Question: ISTJ men and romance (focus on romance novels). Also mysterious and unattainable ISTJ males striking to the heart of yet another female (
@Sela thank you).
Answer: Post mine, a little cleaned up and modified.
The original thread by
@Horseshoe with the purpose of writing a book:
http://personalitycafe.com/istj-for...s-i-am-desperate-find-out-more-about-you.html
Not meant to be a stereotypical rip on women.
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ISTJs are seen as being remote and very hard to get to know - yet there is a huge "payoff" for the girl once she can crack him open and get into that gooey center. Yes there is a gooey center. This is partly why us ISTJs are so slow to get to know people and to move forward with our relationships: we want to take our time, be sure, get it right. ISTJs are like onions, we've got layers... <_<
When you look at modern romance novels, you see that the male protagonist is very much the "Alpha" type: strong, remote, handsome, very competent, domineering, sometimes abusive and cruel. He'll often jerk the female protagonist around a lot, to the point where she's at her wits end and she constantly wonders why she puts up with him - yet there's just too "something about him" for her to leave.
When she's FINALLY about to give up and leave - he cracks. He breaks down, reveals all his feelings for her, etc. She has worn him down, gotten to him, changed him. An enormous upwelling of love in both their hearts - true love, riding off into the sunset, etc. This is like female porn/crack. (Sounds so cynical.)
Now, how does the average ISTJ male come across as: strong, remote, very competent. If he's halfway good-looking then he's over halfway there to the "ideal" man that's been pushed down many girls throats by romance novels.
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As
@niss remarked, this sounds like the story of Samson and Delilah - except that Samson dies at the end.
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My source for that above analysis of romance novels: the book "A Billion Wicked Thoughts". Its an in-depth analysis of sex and porn searches on the internet and it claimed basically the above structure for romance novels written with women in mind or written by women.
I decided to double-check that claim. Local library, four Mills & Boon "bodice rippers". I didn't finish book #4, threw it across the room.
By the way guys: don't bother working too much on your abs. While they're nice to a woman, most romance novels concentrate on: chest/shoulders, butt, and legs.
Obligatory "Nice Guys" video, illustrating this point (this struck me immediately upon first sight - and I still like the video, mostly because it has been true in my experience):
Addendum: I'm thinking of grabbing three-four Cosmopolitan magazines this weekend. It will be interesting to see what pap the twenty-somethings of this world shell out money for in the interests of becoming dissatisfied with themselves/their boyfriends/and to be marketed to. My personal bet is that over 50% of the magazine will be advertising or stealth-advertising masquerading as informational articles/advice.
:laughing:
And it's midnight here in New Zealand. Stuff in this post will be incoherent - sosumi. :tongue: