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ATTN Female ENTP (preferrably ages 23-30):

To YOU: Is INFJ The MOST Attractive type??

Please explain thoroughly!

PS, I am Male INFJ age 30-35
 

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Well, I fall a bit outside of the age range, but I'll speak up.

I do find INFJs very attractive, yes. I like really quiet guys, and it's nice to be with someone more organized than myself. My desire to be with another intuitive type isn't an uncommon one, so I don't feel the need to explain it.

In the end, however, I prefer INTJs. Things didn't work out so well with a certain INFJ in my life, so since then I'm not so sure about relationships with the type. I know a lot of ENTPs do prefer INFJs, though. You guys are pretty cool. At the same time, some ENTPs don't like the feeling that the INFJ wants to tame and control them, which often seems to be the case.
 

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That's cool how your age varies between 30 and 35. Mine stays a constant number for a year before it goes to the next one in sequence.
You must have missed the discovery of subjective intervals. Apparently the 29th one last at least twice as long as all the others.... weird, I know.

As to INFJs. I'd sure like to be able to put in my opinion, unfortunately men don't walk around w/ INFJ buzzed into their eyebrows so I'm not aware of anyone who subscribes to that label. HOWEVER, I do have a female colleague who's an INFJ and she's one of my favorite people... ever. No shit. When I started reading about the INFJ/ENTP weirdness, it pictured kinda sissy guys (no offense, I feel like I need to clarify) that wanted to be all soft and sensitive. Once I found out she was an INFJ... I must admit, a male version of her would keep me occupied for some time. She's WAY different than me, but she's really strong and succinct, and she comes from an absolutely different frame of mind. Somehow, we always end up on the same page and have a ton of respect for each other. Perhaps I'm allowing my imagination to get away from me, again, but I'm super duper intrigued by all of this. It's become my mission, secretly, to meet an INFJ guy and see if I can actually feel something really intensely. We'll see.
 
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I don't think I've ever met a male INFJ. But in short, No. Sorry. I have great friendships with INFJ's, but I've never thought a relationship would work. I tend to have a lot of disagreements with INFJ's - but as I said, it works for friendships, so perhaps I'm wrong.
 

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I'm an INFJ and I haven't met a male INFJ myself in real life. Or many female INFJs for the matter.

At the same time, some ENTPs don't like the feeling that the INFJ wants to tame and control them, which often seems to be the case.
Control is not exactly the way to describe it. Let me describe the dynamics. I've had two ENTP friends express interest in me:

Guy A
He would say the most inappropriate things. Most of the time, it's funny. Other times, it just... hurts. Because he cared about my feelings, he started to watch what he joked about my country, race, physical appearance etc.

This guy wasn't very affectionate too. The only time he'd turn warm was when I said something particularly insightful or smart. After some heavy hinting, he started to do some of the lovey-dovey things like send me good night messages. They're still more funny than sweet. But I gave him points for effort.


Guy B
I'm neutral about him but he has some interest in me. After another fight, I simply refused to talk to him, answer any more of his emails, messages etc. A mutual friend asked me what happened and I was pissed enough to list down all his flaws- his inability to ever admit he's wrong and say sorry, the lack of emotional support when I confess to him my troubles, the terribly insensitive things he'd say instead etc.

One year later, we reconnected via the same friend. He also told this ENTP what he'd done to upset me. This time round, he improved in all the areas I complained about. I was touched to say the least. But I still don't have any romantic feelings for him and we remained friends.


I don't think I started out with the idea of controlling these two guys. But they adjusted to me along the way because they cared for me. I've also grown a thicker hide after befriending them and learnt how to be less emotional when expressing my frustrations. INFJs and ENTPs are very different and a romantic relationship between them is one of mutual growth. It's not always easy but it can very beautiful if it eventually works out.

P.S: I'm not sure whether the flaws I mentioned about my ENTP friends apply to all ENTPs. But from what I've observed, they probably don't. I have two ENTP gal pals and neither is like this. Take these flaws with a pinch of salt if you will.
 

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Well, I fall a bit outside of the age range, but I'll speak up.

I do find INFJs very attractive, yes. I like really quiet guys, and it's nice to be with someone more organized than myself. My desire to be with another intuitive type isn't an uncommon one, so I don't feel the need to explain it.

In the end, however, I prefer INTJs. Things didn't work out so well with a certain INFJ in my life, so since then I'm not so sure about relationships with the type. I know a lot of ENTPs do prefer INFJs, though. You guys are pretty cool. At the same time, some ENTPs don't like the feeling that the INFJ wants to tame and control them, which often seems to be the case.

Couldn't say it better !
I have issues to deal with feeler men in general
 

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I think, I also feel more secure with a thinker (especially thinker judger). Otherwise, I have this feeling of reversed role relationships and it's what got me out of some...
 

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I'm over 30 so have no business being here in this thread.

Ah well, gatecrashing is fun....

why is it that often men want a woman who is significantly younger than they are? Is this about breeding age, or control? Just musing....

I don't know many INFJ men. Potentially interesting, the one that I know, yes. If I wasn't taken I'd be interested. He was certainly interested in me. But I think that to live with an INFJ, I'd spend a lot of time thinking, oh ffs, lighten up!
 

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the age stereotype most of the time really amazes me, why is it so important to some people that their partner should be older or younger?
 

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Unlike some in this thread, I have mastered the art of relative age. I am indeed aged 23-30.

I have heard that the INFJ type is the most rare, and consequently, I don't think I know any male INFJ's. However, I strongly believe my mother is one, and I have quite a strong connection with her. However, I do think that there is a controlling side to her that doesn't trust me in some of my creative ventures. It takes me some some time to really sell it before she jumps on the band wagon.

In a relationship, I think I find NT types more stimulating, however, the introvert who has a dominant feeling side gives the affection and devotion that is absent from the NT's in some cases.
 
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Well... I haven't met many (if any) INFJ men, and I fall out of the age category BUT I can say this.
I think that ENTP and INFJ are good together. I have an INFP crush, and we get along brilliantly.

- ENTP are introverted extroverts and INFJ are extroverted introverts - great! This balances them out, but they both still are awkward socialites, and/or are equally worn out around people. ENTPs can help to intitiate social activity with INFJs, and INFJs can help relax ENTPs when not being social.

- Two Ns generally get along, because they both love hypothesising and thinking of ideas.

- ENTPs are generally more rational, so put thought into making decisions affective. They can also offer good advice. INFJs can give emotional insight, and comfort ENTPs emotionally.

- ENTPs are a mess. INFJ can give some organisation to their lives, and the Pe function of ENTPs can give some spontaneity to INFJs.
 

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no. too much of "i'm too special for the world dadada" bullshit :)
 
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