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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hi,

I was just wondering if you tend to assume incompatibility with people from certain lines of work? Like when you are about to meet somebody and discovers that they're from a certain line of work you'd think "yeah, we're not gonna get along." As for me I do this with accountants, bankers, and the likes. They just seem so normal and talk about normal things. Does this have something to do with the possible incompatibility between INFP with whatever type accountants mostly are (please fill the blank for me)?
 

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Hi,

I was just wondering if you tend to assume incompatibility with people from certain lines of work? Like when you are about to meet somebody and discovers that they're from a certain line of work you'd think "yeah, we're not gonna get along." As for me I do this with accountants, bankers, and the likes. They just seem so normal and talk about normal things.
Well, yes. They're bean counters. Could make pretty good money; but, they're likely to be about as normal as normal gets.


Does this have something to do with the possible incompatibility between INFP with whatever type accountants mostly are (please fill the blank for me)?
Don't know what types accountants, bankers, ... usually are. In recommended career listings by type they are usually associated with ISTJ ("The Duty Fulfiller").
 

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I've grown up in the 'bible belt' and I think the place I have the worse time placing assumptions on political and religious groups of people. That's due to really the very bad experiences I've had with far to many people. Which I know would happen probably anywhere, they're just very loud about their extremely conservative opinions and typically end up being rude without knowing it. Though vice versa, they could view my disregard towards the things they value just as insulting. I recognize that, and end up sorta adopting the 'agree to disagree' attitude. Not sure If I really hit on exactly what you were asking, sorry lol.

With specific job types I 'usually' don't, considering in my short 28 years on this earth I've done the following: Server/security/cook/lifeguard/cna/police academy/tattoo artist/ and now a commission artist. After working in areas like restaurants/hospitals/tattoo parlors ect it gave me a bit broader of a perspective so I tend not to even judge Police arresting people breaking laws I personally feel are basic human rights ect. Before experiencing police-work, I did however just have a sort of 'natural' dislike for them. I experienced all those different careers mainly because my family did not support my artwork/music until quite recently. I always have an initial assumption of people, but give everyone benefit of the doubt as well. And typically I will not 'get along' with people who loudly oppose some of my views, I keep it civil and know it'd just never really work out in a friendship without some insane hard work on both sides. Though I like my 'bad' assumptions to be wrong, and enjoy finding the exceptions in my own close-mindedness. Helps me strive to be more humble.
 

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Lol @budi.sudaryo... I work in IT and I used to work in the IT department of a bank. I walked away with two friends who are transvestites, one who is heaaavily into BDSM and a couple of friends who are weekend goths... all very interesting people who love to chat about meaty things.

I guess I view accountants, bankers and bean counters as potential hidden gems... you never know what is lurking beneath the surface of those very carefully constructed veneers :)

But I do agree, I had to wade through some major snore fests to find my gems...
 

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Police almost always grate on my nerves. Attorneys. I'm very wary of them but still try to begin each encounter hoping for the best. But I know I'm looking for cues that support my prejudices, so I try to compensate for that as well. I tend to avoid self disclose my faults and I've found these 2 professions tend to assume if I'm admitting to doing 1 thing wrong there must be lots of times I'm not admitting. Most attorneys and Police I've known won't admit culpability.

Of course I've had neighbors who've been involved in all sorts of professions my interactions with them are always friendly.

I knew a DEA agent in San Diego many years ago who violated many values I hold dear. One day at a church outing some young children began screaming about a big spider so I went over to see what kind it was. It was a huge female Black Widow. I told the children to stay back from it, then when I had a clear shot I stomped on her. I didn't even know the DEA guy was near, when I heard him berating my for my cruelty. I tried to explain that I was protecting the children, but he wasn't hearing anything I was saying. The Black widow had been sprayed earlier and was weak because of it. I could not understand his logic but I tried to listen. One of my friends came up to me and said "there's no point it trying to understand the unreasonable", then took me by the arm. The whole situation made no sense to me. To make a long story short, that DEA agent never let go of his anger and resentment for the rest of the time I lived in San Diego. Many people came up to me afterwards to lend support. It seems there wasn't a soul in the congregation he hadn't offended at some point.

By this point in my life I've witnessed enough abuse of authority and holier than though behavior from cops and attorneys, even while they knowingly bear false witness or withhold exculpatory evidence that they make me physically ill at times. I could tell many stories.

So I don't mind admitting that I'm prejudiced today, but my opinions have a basis in fact. Now I am less naive but my sense of humanity still precludes me from condemning new people I meet. But I think I will always mistrust them.
 

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I might have said yes when I was younger. Now, it really depends. Are they in their of work because it is what they want to do it or because it was the work they could find that paid their bills? Are they trying to put themselves through school? Are they trying to support someone? What do they do in their off-time? Some people find it hard to find work that fulfills them and so they pursue their real interests in their time off.

If I have a moral objection to their line of work, then yes I will view us as incompatible; but if the issue is simply that I find their work boring, I try to set aside my biases and find out who people really are.

I mean one of my good friends is an accountant! And she is certainly not "normal" or boring (she's an INTP btw). That's just what pays the rent.
 

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Like others have already said, the real deal maker (or breaker!) is whether their values are compatible with mine.

Of course I have my own preconceptions about people and careers, but I can usually put them aside because I know they're just that - assumptions, based on my own ideas rather than on evidence I have yet to uncover. I think avoiding someone based on their career makes the assumption that someone is working that job because they want to. In this kind of economy it's entirely possible that someone has chosen a relatively "safe" job that they really hate, just to put food on the table. Or maybe they're trying to fund a certain lifestyle. Or maybe they've been pressured into it by family or their partner. Or maybe they've had to accept something "beneath" them because their qualifications weren't recognised in a new country, or because when they started studying they'd been told that they were pretty much guaranteed a job, but then upon graduating found that all the extra students from previous years had flooded the job market and now there's nothing left for them. You just don't know.

Plenty of other things to take note of, which are more accurate. Like going out to lunch or to the shops with them and seeing how they treat people serving them. Or taking note of what they talk about to you and why. Or asking them about what they love to do, rather than how they make money...

(On a personal note: my partner studied engineering and is training to be a pilot. My own work experience has taught me that people from these two professions tend to be the most obnoxious customers. Now I could have dismissed him based on that, but then I'd never know that in actual fact he's dying to get out of his field of work, and that he's clever, open-minded, creative, passionate about travelling and sound... all traits which I love in people and not all associated with some of my least favourite customers.)

OMG @fair phantom why did you pretty much say everything I had to say while I was writing this novel?! You stole my thunder! Unfair! :p
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
This perception of mine stems from my years as an accounting student in college. I only had like 2 close friends there. All the others seemed to misunderstood me, and we just didn't have anything similar. Now I see all accountants in that way lol. But yeah, of course there are a few gems among them, ones who're somehow stranded there and hate the job and I always think, man, that's a waste of potential. They deserve better.
 

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This perception of mine stems from my years as an accounting student in college. I only had like 2 close friends there. All the others seemed to misunderstood me, and we just didn't have anything similar. Now I see all accountants in that way lol. But yeah, of course there are a few gems among them, ones who're somehow stranded there and hate the job and I always think, man, that's a waste of potential. They deserve better.
Someone in a TED talk I watched suggested that the way we relate to the world and the way our intelligence works is to, over time, collect impressions and store them. Then when a new situation is encountered, the first thing we do is go back into our collection of impressions and try and match the new situation with a previous experience and our interpretation of facts are colored by these previous impressions.

I find that realizing that helps me not generalize too quickly.
 
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Most people give out a "vibe" to me. I am left with, within seconds, of my 1st impression of them. I adjust my avoidance or engagement, based on their vibes. It's not always what they say to me, but how they say it. An overall feeling I get. I also see myself as very self-preservation based, so at the same time I am assessing danger or protection. Accountants? It depends. If they are funny, I'll probably be temporarily drawn to them. One of the greatest loves I ever had, was with an Paramedic/fireman IST* type who loved his firehouse, scanner and all things war and military. Police? Mostly I'm wary of them because they hold so much authority over me. i just assess what is in front of me (human) and go from there.
 

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Most people give out a "vibe" to me. I am left with, within seconds, of my 1st impression of them. I adjust my avoidance or engagement, based on their vibes. It's not always what they say to me, but how they say it. An overall feeling I get.
This is classic INFP right here. It sounds like it came right out of the book.
 

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I'll have to mention now I used to be an accountant-light (accounts payable). It didn't go well... :laughing:
 

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Unfortunately, yes I suppose I do judge. I don't for a second invalidate anyone's job in society and I don't assume anyone is a bad person for the job that they do. But a job is a really big part of somebody's life, and if I have absolutely no interest in what they do or anything about what they do, then I'm probably not going to want to be thought of in that way or want to talk to them about any of that stuff. I have friends from all backgrounds, but we never speak of work so you can only get so entangled with their lives.

These occupations include: anything to do with business and the business ladder, finance and stocks and accounting, counselling and psychologists, people who are very into politics and sociology, sport, health and fitness, missionaries and preachers, sales, farming, and probably a few more. Again, there is nothing unimportant about any of these jobs nor anything presumtuously tedious about the personalities of people doing these jobs, but it doesn't spark an interest in me at all. At ALL.

Other occupations to which I am drawn are in science, teaching, music, drama, art, graphic design, medicine, optometry, video game design, tattoo artistry, nursing, baking, dancing, literature... Basically anything to do with helping other people, art, or something revolutionary and developmental. Just because this is the kind of stuff that interests me! I like inspiring people, and so I like finding inspiration in work. Plus there's something lovely and authentic in most of these lines of work, and I admire the courage to go and do something that isn't just "for a secure job" and the like.

Go forth and be wonderful creators, INFPs x
 

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I'll have to mention now I used to be an accountant-light (accounts payable). It didn't go well... :laughing:
Ahem, we are still waiting to get paid. Sending us a picture of a rainbow is not acceptable payment.
 
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