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Are you socially awkward?
 

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Maybe a bit more than normal but less than extremely bad.
What you think makes you awkward, not recognising that there are some implicit "social rules" or not caring about them?
 

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What you think makes you awkward, not recognising that there are some implicit "social rules" or not caring about them?
I am not a social god and I don't have friends around the universe. However, there are some people with very serious attitudes and people with stuttering both of which slows down their ability to have a conversation. I usually don't suffer from these limitations which I think are a key cause of awkwardness. I don't usually make people uncomfortable via my words. Sometimes bored if they can't penetrate the surface of deadpan expressions and see a joke. Though on the other hand I ignore many conventions or contest them. I don't really think about it so I don't know many examples off-hand.
 

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When I was a kid, yeah, a little.

But then I grew up sexy. Now being awkward at a party is kind of impossible. All you have to do is stand there and look mysterious. Then, when they ask you something, and you don't answer like they would expect, it just intrigues them more. Well, two kinds of people:

1. Grown Men
2. Confident women

Hierarchically speaking, the rest are socially inconsequential. So, no. I'm not generally awkward at gatherings now.

However, social life is still exhausting, so I tend to avoid it when I can. Especially since I'm married and have the most interesting guy in the room at home every night anyway.

I'm very awkward in artificially constructed social settings like the PTA, parent playgroups, community meetings, or organized "teams." Sometimes also in religious settings where you're supposed to be nice, not mysterious (but even there, when other people are grateful for the opportunity to be nicer than you are, it can work). I can get slightly aggressive when aggravated in these rule-and-ritual-heavy settings, like a wolf with its foot in a trap, so I mostly just don't do them. If they're unavoidable, I can usually beg my ENTP husband to either do them on my behalf, or at least come with me to keep me from exploding.

tl;dr I don't fit in, but often that's an advantage. Where it's not can be worked around.
 

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Nope not as long as I remember however I despise social places of all kinds ever since I was a kid I never liked being around people and realized I was different from an early age so I just avoid people in general now even in college I never sit with other students I am always sitting alone listening to music or reading about something
 

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My INTP best friend is slow to recognize social cues. As in, he either doesn't know or doesn't bother to notice when he comes across as offensive/cringey to other people. So, like a really authentic, give-no-fucks aura. It can come across as awkward, but it depends on the people experiencing him and their opinion rarely matters.
 

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Dunno, my friends aren't friend enough to tell me, if so, it appears.
I feel awkward a lot in social settings for sure. It's just finding a reason to talk to people that bothers me most. Often there is no other than 'to talk', which I kind of find a waste of time, makes no sense and doesn't really seem to be that inviting either.
Maybe I'm just afraid of more people wanting stuff from me, that I avoid by simply not adding them to the list of people I know.
Aside, I simply don't care about meeting people, it helps as well.

When in my role at work, I have no issues with socialising at all, perhaps because it then somehow at times is a more detached 'role' to play or something, it just exhausts me to be fake. I try to be myself as much as possible though.
 

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I'm actually not that bad... I think. I'm not the other person observing my behavior. I've never exactly felt "in the zone" with it though, and I tend to not appreciate behaviors and mannerisms that are repeated because they are reliable but are actually very ingenuine. But then technically I would feel more comfortable defaulting into doing these things, just for peace of mind.

I don't feel comfortable in the safe and socially expected behaviors and manners, not that I find exactly anything wrong with them besides what I mentioned. I kind of unconsciously build up a sense to how someone reacts to myself and accepts myself to where I can feel comfortable behaving more naturally. This can take a while though. Which is why small groups make more sense to me.

One thing I don't get: saying hi to people when you walk by them. I think most highschool drama was due to the false interpretations this can suggest: "why did she say hi to her and not to me?!" (I imagine it to be more a female thing) I basically say hi back to anyone who says hi to me, but I avoid initiating a greeting for fear of it offending someone, or even the same person if I don't do it again later. It's also annoying to think of having saying hi to everyone constantly.
 
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I have been, but I've learned to fake it and get by. My timing and so on have improved. It works as long as the interactions are short and not much is expected of me. I'm just that nice islandlight that no one really knows much about. I also have a few acquaintances I can be myself with.

But I'm no good at some things. Examples:

Visiting an individual or couple I don't know very well; I can't really keep up my end of the conversation if we don't hit it off.

Group conversations where I'm expected to discuss politics, art, or morality, or where there's gossip. I do have strong opinions, but I'm not willing to discuss them in public.

Any kind of gathering where there are a lot of fake rules or ceremonies. I'm fine with some fakeness--in fact I depend on it just to get by socially--but I have my limits, and I can be considered awkward by people who want more from me.
 

