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Discussion Starter #1
I am an easy going girl :mellow:. I love to go out as long as I have the comfort of people I know around me. But I'm not good at the deciding on what to do part. I like to be with someone who can get up in the morning or call me up and say hey, lets go to a movie or lets go to the beach today or lets go bowling. I go crazy with someone that waits on me to find something to do or makes me make the decisions between option A or option B all the time. If I've come up with A and B and asked you what you think or like I have reached the end of my decision makeing skills and leave the rest to you please don't say I don't know you choose, I've already chosen the options :frustrating:. Anyone else hate making the final decisions?
 

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Not really, if a person is asking me I'm assuming they're cool with either or. I'm cool with either or, so I will randomly pick an option just to keep the showing moving. What I do hate though is being asked to make the final decision after I say it doesn't matter after they said it doesn't matter and then they don't like the option I went with. Almost like it wasn't a point to me saying anything at all. Then I'll just go along with whatever they want. :confused:
 

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I feel like when people tell me to "choose" they are sometimes just expecting me to tell them what they want. The only time making decisions really bothers me is when I'm being asked to make a decision by someone who has a stronger preference than I do, and, honestly, I usually just don't care that much and could be satisfied either way.
 

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If I don't care about the outcome of the decision, I really don't care. If I do care about and I decided to that I definitely wanted Mexican food over Italian, I'll say so. However, if the people I'm with don't make a decision, I do based on how I feel right then and there.

Then I start rushing people to implement my decision. I don't give them time to reconsider. I already gave them a chance to make a decision. I don't give them time to annoy me by changing their mind.
 

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I'm the exact same way.
I hate having to make decisions, especially when other people are involved like that.
When it comes to making plans and deciding what to do, I can't really be relied on at all.

Sometimes, when people try to get me to make the final decision something ends up coming up and I end up not being able to hang out at all.
And my "something ends up coming up" I mean I just break plans altogether and do nothing at all instead. Not so great.
 

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I'm a natural leader so I have no problems with decisions. In the same breath I like people who also have an opinion, at least from time to time, on what we do. Otherwise it's like having a dog on a leash.

I like to think that when I'm with people I can show them things they may never do on their own, but in the same breath they can possibly show me something as well. On the other hand, sometimes just seeing their personality at a place I'm already familiar with, can make me realize something new -- sort of like being with children at Christmas and how it changes everything to see their excitement.
 

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I don't really like making decisions but if no one around is willing to do so or can't be bothered then I'll make my own decision, They're free to tag along if they want.
 

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Discussion Starter #11
I feel like when people tell me to "choose" they are sometimes just expecting me to tell them what they want. The only time making decisions really bothers me is when I'm being asked to make a decision by someone who has a stronger preference than I do, and, honestly, I usually just don't care that much and could be satisfied either way.
That I get. I get so frustrated with my curren boyfriend because he literally asks me what HE likes....I mean who doesn't know what they like when they're out to ear, or in a store, or picking out clothes. I most reciently found out that his entire wordrobe was chosen by someone else. Who doesn't pick out their own clothes at 30 years old?!?!?:crazy:
 

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Discussion Starter #12
I'm the exact same way.
I hate having to make decisions, especially when other people are involved like that.
When it comes to making plans and deciding what to do, I can't really be relied on at all.QUOTE]

My problem is I don't care. I just don't care what we're doing. As long as we do something. So I want someone to just make the decision and lets go.
 

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Anyone else hate making the final decisions?

Not if I know that the other person(s) is going to follow along and not be a complainy bi***.
Most people say "Oh I don't care, whatever you want, you choose" then you choose and they make a face and say "Oh, not that [insert complainy bit**iness]*

I avoid making group decisions simply because people are annoying af. Nobody ever can get along, they always spend five thousand hours trying to agree on something, and that gives me anxiety. I prefer to be an adapter, meaning I'll do whatever they want even if I'm not excited to do that, just cause I'd rather avoid the endless arguing.

I remember being in college and I had this group of friends, 6 of us, and we had a monthly group date where we'd go for dinner & then a walk and sit in a park to chat. I always dreaded the week where plans needed to be made, because it would take them days, days!, to decide on a restaurant. And there was this guy who had to have his way or the highway, and if the group didn't choose the restaurant he wanted, he refused to show up, and by extension his best friend wouldn't come either, and in the end it would be 3-4 of us feeling sorry that the others didn't feel happy enough to come. Assholes, imo. I hated that dynamic so much.
I have found that people still operate like this. If there's a group, there's going to be endless arguing, and that's petty imo. I'm more interested in hanging out with the people than the actual place. I could go lie down under a bridge for all I care, I just want the people.

I like making the decisions for myself by myself. Living solo is the best feeling.

With my family... sigh... I'm usually the initiator of everything. My sister is a hardcore introvert who disappears for months at a time; my ISFJ father is anchored in his Si routines and never deviates. I'm the one who is usually bored af, so I want to do stuff and I call my father to ask is he wants to join me, he usually does, so I plan everything because it was my idea to begin with. With my sister, I must also do all the initiating and chasing, loooots of chasing involved, it's exhausting.

If someone asks what I want to do, I usually have a clear idea of what I want. Now here's the problem ----> A lot of times they don't like my answer.
So why do they ask then?! I don't get it! Frustrates me.

If someone asks me to choose the option and I say "I dunno", it's not cause I don't know, I totally know what I want to do by myself, I say I dunno because I'm trying to predict what they want to do so that my answer makes them happy; but I don't read minds, so it becomes "I dunno". I don't have any problems whatsoever with decision making when I'm by myself. I don't feel pressured to please anyone, and I know nobody will complain.
 

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I don't prefer it, but if I find something fun everyone will enjoy I will freaking crusade for it.

Umm paintballing in the woods? I'll campaign for that. Camping out, drinking beers, and grilling burgers. Psh I make decisions, but they are universally pretty tantalizing prospects!
 

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it depends. I can definitely get tired of always making the decisions, but I generally do like to have some control and am not up for just whatever someone else suggests most of the time.

what's really annoying is when someone refuses to make the choices, but then suggests that other people are selfish because they're always getting their way.... as if we can read their minds and are supposed to make their choices for them. :rolleyes:
 

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I never initiate activities (other than w/husband), however, I am always The Final Decision-Maker, on whether I want to participate, in another's idea of fun (and no I do not mind being in control). It's a very handy skill to have. Don't want to end up on some, god-forsaken planet, wishing I was back home, doing my own thing. Live and learn, live and learn.
 

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I leave decisions to my bro and to God, I just follow along because if I make my own decisions they're usually weird and inefficient.
 

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It's good. Do it more often.


I used to avoid it too, just to find out later I was usually the one with the better idea in mind than the one who decided.
 

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I struggle with this for sure. Not sure why, but I never really know what I want to do... I only know what I don't want to do. haha. Mostly I really, actually do NOT have a preference, and I think that is very hard for others to accept about me. My preference is almost always that THEY make the decision, so we have one. I have grown in that I will make decisions if no one else is willing, but usually they have stronger preferences than I do, so it's pointless.

ISTP and I are the worst ever at this. Neither of us can decide.
 
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