[Transcendence]

I reside mostly in the ENTJ forum, but more recently I've tried to integrate to the NF forum, but I always get so frustrated because everyone is so goody-two-shoes.

And the ENFJ forum.... ugh, everyone is so caring and gentle, it's almost annoying. In fact, it is annoying.

Do cynical and/or ENFJs that don't fit the mold even exist? I know @Jawz and I are more alike on these terms, but come on, there has to be more of us.

Where are all the bad ENFJs?

 

[Happy about Nothing.]

I reside mostly in the ENTJ forum, but more recently I've tried to integrate to the NF forum, but I always get so frustrated because everyone is so goody-two-shoes.

And the ENFJ forum.... ugh, everyone is so caring and gentle, it's almost annoying. In fact, it is annoying.

Do cynical and/or ENFJs that don't fit the mold even exist? I know @Jawz and I are more alike on these terms, but come on, there has to be more of us.

Where are all the bad ENFJs?

Is all the squeaky clean making you feel dirty in comparison? This world is full enough of dull, draining cynicism and it aint' pretty.

 

[Transcendence]

Is all the squeaky clean making you feel dirty in comparison? This world is full enough of dull, draining cynicism and it aint' pretty.

It's just that I don't think the ENFJs pose the important questions. They don't analyze.
The INFJ forum is full of introspective questions. People there acknowledge their dark side.

But here? Nothing.

 

[Happy about Nothing.]

It's just that I don't think the ENFJs pose the important questions. They don't analyze.
The INFJ forum is full of introspective questions. People there acknowledge their dark side.

But here? Nothing.

We had a confession thread awhile back. As I recall there weren't many confessions. If you want, you can open back up, perhaps that will encourage others to post. I analyze all the time, but it takes a flame to my Fe to get me to do it out loud. ENFJs sit and wait for someone to take risks and usually follow suit. I've noticed most of us like to test the water before jumping in.

 

[Transcendence]

We had a confession thread awhile back. As I recall there weren't many confessions. If you want, you can open back up, perhaps that will encourage others to post. I analyze all the time, but it takes a flame to my Fe to get me to do it out loud. ENFJs sit and wait for someone to take risks and usually follow suit. I've noticed most of us like to test the water before jumping in.

It's not about confessions.

What about all the darkness inside us? INFJ and ENFJs have the same functions, but why are they so much more introspective than us? Why don't we ask questions, start threads concerning our problems, our emotions?

Most of the stuff here is just trivial or about others. It's so weird.

 

[Happy about Nothing.]

It's not about confessions.

What about all the darkness inside us? INFJ and ENFJs have the same functions, but why are they so much more introspective than us? Why don't we ask questions, start threads concerning our problems, our emotions?

Most of the stuff here is just trivial or about others. It's so weird.

Our dominant function is extroverted, we derive energy from the external world....from interpersonal interaction. Presence, energy. We just generally don't get the same satisfaction from online forums. That's why there are less of us here, our functions demand more extroversion.

Also, they have tertiary introverted thinking and we have tertiary extroverted sensing. Extroverted sensing is also a function that relishes in the outside world. Introverted thinking muses about ideas like introverted feeling muses about values. Sifting them through an internal system. Introverted thinking is our inferior function, our weakest.

 

[Transcendence]

Our dominant function is extroverted, we derive energy from the external world....from interpersonal interaction. Presence, energy. We just generally don't get the same satisfaction from online forums. That's why there are less of us here, our functions demand more extroversion.

Also, they have tertiary introverted thinking and we have tertiary extroverted sensing. Extroverted sensing is also a function that relishes in the outside world. Introverted thinking muses about ideas like introverted feeling muses about values. Sifting them through an internal system. Introverted thinking is our inferior function, our weakest.

You could blame it on functions, but you could also blame it on laziness.
Anyone can think, philosophize but not without effort.

 

[Happy about Nothing.]

You could blame it on functions, but you could also blame it on laziness.
Anyone can think, philosophize but not without effort.

....not if it doesn't bring any kind of satisfaction? That's my point.

INFJs because of their functions are more likely to derive satisfaction from that sort of thing more consistently, hence, it doesn't take as much effort.

 

[Hycocritical truth teller]

I know one
-likes to annoy people
-cynical as hell
-sarcastic
-pranking people
-jerk


...but still can get very caring - i think he's just joker lol

 

[Transcendence]

I know one
-likes to annoy people
-cynical as hell
-sarcastic
-pranking people
-jerk


...but still can get very caring - i think he's just joker lol

That's me! I still care deeply about people, I look out for them, but it doesn't mean I can't flash my (non-existent) tits and break the rules! You know, sometimes being a little mean is fun!

But the ENFJs don't do outrageous things. Makes me feel a little ashamed xd

 

[Tyche]

Just because our deepest, darkest feelings aren't posted all over the forum for you to read (though I guarantee most of us have at least a couple posts that qualify), doesn't mean they don't exist or that we ignore them.

