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Sometime , I find meaning everywhere and also find I m too serious ..
When I m on infj forum , I like to share experience , but damn it s always become some wide deep thing that only Yoda can understand (or a zen buddhist monk of 70 years )

Why aren't there not much funny , sunny side (that s why I love enfp forum in fact , they are so dynamic and carefree )

what do you think ?

isn't because our Ni function always focus on Futur and our Si function focus on comparing past and present in order to derive some conclusion for Futur.

Doesn't the idea that we haven' t time to enjoy present make you sad ? ( i mean usually we don't enjoy present , it s either something from past like memories , either something for futur (potential )))
 

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@firelink
I think the deepness is part of who we are and isn't something to be fought against or regretted.

But to some extent I disagree when you say

Why aren't there not much funny , sunny side
I think there's some great humour that comes across here. Recent example is the "pet peeves" thread. But even in the more serious threads there is frequent funny stuff along the way.

Doesn't the idea that we haven' t time to enjoy present make you sad ? ( i mean usually we don't enjoy present , it s either something from past like memories , either something for futur (potential )))
I agree this is a danger. Certainly one i've fallen into - being nostalgiac about the past, fantasising about the future and overlooking / missing out on the present. But, as so often, once you become fully conscious of this you can hopefully start to do something about it.
 

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I am thinking often too dark^^
but: if I am "out there" you find myself often laughing an joking; i love funny movies, and often, I just laugh because of a funny thought o_O!
 

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I think INFJs can be masters at seeing the most ugly things in life, diverting them from which is an art that I hope to master some day
I think .. That they might be masters of knowing that everything has positive and negative angles, that any position has opposition and that good and bad are relative.

And of course they are just Humans.. Prone to mistakes and susceptible to all the maladies (Physical, mental and emotional) that affect humankind.

@firelink .. Typology is just subtext. It does not define a human being. Type is just a position and it is subjected to opposition and every position in between as is every position in life.

Is your life complicated? Stop complicating it.. Are you unhappy? Stop being unhappy.. The difference is the myth of the INFJ "persona" (thank you @LiquidLight for this articulation) VS the actual INFJ personality type. If someone is unhappy and says "I am an INFJ and I am unhappy.. So INFJs must be unhappy".. Then we can see how easily this stuff becomes corrupted.

INFJ is by far the most claimed personality type by people who are not INFJs (at least on these forums) So it is no wonder that the gulf between what is an INFJ and what isn't, keeps getting wider and wider.

People have it backwards.
You are bigger than the type.. You do not apply yourself to a type.. You apply a type to you.
 

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I see no issue with being deep or too deep but at the same time I believe in keeping things in balance which leads to more enjoyment and preventing many negative issues. In this case, try to develop your Se function by doing Se activities example: a walk in nature just focusing on the surrounding or on your breathing, anything that activates the senses and keeps you engaged in the present moment.
 

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The depth of INFJs is something other types respect and value so I view that aspect of my personality as a positive. If the idea of being a type that doesn't focus on the present makes you sad, you can always work on developing your Se more. :) As for ENFPs being more light-hearted and fun, that's generally true. My mom is an ENFP and I really enjoy her optimistic, sunny approach to life. I enjoy having ENFPs as friends, too. However, there usually comes a point where I find their lack of depth disappointing.
 

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Discussion Starter #8
The depth of INFJs is something other types respect and value so I view that aspect of my personality as a positive. If the idea of being a type that doesn't focus on the present makes you sad, you can always work on developing your Se more. :) As for ENFPs being more light-hearted and fun, that's generally true. My mom is an ENFP and I really enjoy her optimistic, sunny approach to life. I enjoy having ENFPs as friends, too. However, there usually comes a point where I find their lack of depth disappointing.


It s sure they haven't so much layer than us (I dono how much I have but i surprise me sometime when I digg on it ).
Can you explain this experience you have ? It s sometime shows a little bit up but not a lot .
 

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After talking to my mother about everything and nothing over a lunch she only left me with a "Don't get too deep, things can go bad."

Yeah, I try not to think at times, but shutting off something that doesn't want to be shut down... Also, to ask me not to be too deep. It's like asking a fish to suck it up whilst drowning on dry land.

That being said when I talk to genuine people which are happy and are who they really are and don't care what the world thinks, well that makes my world go around another day.
 

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It s sure they haven't so much layer than us (I dono how much I have but i surprise me sometime when I digg on it ).
Can you explain this experience you have ? It s sometime shows a little bit up but not a lot .
What happens is that conversations initially go well because we find common ground due to the shared NF. This gives me a feeling of wanting to pursue whatever topic we're on more deeply. However, they usually end up flitting off to another thought/can't seem to hold their attention on a given topic long enough to pursue it more. It leaves me feeling like, "That's it? You don't want to explore this interesting topic further?". :/
 

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Sometimes I wish I dared to show more depth to people. I usually just assume that nobody would be interested in my strange thoughts, so I try to keep conversations light and conventional. If the conversation goes deep, it's always because the other person in some way initiated it. I actually found myself in the middle of a big philosophical discussion at a party this weekend, and even if I had no knowledge of the topic, I loved every minute of listening to them. When I told my high school friend about the evening, her reaction was to laugh and say "I'm glad you never talk about bullshit like that at our parties". Sometimes I feel that my friends don't know me at all...
 

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Being deep is cool - it sucks when time for chat is short like on a break of 20 mins. IMO it takes around 25 mins to get a deep convo - like to pick up the momentum, unless you are with an equally deep person then it can start right away. I think depth is present it everyone in some shape or form but it has been locked down in their consciousness never to be opened because they dont need to be deep but for others like myself I really couldn't have it any other way, it is a gift and a torture but arent most things after a while? :D
 

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I have been told that I say a lot of things that are deep. You know what I tell those people? I tell them that what I say isn't deep, and that it's only scratching the surface of existence :p
 

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I think there's a reason some stereotype INFJs as the conspiracy theorists. I think we have to be careful not to get too lost in our inner worlds, in case we detach from reality altogether.

But in terms of being sunny and happy...I do quite a bit of that with my friends. It doesn't come up here often, but it doesn't mean I can't get...sneaky....
Humorous...
MUHAHA!
<turns into a fish and bounces all over the place>
...did I mention random, too?
 

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In a world so often as shallow and superficial as a puddle, it's nice to dip into the deep end of the ocean every now and then. Personally, I don't view it as a negative, but as a positive. Besides, we have humor around here. It might not always be butterflies and sunshine stuff, but it's there. It's just usually more witty and/or sarcastic. ;o) I'm not saying it's necessarily better, mind you. Just different.
 

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I like analysing the world and thinking deeply about things, however this can lead to negative fantasies/thoughts and rumination. Im also more likely to think negatively if im alone for long periods
 

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Do you really mean deep, or serious?

Ni/Se is a pretty serious combination, it's true. But I think anybody with an introverted perceiving dominant function will have a lot of seriousness in their character. Si isn't something we really own as INFJs; it's buried deep in our subconsciousness. Unless you're speaking about the socionics perspective? I know they tend to hold different thoughts on the relative consciousness of functions. Or do you have your own theories?

Depth is pretty relative. I would suggest that people who have managed to develop their less-used functions have likely gained perspective that would make many of us INFJs look pretty shallow.

Luckily for us, as we continue to develop, it gets easier and more comfortable to be in the present, to let go and have a good time without constantly second-guessing ourselves and questioning about the future.

I've found that bringing more Fe and Se in to my life has stimulated growth and made me appreciate life much more :happy:
 
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