and need to start cleaning more. I'll say, "Man, the dishes need to be done" (meaning not by me, otherwise I'd be doing it instead of saying it). Or, I'll even say, "I'm not going to be the one to clean the toilet again." People don't get the hint that it's their turn, though. After that, I'll wait longer than I normally do to take out the trash so others will get a chance, or I'll just stop cleaning (except after myself). When things get noticeably messier because I'm not picking up everybody's slack, I'd expect them to break and start cleaning. Doesn't work, apparently. It's amazing the mess some people can live in. I always break first, and until recently, I'd just resume cleaning up after people again. Now, I've just become numb to the mess. I won't act as a maid. Guess I'm going to have to suck it up soon and be overt ("Can you clean the tub, can you clean out the fridge, sweep the floor please, etc"). I just don't want to seem bossy, and I don't like having to control other people. I'd rather they notice when they need to do something on their own, hence passive aggressiveness.

Gosh, this practically belongs in the ISTJ rant thread.
 

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If I know I can get someone to easily lose their temper, I might do something to push their buttons, just because its so easy. But I am not sure if that qualifies as "passive aggressive" or just simply "slightly aggressive and pushing it a bit."
Who does this usually apply to? Frenemies/random people/SOs?

Should I be concerned about opening myself up in a relationship? :rolleyes:
 
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I think @jcal summed it up nicely.

To reiterate:

Likely all of us can be passive aggressive at times, but it is not a typical mode of operation. Personally, IRL, I am much too confrontational to be very passive.

Also agree that when I cut someone off, it is permanent, abrupt, and they will not receive any communication from me, outside of what is necessary for work to be accomplished.
 

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At my work, passive-aggressive behavior is what gets a response (which I find incredibly annoying). I tend to be very direct and have tact, but it's not received well. Does anyone know if passive-aggression is an introvert thing? My husband is an extrovert and I can be very direct with him without repercussion. In fact, when I am passive-aggressive, he gets irritated.
 
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At my work, passive-aggressive behavior is what gets a response (which I find incredibly annoying). I tend to be very direct and have tact, but it's not received well. Does anyone know if passive-aggression is an introvert thing? My husband is an extrovert and I can be very direct with him without repercussion. In fact, when I am passive-aggressive, he gets irritated.
ENFPs can often be passive-aggressive.
ExTx have low tolerance for this behavior from my experience.
 

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I tend to fall back on passive-aggressive mode when people expect of me something that I find as being unimportant, unnecessary, beyond my scope of responsibilities, simply not my business, among the themes concerning which I already expressed my reasons why I'm not going to do this stuff etc.

Each time I hope that hint wouldn't be lost, but for the most part my hopes remain unjustified.
 

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At my work, passive-aggressive behavior is what gets a response (which I find incredibly annoying). I tend to be very direct and have tact, but it's not received well. Does anyone know if passive-aggression is an introvert thing? My husband is an extrovert and I can be very direct with him without repercussion. In fact, when I am passive-aggressive, he gets irritated.
I don't believe it is a personality type thing as much as it is a learned behavior. It is generally best avoided, as it is an unhealthy way of dealing with conflict.
 

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I find passive aggressive behaviour difficult to sustain. I dislike it when others use it to try to send a message; I'd rather have them tell me what's wrong straight to my face, so I can fix it. I've found that passive aggressive behaviour seems more common with Ti/Fe users, although perhaps that's just a coincidence.
 
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Who does this usually apply to? Frenemies/random people/SOs?

Should I be concerned about opening myself up in a relationship? :rolleyes:
Its rarely used. No special categories of people. Most apt to apply to people in authority or who think they are.
 
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