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Awkward doesn't even begin to describe what I am. I just don't know how to respond in certain (read: most) social situations, my brain usually goes "oh no, I don't know what to say, help, it's my turn to speak, what do I do, BRING ON THE PANIC", that makes me overthink even more... cue the awkward silence. It's due to a paralyzing fear more than anything else, I think I might have a certain degree of social anxiety, maybe even an avoidant personality. (Not sure if I'd be diagnosed with an actual disorder, though. Maybe, who knows, who cares.) However, I find that actively trying to engage in social situations with people I know well (and therefore am not scared of) is slowly making things better. I've always responded well to exposure therapy.
 

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Socially awkward, yes, but I still know how to party.
 

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Awkward doesn't even begin to describe what I am. I just don't know how to respond in certain (read: most) social situations, my brain usually goes "oh no, I don't know what to say, help, it's my turn to speak, what do I do, BRING ON THE PANIC", that makes me overthink even more... cue the awkward silence. It's due to a paralyzing fear more than anything else, I think I might have a certain degree of social anxiety, maybe even an avoidant personality. (Not sure if I'd be diagnosed with an actual disorder, though. Maybe, who knows, who cares.) However, I find that actively trying to engage in social situations with people I know well (and therefore am not scared of) is slowly making things better. I've always responded well to exposure therapy.
I once had a boyfriend who used to go to parties and just stand there with his back against the wall looking cool. He was probably ISFJ. Before I knew him, I would watch him in fascination because people would just wander up to him and engage him and he'd barely have to do anything. He had so many friends following him around, and yet it looked like he didn't need any. I think part of the reason I wound up dating him is because I wanted this power for myself. I watched, and I learned. It was hard for me and against type, but I think I got it, and I still wind up "channeling" that guy when I need to in strange situations.

Of course it helped that he had a beautiful wardrobe and looked interesting, so I've always tried to remember that too. The peacock factor.

Anyway, my point is, don't underestimate what people will do if you stand on the wall and look disinterestedly in their general direction. If you start practicing young, it could pay off eventually.
 

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Discussion Starter #17
I'm very socially awkward myself as well, incredibly so.
However, I've always find myself in a "forgiving" environment, so I've never actually thought of impoving my social skills.
I studied philosophy both as an undergraduate and a postgraduate, and philoosphy students have never been famous for being particularly socially apt.
Now is a bit different. I'm conscious of the fact that I can't interact very well with people, and sometime this stresses me, especially when I know this is going to be a disadvantage. For example, at the moment I'm applying for a PhD. A potential supervisor asked me to go and see him and visit the university. If were do to so, I will probably blow off my chances to get admitted. I hate small talks and I don't know how to properly introduce myself to new people.
 

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Are you socially awkward?
Not an INTP, and so on. However, I wrote this in a different thread, which I feel summarises my thoughts on this topic relatively well:

Seq said:
I'm not sure what you mean by 'charming' and 'telling them what to think'. However, I am very aware that there are certain norms and expectations that one is often supposed to conform to when interacting with others. Personally, I ignore those norms and expectations. I simply cannot bring myself to care about them, no matter what I do (such is the life of ignoring Si).

Instead of abiding by the rules of convention, I tend to move on to abstract ideas immediately. Generally speaking, people don't appreciate that. Even if they don't dislike abstract ideas, they often seem to find the sudden shift to ideas intimidating. Furthermore, I tend to pursue logical consistency quite relentlessly when I have such conversations. I think that this is probably quite overwhelming and unusual to people.

For the most part, the above also applies when I talk theoretically to people about themselves. So long as the relevant norms and expectations are in force, people won't open up. However, if someone is feeling bad, they're far more receptive to having theoretical conversations (about themselves) than is normally the case. Thus, I usually develop relations with other people by talking abstractly to them about themselves during circumstances when they have little choice but to ignore the norms and expectations.

Unexpectedly, I tend to feel disadvantaged and isolated from people due to norms and expectations. It might be that you're looking to express a similar feeling. I always long to meet people whom are open to have the kinds of conversations that I am interested in having, without the therapist detour. I don't mind talking to people about themselves, but I would prefer to do it on equal terms, where I can feel sure that they're not discussing my other ideas with me for no other reason than that I helped them out with their personal problems (to the point where they trust me blindly and dogmatically).
 

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If I don't really have anything to say to the person and it's too formal than yeah. With new people I have to be careful of being too quiet or too loud and eccentric.
 

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I feel as if over a few years my inferior Fe has developed into something similar to a tertiary Fe where I thrive on making social situations awkward for the fun of it. It mostly manifests itself in (mostly) playful jabs at whoever I am having a conversation with. I find it an extremely effective way at disguising social cluelessness as for some reason it comes off as very genuine
 
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