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Discussion Starter #1
In one of the INFP descriptions I saw this ( INFP - Jung Type Descriptions ).

I don't really know if I'm an INFP (I think I'm either that or an ISFP, I'm not sure), but I can totally relate to that bit. I was wondering, does anyone else feel the same? For instance, storylines with tragic or sad endings always appeal to me way more than storylines with happy endings (in fact, I tend to hate happy endings with a passion). I also like to involve myself with the people I feel I'm close to when they are down or sad; I really like to listen to their problems, their "scars", and be a shoulder for them to cry on. In fact, I'd even go as far as saying that, when I'm feeling depressed, a small part of me... enjoys it. I don't really know how to describe it, but that's how I feel sometimes.

Anyone feels identified with any of this?
 

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I'm attracted to duality more than sad things alone.

I think what attracts me to sad endings or seeing a person's scars is that it seems that people want to deny the sadder things in life. If we don't talk about it, it can't hurt us. When I see a person's more vulnerable side, I see a more complete and human picture. Suffering is a part of life and can't be denied. The more you hurt, the greater capacity for joy.
 

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I'm attracted to duality more than sad things alone.

I think what attracts me to sad endings or seeing a person's scars is that it seems that people want to deny the sadder things in life. If we don't talk about it, it can't hurt us. When I see a person's more vulnerable side, I see a more complete and human picture. Suffering is a part of life and can't be denied. The more you hurt, the greater capacity for joy.
exactly my view. I love talking to people about what they like and want to do, but I want to know more about where they've been, what they're holding onto... what makes them human. I think it is the best way to really get to know someone. And it is the hardest, because then you are truly vulnerable.

I think sad stories without happing endings, whether fiction or non fiction allow me to get a grasp on reality in the comfort of my own home. You realise that it is part of the human condition to feel and experience all sorts of things.
 

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Yep. Happy seems fake. Happy seems harsh and discordant. My least favorite color is yellow because it is too bright and it seems unnatural. I much prefer dark blues and greys.
 

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Discussion Starter #5
I'm attracted to duality more than sad things alone.

I think what attracts me to sad endings or seeing a person's scars is that it seems that people want to deny the sadder things in life. If we don't talk about it, it can't hurt us. When I see a person's more vulnerable side, I see a more complete and human picture. Suffering is a part of life and can't be denied. The more you hurt, the greater capacity for joy.
Maybe that came out wrong in my post, I didn't mean to say that I don't enjoy "happiness". I don't so much in fiction, but that's about it. I enjoy being around cheerful people (if I like them, that is), for instance, as pretty much any human being does.

But yes, I have to agree. I've also thought of that many times. When someone is willing to tell you about the stuff that worries them, about their fears, their sorrow, etc... That's one of the situations where you can best get to know that person, and see their most genuinly human side (so to speak). Being someone who despises the superficial kind of relationships with people, I guess that's why I like to get involved in those kinds of things.

Anyone else feels that a small part of them "enjoys" being sad or depressed, though? Or is it just that I'm batshit crazy?
 

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I'm not INFP but I will post this anyway.

One of the reasons I enjoy historical fiction is that everyone in the stories has died, perhaps long ago, and have mostly been forgotten. For some reason I find that inexpressibly melancholy.

I have no problems with my own mortality, but I find the thought of being just part of some forgotten past terribly sad.

And for some perverse reason I enjoy that sensation.
 

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Truly and Completely

I am constantly attracted to things of a sad nature, in so many ways it's more real, more viceral, more beautiful actually in many ways.

storylines with tragic or sad endings always appeal to me way more than storylines with happy endings (in fact, I tend to hate happy endings with a passion)
It's the balance, I want a balance of both happy endings and sad endings. The problem is Hollywood in it's infinite wisdom to cater to what the masses think they want, is always influencing the happy ending to generate more revenue. So when I actually experience a "negative" ending it's all that more special and subsequently can be percieved as better.

when I'm feeling depressed, a small part of me... enjoys it.
A beautiful depression. For a long time I've combatted the simple idea that depression is bad. I believe to have happiness you must have sadness. People always say or think depression is this horrible dark cloud that looms over and brings nothing but negativity, but many times I enjoy feeling sad or melancholy or or being in a state of depression because it allows for a different perspective and simply allows you to feel real - kind of like "Hurt" (I prefer sadness and melancholy or even despair over a numbness, I've experienced them all and being numb is by far the worst, you feel nothing, that's when you want to die, because you can't feel anything. And the loss of feel and more- concious understanding of your loss of the ability to feel anything is where you want to end it. You become so sad in a completely numb way that you can't be sad, you can't be happy, you can't feel pain, you can't experience joy. ) I am a strong believer that the people and individuals who have gone through the most pain in their life, the most darkest and saddest of times are also the same people who can experience the strongest joys and most beautiful moments. To me I take the gloom and depression of times (which I don't mind) as well as those beautiful moments of wonders and joys. I prefer the calming waters and the rough seas over the vast ocean of steadily rocking single Serial 104 Blue color waves with no storms or palm trees in sight.

