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"'Protecting oneself, one protects others. Protecting others, one protects oneself'"

One of the many roles us infjs are attuned to perhaps more than any other type is the role of protector. I think this is due to our desire to want to help and save people, however this desire alone is not always enough. In order to protect those that we hold dear or anyone for that matter who needs it we require skills.

So the purpose of this thread is to question what it means to be a protector and what skills/abilities a person needs to develop to be successful at this role. As always any input is appreciated.
 

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I have always thought of that title of protector. I have always liked the title counselor more than protector, but I do know where the term protector does come from. I think protector comes from when an INFJ is a healthy person. Which does not happen often because we have so much "stuff" to deal with. When we get past our introversion I think we grow into the protector, so I believe the thread title "becoming a protector" spot on.
 

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You know, when I first saw that INFJ was titled "The Protector" I wasn't really convinced that it was right. Most of the time I feel like I'm not fit to protect people. It never would occur to me to call myself that.

But, then I explored it, and what it really means, and I guess I can see how I fit into the role. It's not a fierceness thing, unless something/someone I am passionate about gets attacked in anyway.
 

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The problem with being a Protector is that we often don't know what to do with ourselves, our common skills mainly comprise of social balming and cementing relations, empathy and communication. But can you think of any jobs that utilize these skills in the right way, and don't leave you with a vacuum where your heart used to be?
 

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Mend wounds, while stabilizing foundations to prevent further structure failure. Giving possibility to rebuild stronger.
 
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Originally I thought that protector was most suitable to label me and other ENFJs instead of the "giver".... I think being a protector is a characteristic that goes beyond keeping someone physically safe (which I believe that job is more suitable for an ISTP, for their ability to work something about immediately)

Being a protector means that you have the capacity that people near that person will feel secure, loved and cared about.. Protection is not always tangible. Protection means that you know that you will do ANYTHING for that person.. That you become a superhero/psychotherapist when is needed.

People are simply drawn to you INFJ (including myself) because we know behind that big huge wall of Ni, there is a tender and care giving Fe which is willing to listen and take care of whoever is in need.
 

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I have found that it is very important to understand that one needs to understand when one can be a protector and when one can't; even if, one wants so badly to be. Sometimes you can help someone because they let you; other times someone wants help but will not let you. To know the difference is of utmost importance. If a person will not let you, you will have to walk away...hard to do, I know. Also, we are only guides. This is how we protect. All of this is just my opinion.
 
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'tutor of inermis' - i have always been a protector, back when i was what i used to be i wouldve felt blessed to have been able to die protecting someone to make up for who i was and how weak i was

and in truth i feel the same, to protect, to save those who deserve to be saved, the one standing between the victim and the culprit. that will always be my role, the gentle carer and the unforgiving defender

to become the protector one must have sharp observational skills and be able to effectively analyse and read body language, they must also understand that defending someone may be as simple as helping out a friend who is being verbally bullied etc, they must have empathy, enough so to turn our thoughts into actions, i literally feel my empathy and i believe it will result in a shortened lifespan because of its negative health effects but it helps me feel for people

a protector must... well obviously they will have to have some combat or linguistical skills that superceed most average humans so that they can stop conflicts and not just be a useless meatshield

a protector must be able to read someones personality so that we can be prepared for an engagement at any point

there are many other points but i cannot remember them at this time
 

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A useless meatshield indeed.

Empaths can empathise, a useful trait in itself, yet often overlooked
Some of us have "masks" for every occasion, in my own case, I split the evil in my heart into more than one personality in my own head, resulting in me being more than one person at any time, 3 me's thinking simultaneously to solve a problem.
Some can do both, absorbing emotions and thoughts, then turning that into a mask, fitting in without ever being noticed.
 

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In terms of skills, I can think of none much more important than listening. Really listening, not waiting to speak. I think it's the first step to true empathy and I'm always amazed at how many people thank me for just listening to them ramble. Sometimes I didn't have anything to say in return, but I've found many people don't even need that.
 
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