Attracted to sad things....?

3754 Views 20 Replies 18 Participants Last post by crazitaco, Mar 22, 2012

Gabrielle Johnson

Discussion Starter · Mar 21, 2012

I've been noticing in myself lately this obsession with sad depressing things around me. I don't know why things and people that are broken or upset really intrigue me. Do other Infp's go through intense phases of reflective introspection where they see the world around them as crappy and sad and just a holding cell for the abyss of nothingness(a bit dramatic)? :crazy:

"the intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. we have created a society that honors the servent and has forgotten the gift."

Reactions: 4

1 - 20 of 21 Posts

ItsRelative

· #2 · Mar 21, 2012

Yes sometimes, and i see it as natural cycle of consciousness, meaning i sense life in it as much as in positive things, can't have one without the other and holding back on sad things interferes with natural flow and could make you chronically sad in the end

So let's enjoy the abyss of nothingness while waiting flow of fullness that comes after

Reactions: 1

kaleidoscope

· #3 · Mar 21, 2012

Oh god, where do I start...

Sad things is what I find most beautiful in life. It's something I'm so drawn to, it can be quite shocking to some. It overwhelms me in such a positive way though, I find my heart swelling and this need to reach out to the person suffering. This is not to say I enjoy seeing a person suffer, in fact quite the opposite, it makes me feel a lot of distress and this urge to help them overcome it. Of the people I'm friends with though, I think there's only one or two that are well adjusted. It's hard to explain.

When it happens to me, it's even worse. Say something negative happened, I replay it in my mind over and over again, just to bask in the sorrow I'm experiencing. I don't seek drama, in fact I quite despise it, and I don't try to induce negative events at all, but when they do happen, I fully embrace them. I'm such a type four, it's not even funny. Boring, mundane life events don't hold a candle to raw, intimate, intense emotions. If I'm browsing PerC, I'd much rather be on a venting thread, than on the happy one.

Ironically, I'm one of those bubbly/happy/smiley people you encounter all the time. I'm not sure what this says about me, if I'm embracing the negative to balance out the positive in me maybe?

See less See more

Reactions: 5

illicit iridescence

· #4 · Mar 21, 2012

Gabrielle Johnson said:
Do other Infp's go through intense phases of reflective introspection where they see the world around them as crappy and sad and just a holding cell for the abyss of nothingness(a bit dramatic)? :crazy:

They do, and sometimes they explode over it. Though that's mostly about the world, not about themselves.

I myself have a thing with sadness as well.

kaleidoscope said:
I replay it in my mind over and over again, just to bask in the sorrow I'm experiencing. I don't seek drama, in fact I quite despise it, and I don't try to induce negative events at all, but when they do happen, I fully embrace them.

Yah, it's a lil sumthin like that. It's not like I enjoy seeing people suffer, it's not sadism, it's just, I don't know. A part of life? Though I do feel the instinct to help out, I know it's not always possible. Sometimes things just are.

Reactions: 1

RustyChameleon

· #5 · Mar 21, 2012

yes, sad things make me feel and when someone I like is sad it's like my whole soul fills up with warmth and love to give to that person, to make them feel better.

da_gobbo

· #6 · Mar 21, 2012

i wouldnt say i enjoy sadness but maybe sadness i ca. do something about yes. because then i can try to help that sadness go away. sadness i cant do anything about tends to make me feel compassionate but also a bit awkward and uncomfortable because when i see someone whos sad i want to help.

Blanco

· #7 · Mar 21, 2012

"sad is happy for smart people."

This was from an episode of Doctor Who (the first one with the Weeping Angels). I forget the name of the girl who said it, but it resonated with me.

So, yeah.

Reactions: 1

okaydrifter

· #8 · Mar 21, 2012

i used to think sad things were above happy things (angsty teenager).

i don't think that anymore. i'm a bit older now and see that i was only ever looking to be understood, relate to something.

happy things can be just as substantial (or sometimes moreso) than sad things, but if you look at too many sources of "only happy" things, you start to feel like you can't relate, you need to find something that's a little sad and broken like you to feel like you're not completely alone.

i like happy things, colorful things, laughs, sunshine, peaceful things... but if i'm around too many people or artworks or surroundings that are obnoxiously "SUNSHINE LOLLIPOPS AND RAINBOWS" and i'm like "okay... but what about like... the darker things too, the things that scare me?" "NOPE JUST SUNSHINE AND LOLLIPOPS"
... then i think i start to feel a little scared and alone. so yeah.

BALANCE
understanding
blah

i don't like being miserable all the time, haha. it's just a natural talent of mine.

