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I realized something recently and I'd like to hear if you made similar experiences. I noticed that there is a special connection between Fi users. When both let down their guard and connect through Fi and dont let their ego get to talk theres something like a authenticity zone created - a special connection between the two where theres no misinterpreting. There are no hidden agendas or anything. I'm not saying that hidden agendas need to be ill-willed or have necessarily the motive of hiding something, but they always distort the essence of what you're expressing. I'm not saying that Fe users can't be real with each other or whatever, but Fi is the Authenticity function - its sees through aaaaaaall the ego bullshit and looks at where your emotions are coming from. Its very MDMA like (what ties in with my theory that MDMA doesn't create fake feelings but makes the user just very aware of them; its boosting their Fi basically lol) when Fi users let down their guard. The important hing is that they both need to be on the same level. They need to both feel that the other one is really real and know that the other is too. This is obviously really vulnerable and involves a high level of both trust and self confidence I'm sure some people have barely ever experienced since most people are too caught up in there ego to be able to interact without hidden motives, just suggesting their real feelings and thoughts instead of making them clear. Again, I'm not saying Fe users cant connect really, but it'll feel different, because they use it unconsciously. You also dont need to even have it high in your stacking, I had this with people of all sorts of types as long as they had it well enough developed (like healthy EFPs or ISJs). If you didn't understand the feeling I'm trying to explain yet, this quote describes it well I think: "I see your eyes look through my soul, don't be surprised this all I know"
 

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I know what you mean but I disagree that it's always good like you make it seem. There can still be misinterpreting because of the other functions and different motivations or just general character. Misinterpreting things can come from one's own expectations, upbringing, experiences, as well as type, because the different functions create a different mode of experiencing things. For example, we had another thread about ESFP - INFP relationships that illustrated that disparity pretty well including the ego that gets in the way for both. Communication is more than just one function and usually N-S differences have a bigger impact on that. I think you are talking about a certain acceptance of the self that comes when talking with other Fi types, but I think that only goes truly well like you describe when the values of the people align, otherwise it can be quite a frustrating experience.
I've had good experiences like that with INTJs mostly, then ENTJ and an ESFP friend especially at the beginning of our relationship before the common relationship dynamic shows its ugly face.
 

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Imagine Fi as a metaphysical heart that overlays the physical. When Fi opens up this metaphysical heart expands to include its environment, and in doing this reads the energetic properties in its field... So long as what is being read, is also open; expanded to include the other. They will know each other. This is the fundamental idea behind the flower of life. That all is one, when fear is no longer.
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Discussion Starter #4
Imagine Fi as a metaphysical heart that overlays the physical. When Fi opens up this metaphysical heart expands to include its environment, and in doing this reads the energetic properties in its field... So long as what is being read, is also open; expanded to include the other. They will know each other. This is the fundamental idea behind the flower of life. That all is one, when fear is no longer.
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Yup, thats basically what I meant. Probably put better than I did. @Red Panda: I think I know what you mean. There are moments where everything seems aligned but they're just that - short moments. This authentic connection is real but it can be dangerous because everybody is still an individual and is obviously having their unique own experience and you shouldn't assume too much "being on the exact same page" because of this connection. And yea similar values are of course necessary but Fi believes that at its core everyones values are similar - which is why healthy Fi user, as long as they are communicating effectively, rarely disagree on much.
 

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And yea similar values are of course necessary but Fi believes that at its core everyones values are similar - which is why healthy Fi user, as long as they are communicating effectively, rarely disagree on much.
I don't think this is true at all though. You can disagree with other Fi users about many things, don't forget that half the types have Fi, and everyone values different things or the same thing in fundamentally different ways. We've had several disagreements on this forum for example, between Fi users. Huge differences that translate to real disagreements. Fi doesn't mean a specific set of values, it's just a cognitive function that gives a certain framework in which the mind processes information. Basically, here you are projecting your own Fi in the discussion - you want to believe that all Fi users have similar values because that would bring you harmony, but it doesn't necessarily reflect reality. With that being said, I agree that each type tends to agree on many things with other people of the same type, at least when you strip down to the basics, but even then the big picture of it may be divisive. But between types with different function stack you can find a lot of differences.
 

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@drizzy lake

Hmm, very interesting. I hadn't thought of it before as being an Fi thing (always assumed it was an "N" thing), but this seems to be definitely true in my experience. I definitely connect with ISFPs, and sometimes I wondered where that connection came from. I really do think it is the Fi that I like in them (among other things).
 