 

[Transcendence]

You guys have totally misunderstood me. xd

 

[petitpèlerin]

I think one of my close friends in high school was an unhealthy ENFJ. Therefore I'm having a hard time a) typing her, and b) understanding ENFJ. She was phenomenally intelligent, very charismatic, and was indeed tuned into the world of people, with exceptional insight, loved to learn, loved fiction and poetry and movies, loved to share all these things with her friends and her younger siblings, and in her finer moments she was absolutely brilliant; one of the most talented people I've ever known. But somehow it always turned back on herself. She was often sarcastic and narcissistic and manipulative. She would imagine that people did things in order to affect her, as if her friends' worlds really did revolve around her. She secretly believed that all her guy friends wanted to be with her, including her friends' boyfriends. She lost friends one by one by one as they each slowly realized that the good truly wasn't worth the bad. At her worst (in the context of her toxic relationship), if she wanted things to be a certain way and they weren't going that way, she would sulk and manipulate the situation to the point of completely disrupting the whole group's plans and good time. When she was with new friends she wanted to impress she would be downright rude to her old faithful friends. Things like that. I know it's unhealthy but does it sound like unhealthy ENFJ?

 

[Transcendence]

Well it doesn't sound like me.

 

[SilentScream]

Dude ... instead of hatin' and judgin' .. do something about it.

You're like the 4th or 5th person to make this, this place is too nice and rosy and blah blah comment.

Well .. life is fucking hard enough as it is and this is a place where I come to learn and get away from it all.

Actually, I personally prefer the safe haven kind of feel to the ENFJ section compared to the everything sucks attitude of other forums.

This forum is what you want it to be. If you feel the need to get the ENFJs to talk about darker stuff, or be critical, or analyse stuff .. then there's this button called create thread, so what's stopping you

There may be fewer responses but that's because there are at most 4-5 ENFJs active on PerC at a given time.

Personally, I'm 31 and tired of critically thinking and posting my 'deeper' thoughts .. There's no point. No one gets it anyways.

A few posts on an online forum may endear me to this community.. but it will not change the world.

As for other sections, there are more people there plus younger people ... I'd rather go out there and actually do stuff ... as I have on the past... When I read philosophical epics on this forum, I just thank and move on ... I guess I'm jaded.

PS. I really meant what I said about this forum becoming what you want it to become.

"Build it and they will come" sort of thing ... you get the idea.

 

[formal riot]

Im sorry but I find it hard enough to get dark and meaningful with my friends, let alone with randoms on the internet, but if I had to, I would turn to them first. Also Im agreeing with JAWZ on the whole make the thread what you want it to be. No one here is necessarily stoping you from creating your own threads.

Something also kind of irks me with the whole "I want to see more jaded people" attitude. Unless you respond more positively too tough love however Im not sure that's part of an ENFJ's nature so yeah that would be a tad bit more rare in these neck of the woods.

Im still new so maybe I just haven't grown weary of sunshine lollipops and rainbows.

 

[SilentScream]

Im still new so maybe I just haven't grown weary of sunshine lollipops and rainbows.

I know where @Samhain is coming from too [sort of]. He's a core Enneagram 5 ---- therefore the penchant for darkness and even macabre is coming from there.

ENFJ's come in all flavours of lolipops btw ... even bitter ones - and that's ok

 

[formal riot]

@Jawz Im not saying that to much sweetness wouldn't get a it stale after a while, it just seems very odd to say there are to many kind people in this room, when normally that's what one would strive for I assume.

I mean yes if your looking darker topics here and there arent any then ya that would get old, but instead of lashing out (way to over dramatized I know just wanted to use that phrase) at peoples characters and calling them annoying, the easier solution seems to be just create your own. I mean I probably wont create one myself for the before mentioned reason yet I would be happy to comment and respond to others.

 

[SilentScream]

@Jawz Im not saying that to much sweetness wouldn't get a it stale after a while, it just seems very odd to say there are to many kind people in this room, when normally that's what one would strive for I assume.

I mean yes if your looking darker topics here and there arent any then ya that would get old, but instead of lashing out (way to over dramatized I know just wanted to use that phrase) at peoples characters and calling them annoying, the easier solution seems to be just create your own. I mean I probably wont create one myself for the before mentioned reason yet I would be happy to comment and respond to others.

I think we're kinda doing what @Samhain was sort of intending ... it's just that he became the brunt of it intentionally, or unintentionally.

I think he wanted to provoke debate ---- and there we have it.

Honestly, his thread reminds me of mine when I made one out of frustration about ENFJ's on PerC as well - so I can relate to where he's coming from.

I really do want to discuss heavier topics with ENFJ's ---- but for some reason those threads fizzle out faster than you can blink. I've made 1000's of long, well researched posts in this section .... and have pretty much never gotten a response. There's just not enough traffic here.

People here would MUCH rather discuss ENFJ+INFP love affairs as opposed to anything else in the world. Those threads go on for months.

Sometimes it feels like that's the sole purpose of this section :dry:

 

[formal riot]

@Jawz well discussing love affairs defiantly isn't what I came here for at all, it actually was debate and discussion involving interaction between personality types... well that and personality matching to fictional characters but I digress, nothing wrong with debates. Again most of what I believe comes from what 2 days on this site, so most of my arguments probably aren't grounded with any real bases at all.

As for the heavier topics, perhaps Im still not entirely sure what is meant by that. Discussing things such as death? I read on the ESFJ forum a thread where they tried to justify why they may not be liked, is that a darker topic? because both of those things would be interesting, especially the later. Hell it could even be useful in finding and improving your character, however I wouldn't consider either of those things to be dark.

When I hear dark I think how can I best break and demoralize an ESTP or something along those lines, that I wouldnt be interested in and I'm not sure why one would.

I also guess I would be wrong if I said there were better ways to provoke a discussion because alas here we are