See less See more

Reactions: 1

IcarusDreams

· #9 · Mar 21, 2012

Despite the difficulties of everyday living, I honestly consider myself an extremely happy and fulfilled person-yet I am always drawn to sadness and pathos (whether in music, arts, books, etc.) because they are emotions that I am very much in tune too. I like feeling compassion and relating to other people's miseries, and i need, I LIKE to cry. I rather read a minor, "shallow" romantic classic novella with a tragic ending than a supposedly great philosophical masterpiece. I like my heart's passions to be moved while I read, and not just to earn more knowledge or learn another story for its own sake. I love tragedy, and feel a stronger sense of conviction for being empathic and understanding of others when I read about somebody not being happy/dying/etc. due to injustice/misunderstanding. The music I am drawn too can be extremely funny and light hearted, but also very brooding, sad, melancholic, and utterly romantic. I love sadness, even as I happily revel in living my own adventurous life journey, where things are usually not too dark, and there's always hope.

See less See more

Knight_In_Rags

· #10 · Mar 22, 2012

Gabrielle Johnson said:
I've been noticing in myself lately this obsession with sad depressing things around me. I don't know why things and people that are broken or upset really intrigue me. Do other Infp's go through intense phases of reflective introspection where they see the world around them as crappy and sad and just a holding cell for the abyss of nothingness(a bit dramatic)? :crazy:

INFP - Jung Type Descriptions
Exactly why we INFPs love the rain.

Reactions: 2

Knight_In_Rags

· #11 · Mar 22, 2012

*Accidentally double posted*

Knight_In_Rags

· #12 · Mar 22, 2012

*Accidentally posted*

da_gobbo

· #13 · Mar 22, 2012

and the lovely fresh smell when it stops

Reactions: 1

Staffan

· #14 · Mar 22, 2012

I like sad operas, movies etc, although it makes me feel a bit creepy sometimes, like I'm feeding on other's misery. But it's usually the fictional stuff. I don't respond as strongly to actual events.

Rainbow

· #15 · Mar 22, 2012

an intuitive mind should be able to reach the ends of the questions. trust me, the world is not an abyss.

i do like sad songs, if they help me cry, because sometimes i cant cry on anyone's shoulder.
i like movies that are emotionally honest, and have sadness, so i can feel with the characters.

Reactions: 2

this cosmic dance

· #16 · Mar 22, 2012

as a kid i was pretty melancholy and attracted to sadness, but as i grew up my personality emerged from its shell and now i see the beauty in all things both happy and sad. what allows me to do that is that i really believe in maintaining a balance and accepting that balance as inevitable......from the worst events can emerge beautiful creations and conversely, beautiful events can create sad outcomes. its a cycle that i've almost come to just go with and appreciate.

Reactions: 2

Nucky

· #17 · Mar 22, 2012

Knight_In_Rags said:
INFP - Jung Type Descriptions
Exactly why we INFPs love the rain.

That sounds like it was written by an xSxJ who was in a bad relationship with an INFP.

Reactions: 1

Sily

· #18 · Mar 22, 2012

Nucky said:
That sounds like it was written by an xSxJ who was in a bad relationship with an INFP.

You Sir are a genius!

Thank you!

The description is too negative for my liking. I'm not into the negative.

Peter

· #19 · Mar 22, 2012

Gabrielle Johnson said:
I've been noticing in myself lately this obsession with sad depressing things around me. I don't know why things and people that are broken or upset really intrigue me. Do other Infp's go through intense phases of reflective introspection where they see the world around them as crappy and sad and just a holding cell for the abyss of nothingness(a bit dramatic)? :crazy:

You´re being a typical INFP :happy: That's not a bad thing, it's just something Fi - Ne likes to do.

Imagine how much you would be thinking if you'd focus on things that work and go smoothly. Not that much at all. Your brain is happiest when it can do what you do. Just don't let it get to you.

Gabrielle Johnson said:
"the intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. we have created a society that honors the servent and has forgotten the gift."

This quote is interesting from the point of view that it assumes that in the past things were different.

In reality, the iNtuitive mind is valued more now than in the past. Anything high tech is mainly controlled/led by iNtuitives. In the past there was much less high tech and things changed really slooooowly. The further back in time you go, the more boring life must have been for iNtuitives.

under skies

· #20 · Mar 22, 2012

I would not consider myself attracted or intrigued by "sad or broken" things or people. In general, I am a fairly upbeat and optimistic person. I'm put off by negativity. I tend to feel very strongly for people who are clearly down and out, but I can also become very frustrated with people who insist on always viewing the world through a negative filter.

What you talk about makes things seem very black and white, as if the world is either a dark or beautiful place and a person is either happy or sad. The reality of it is that there is a lot of grey area demanding to be acknowledged. There are a lot of sad things in the world, and those things should be taken seriously and maybe even should stir action from us, but there are just as many things to be ecstatic about at the same time--if you choose to see them (sometimes you have to go looking for them).

I really like what @this cosmic dance said about balance. I think it's importance to have both "sad" and "happy" things. As she wrote, "from the worst events can emerge beautiful creations and conversely, beautiful events can create sad outcomes."

/That being said, I don't think there's necessarily a link between being drawn to sadness and a belief that there is no one meaning to life. I think you can believe and accept that idea as fact without having an existential crisis. Then again, "abyss of nothingness" is a vague phrase, so I don't really known at what point you were getting, precisely.

See less See more

Reactions: 1

1 - 20 of 21 Posts

This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.