Furthermore some of the most beautiful and wonderous creations come from that melancholic nature within me. And I know many others would agree, if not most. That negativity, whether a soft reflective sadness or a bittering affliction can spawn beautiful things in this world as well as in my mind- in me.

It's all about a balance, I want to experience both spectrums.

Some people have a very serious depression and for that I like to say in no way do I mean to imply that it is this wondrous thing. Simply that I hate how people are so narrow-minded on how it can only be bad, it can only be a negative.


P.S. It's kind'ove how I can recieve incredible peace and joy with a feeling nothing short of being absoultely content when you look at something so small and minute but it makes you feel so wonderful and warm inside, that moment. The last autumn leaf clinging to it's barer before the next uninviting wind carresses it so persuasively from what it's known it's whole life, how can you not feel pity for it? Imagine, giant oak trees going through what they've known a hundred times before, bruised limbs all bare except for one in the less of the thicket, it holds the last leaf, alone and scared. It in your sight, although small, showing the last free movement of the tree, more eratic and chaotic as if fearful and panicking thefore. The limbs swaying, calm, but the leaf it is alone and therefore you sympathize with it's situation, you take heed to it's dilema. So you sit down and watch it as it fights for it's place against usurpers and "persuayers", rooting for it's only known desire, to continue what it knows. And after time has passed with you sitting watching the majestic battle of nature's course, you start to rise to leave and as you do it moves with you, breaking off fluttering and gliding through the air as if it knew what it was doing all along. It joined and followed in your display of moving on through life's course. You smile at the tranquil moment you were so priveledged to witness, and you take comfort that it was you alone who was offered such, and if not you alone, you alone who took what was offered. Another wind passes round your body, ruffling your hair and so you move with it as did the leaf. ... Then later that night you realize it was the death of the leaf, your are taken aback and in a small way mourn for the leaf. However then upon your mourning and the depth of thinking that comes with such feelings and emotions, you come to the more powerful and in ending positive realization, the leaf's death was it's greatest adventure.

Most friends of mine simply cannot, actually all cannot experience that unless I point it out them and even then if they havn't already say "Your gay", "Your an idiot", "Wow, your so ____". And that's fine, that's the way I am, that's the way they are, and the truth is it used to cause me some of the most saddest and tearing pain I have ever experienced, the fact that I am alone in my thoughts, ways, ideas, and paths, the way I see things. Although it doesn't bother me at all these days, because although I experience the most sad, I also experience the most wonderful. And so conversely they don't understand how such trivial things can make me so sad, and throw me into a blackness of my mind whirling and spiraling through thought after thought of tragedy and cruelty, and the absolute bitterness of the world. Such -- timeout, I wanted to give another example and probably speak more on the matter, after all I feel deeply about the issue, alas though my friend needs me for somehting and so I cannot finish. Of course I can't come back to it because my train of thought, ... different track~

peace~


Addition: okay, I got back quick, all i really wanted to say in summation besides an example for the minute negative butterfly spiral is: In general I think like in every other face of life it is a balance that must be reached for optimal living, now that will never be reached but that is what I strive for. Feeling "sad" or any other negativity can be a good thing. You need to have the balance of both spectrums for all things.
 

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I don't like sad stuff, but I seem to gravitate to it.
Most of my friends have sad stories about their pasts, or are living out those sad stories right now. I think I'm attracted to the idea of helping them out. I always kinda imagine them leaning on me for support, and want to help out. d: I'm attracted to the idea of making them happy, as well as forming a closer relationship with that person.
At the same time, even if a story has a happy ending, I always think of how it's gonna end up bad in ten or twenty years.
:/ Romantic comedies stopped amusing me because of that, it sucks.
 

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Even tho i never told anyone, so this is a personality cafe exclusive
my favorite movie for a lil minute now has been vanilla sky.
i dont know if that movie is sad or not but like how it make me feel at the end.
so all yall keep that between me and u!
 