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Edgelord
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I'm the real deal baby, no matter your dom function
 

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Hm, of course there is going to be individual differences, but I personally do connect easier with Fi-users. It it easier to explain things to them, because the methods of explanation just makes sense more. There is definitely a difference in regards to their value of Fi vs Te, but even with that difference, I’m more naturally in tune with their method of explanation than those who use Fe-Ti to communicate.

I don’t agree wih the authenticity portion of the post, because I don’t agree Fe being inauthentic, but I know what you are saying. And I do agree there is a connection. I think it’s easier to let my guard down with them, because their intentions just make more sense to us, because we speak the same language.
 
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Discussion Starter #9
I don’t agree wih the authenticity portion of the post, because I don’t agree Fe being inauthentic, but I know what you are saying. And I do agree there is a connection. I think it’s easier to let my guard down with them, because their intentions just make more sense to us, because we speak the same language.
Of course Fe isn't inauthentic (I don't think I said that in the post tho), but it makes a difference. They both have the objective of (authentic) self expression and making judgement based on emotional values - but Fi users do it differently from Fe users, obvioulsy, since it's a different function. Fe acts (=/=inauthentic) to judge and express, Fi feels. As everybody has and uses both functions, everbody does both. But one uses one function consciously and the other unconsciously. So between conscious Fi users there can be really profound connection felt without needing to say a word, when both 'feel their Fi align'. Fe users I'm sure can connect similarly but it'll feel differently and probably less profound/vulnerable because of it's nature of being an extroverted function. @Red Panda: Well, there's a reason why I said "as long as they are communicating effectively'' - forums ain't an example of that. lol I mean real life face to face, body to body interaction. Of couse they'll disagree but you'll notice they'll always be able to not just see but *feel* where the other is coming from when they're in this egoless, authenticity zone. Which is why, like you said, you should be careful to not assume too much 'alignment' necessarily because of the connection, because the very act of feeling where they're coming from shows that they are coming from somewhere else. And this is why this connection is so vulnerable (and requires love and trust on both sides) because you let somebody emphasize with the very place that you're coming from, completely mask off. I think I explained myself better now. lol
 

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Oh yes, definitely, and I was trying to explain that to you as well with Fi-Te. I suppose my explanation wasn't very clear, now that I read it. It's definitely true that there is a connection between Fi-users, and for me, even their explanation is easier to understand because of the use of Te. But I feel the less you say, the stronger the connection feels. It's quite interesting. And yes, I agree with what you are saying.

I find this very interesting:

Fe users I'm sure can connect similarly but it'll feel differently and probably less profound/vulnerable because of it's nature of being an extroverted function.
And you might be right. Thanks for the food for thought!
 
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With dom/aux Fi users, we either get along great or we clash like nobody's business. Depends.

I will say that when we click, it seems like we click much faster and I have an easier time letting my guard down and being vulnerable.
 

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@drizzy lake

I was thinking about this more, and I would be curious to know how your experience differs with Ti users (versus Fi users) because I find it to be very similar. I seem to find the same sort of authenticity zone with Tis, although the difference (and I am just guessing – haven’t thought it through that far) is usually that I value it more than they do. OR rather, than they express. Like, I need it more, maybe.
 
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Discussion Starter #14
@drizzy lake

I was thinking about this more, and I would be curious to know how your experience differs with Ti users (versus Fi users) because I find it to be very similar. I seem to find the same sort of authenticity zone with Tis, although the difference (and I am just guessing – haven’t thought it through that far) is usually that I value it more than they do. OR rather, than they express. Like, I need it more, maybe.
I would say it exactly like you. They have Fi too, so you can connect with them over it too. But like you say they value it less, differently. I guess its like the authenticity zone is there, but it'll feel like you value this connection more than they. It'll probably feel less vulnerable because of that and the authenticity zone'll feel, like, less stable? Or less strong. Its like they wont even recognize how you are "connecting your essences" or rather the profoundness of the connection - they'll feel it but value it differently. Your Fi recognizes that they value it differently and that kinda throws the deepness of the connection you feel off... if you feel what I mean lol @twirler
 

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With dom/aux Fi users, we either get along great or we clash like nobody's business. Depends.

I will say that when we click, it seems like we click much faster and I have an easier time letting my guard down and being vulnerable.
I second this post.

I can't say that there is anything inherently special with my connections to other Fi users vs non-Fi users beyond the quickness to getting to a nice plateau of comfort with each other. Unless I found one that was extremely similar to me, I think we would have the same problems and joys as I do with other types.
 
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