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I am attracted to the melancholic.
In the game: Metroid Prime 2: Echoes, I loved being on Dark Aether.
 

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I definitely join the ones who said they are attracted by sad things! A place where I find myself quite comfortable... like someone who learnt how to move in his/her room with the light off as he/she knows it by heart!
 

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I'm attracted to duality more than sad things alone.

I think what attracts me to sad endings or seeing a person's scars is that it seems that people want to deny the sadder things in life. If we don't talk about it, it can't hurt us. When I see a person's more vulnerable side, I see a more complete and human picture. Suffering is a part of life and can't be denied. The more you hurt, the greater capacity for joy.

exactly my view. I love talking to people about what they like and want to do, but I want to know more about where they've been, what they're holding onto... what makes them human. I think it is the best way to really get to know someone. And it is the hardest, because then you are truly vulnerable.

I think sad stories without happing endings, whether fiction or non fiction allow me to get a grasp on reality in the comfort of my own home. You realise that it is part of the human condition to feel and experience all sorts of things.
yeaaah I feel the same way.

I used to actually think about Why was it I seemed attracted to sad stories and sad people lol... maybe because I'm also a bit depressing haha. But yeah I liked stories that seemed more realistic instead of the happily ever after endings. I thought I was a bit strange/depressing for liking tragic stories so much and being attracted to the dark things (hence why I also like horror movies/games for the crazy stories).

I can relate to what most people said on this thread.. sometimes I feel like I enjoy seeking those with problems and helping them if I can.. strange. Makes me sound so evil/manipulating haha. Idunno , it's just a natural attraction I have, like it seems the sad things always seem to be more interesting and the best (tragic tales and such compared to the happy ones).
 

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I think I am attracted to it, in a way. I see beauty in it, because it's real - just like happiness. What I can't stand are all the stupid, fluffy completely unbelievable happy movies or stories. Not because happy endings are bad, but because they're just so sugary that it's completely fake. Life's just not like that...

I also tend to be attracted to people in life who have tragic stories to tell. Partly because I like it when someone is willing to be vulnerable in front of me, because I know it means they're truly opening up to me. They aren't afraid to be human and they're okay with letting me see it. It's as real as you can get, and... Yeah. Plus, I've gone through a lot of bad crap in my life and I know how lonely it can be. I know that trying to deal with certain things on your own can be devastating, so I try to be there for people, because it's horrible when you don't have anyone to be there for you.

I guess I just like letting people know they're not alone. I felt and tend to feel, extremely alone... And I know I hate it, so I don't want anyone else to have to feel the same thing.
 

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I think in a lot of ways sadder things simply feel more real than something that's been forced to have a happy ending. Perhaps because happiness can be experienced almost passively, turning off your thoughts and simply being in the moment, while pain forces you to experience it fully and so just ends leaving a much stronger impression on your psyche. The other issue in fiction being, of course, that often times the happy ending is what you expect, so an unhappy ending is more interesting simply by virtue of being different. The happy ending you can discard afterward as what you knew would happen through the whole story, whereas the sad / disappointing / darker ending forces you to experience it more viscerally and leaves a much deeper impression.

In people, I think that those who have experienced real pain in their lives are somehow changed by it and gain a greater understanding of the world and of each other through it. It becomes easier to connect with them because they don't have the problem that some people who have never experienced anything like real depression of simply discarding that type of experience in someone else.

So, I guess that pain forces you to change and grow, while happiness indicates that everything is perfectly fine and there is no need to challenge anything. Maybe that's why it seems so much more interesting and some of us have a tendency to romanticize it a bit. Deeper than that, though, sometimes being able to feel deep sadness is what reminds you that you're human and that your passions are real. Without a bit of it here and there, life can almost begin to feel a bit shallow...or maybe that's just me. Or maybe it's just a yin/yang thing where to experience one fully you have to experience the other fully as someone else said.
 

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with all honesty i'm attracted to sad things.. It feels great making others smile or happy or sayin hey your gorgeous or you're so smart and cool ( i mean everything btw) ppl especially infp (like myself) tend to not value themselves as they should.
 

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I'm very much so attracted to sad things, especially really melancholic music. Not sure how to explain it, but I love the tragic beauty in things like an old cemetery, or a really sad song.
 

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Anyone else feels that a small part of them "enjoys" being sad or depressed, though?
I'm exactly the same. It seems very odd but I sometimes indulge in my melancholy.
I also love any book, film or piece of music that can make me cry and will sometimes seek that experience out. Maybe I am a little crazy haha
 
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