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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I need some ideas for a birthday gift and activities for my ISTJ friend in his 30s. What kinds of things do you find you like to do with friends on your birthday? I'm trying to plan a group activity but all I'm coming up with is food. I find that he is very particular about what he finds entertaining. Do ISTJs like surprises? Any ideas or comments are welcome. Thank you in advance!
 

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MOTM May 2011
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Oh no, no, no! Ignore Sela. SURPRISE him! Throw a big party with lots of people there--especially people that he doesn't know. Have plenty of foods that are difficult to eat without making a mess. Force him to do things that he has never done before, like trying new foods, or eating with chop sticks. And about half way through, bring out the karaoke machine and put him on center stage.

That should be a party he remembers for a long, long time. :evil grin:

muahahahahahahahahaha

/sarcasm:tongue:
 

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Oh no, no, no! Ignore Sela. SURPRISE him! Throw a big party with lots of people there--especially people that he doesn't know. Have plenty of foods that are difficult to eat without making a mess. Force him to do things that he has never done before, like trying new foods, or eating with chop sticks. And about half way through, bring out the karaoke machine and put him on center stage.

That should be a party he remembers for a long, long time. :evil grin:

muahahahahahahahahaha

/sarcasm:tongue:
:tongue:Karaoke...better invite plenty of ENFPs then!
 

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i don't know what your friend likes, but for my birthday this year, I was taken to a museum of my choice and allowed free range to educate myself for as long as I wanted, then went to my favorite restaurant, then to a hobby store where I got to pick out a gift for myself. I got cake too. Cake is always good.

Try to plan something that he would like to do. What is he interested in? Sports? take him to a game or get him tickets to see his favorite team. Science? take him to a museum. Food? take him to his favorite restaurant. Cars? a race or car-show. I know I like to be allowed to "geek out" and not have people be annoyed about it (like spending over 3 hours in the Strategic Air and Space Museum!)

OWL
 

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MOTM May 2011
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Ok, ok...all seriousness aside...

Let him in on the planning. No surprises, at all. Owl has some good ideas--just find out what his interests are and do that. Generally ISTJs will like having close friends and family around, with plenty of good food. A party seems like such a waste unless you give it purpose, like learning about something, preparing a meal, or doing some activity that is beneficial. A simple cook out on the patio can fill all of these criteria.

You gotta eat, so the meal provides the necessary reason.

People are close to you, so there isn't too much stress about relationships.

Minimize the gift giving--opening presents in a crowd is not an ISTJ forte.

The best gift is hearing the chatter of happy people that you know and love.

Srsly. Some of the best parties have been very low key; everyone's fed, I'm sitting in the corner, sipping tea and just listening to all the happy talk from people I love. The warm glow is just...tangible.:proud::happy::blushed:
 

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I personally hate birthdays, but if you are going to throw him a party, keep it small (a half dozen close friends) or else he'll end up feeling like Dustin Hoffman in the beginning of the Graduate. Just I'd actually prefer if nobody noticed it was my birthday, but thanks to Facebook, I doubt this will ever happen again...
 

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I personally hate birthdays, but if you are going to throw him a party, keep it small (a half dozen close friends) or else he'll end up feeling like Dustin Hoffman in the beginning of the Graduate. Just I'd actually prefer if nobody noticed it was my birthday, but thanks to Facebook, I doubt this will ever happen again...
I removed my birthday from my Facebook because it was annoying to get birthday wishes form people I don't know very well/care about. It just seems insincere.
 

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I removed my birthday from my Facebook because it was annoying to get birthday wishes form people I don't know very well/care about. It just seems insincere.
Then why do you have FB in the first place?
I think I'm one of 3 people in the Western Hemisphere that still doesn't.
 

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Then why do you have FB in the first place?
I think I'm one of 3 people in the Western Hemisphere that still doesn't.
I have almost deleted it a few times, actually, but then my Mom told me I couldn't because I "HAVE" to try online dating.:mellow:

She got me to fill out the looooong questionnaire thing and it came back and said this:

"We're very sorry, but our matching system cannot predict good matches for you."

Apparently no one in the country matches me. It's like getting rejected by the entire country at once. I was kind of relieved actually. That's some scary stuff to delve into.
 

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I know one of the other two...:cool:
I was really ROFL when I read that but then I started putting some serious thought into it. While I still think NOT having it is a type thing, I think that's also moderated by the fact that people that are younger are more likely to have it. At the same time, older people of different types may be likely to have it. So ... apparently we just fall into BOTH of those categories. What do you think about that theory?
 

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"We're very sorry, but our matching system cannot predict good matches for you."

Apparently no one in the country matches me. It's like getting rejected by the entire country at once.
I did that ONCE also, some years ago. I got the same answer. I don't think those sites can handle the level of detail and precision that we have. Remember, a PERSON had to program those computers, and that person was probably not an ISTJ. :crazy:
 

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I was really ROFL when I read that but then I started putting some serious thought into it. While I still think NOT having it is a type thing, I think that's also moderated by the fact that people that are younger are more likely to have it. At the same time, older people of different types may be likely to have it. So ... apparently we just fall into BOTH of those categories. What do you think about that theory?
I think you are right, but I also suspect gender and phase of life play a role. Most of my guy friends (my age) that have FB accounts do so because that they want to stay in contact with their kids. However the vast majority do not have FB accounts; in many instances, their wives do have accounts, though.

Older friends of a retirement age tend to have FB accounts--they have more time to fill.
 

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Discussion Starter · #17 ·
Thank you all for the suggestions! I also thought that it probably would be best to include him in the planning of where to go and what kind of food etc. After all it's all about control, right? :tongue:

Also, I'd like to point out the facebook tangent discussion, um isn't that what ISTJs complain that ENTPs do too often, going off in a completely different direction then where the thread started? :laughing:

BTW, my ISTJ friend does not have a facebook account..

And as an aside, there will be 2 ENFPs in attendance, an INTP, an ESFJ, an INFJ, and perhaps an ENTJ if she can make it with her executive's schedule. We just need to figure out location and activities. I like the small group idea and just hanging. We all usually have a great time together. As long as the INFJ doesn't get drunk and start getting pissed at the birthday boy. What was it I read about shadow cognitive function attraction...hmmm :crazy: :cool:
 

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Thank you all for the suggestions! I also thought that it probably would be best to include him in the planning of where to go and what kind of food etc. After all it's all about control, right?
Yes, but don't make the mistake of thinking that "control" is something that should be avoided like the plague. It isn't about us wanting to control others, really - even though we give off that impression. It's just that we DO NOT WANT ANYTHING TO GO WRONG.

Example: You buy all the tickets for a ballgame that you and your buddies are going to go to. You bought them all at the same time, so you assume that since you TOLD the ticket clerk that you all were going to be together and that you all wanted to be seated together, that the clerk didn't mess up and your tickets are correct. The mistake is that you didn't check them, and come game time, you find out that three of you are together and one of you is somewhere off in left field somewhere. Your ISTJ will be really, really annoyed that the clerk screwed up, and although he won't say it, annoyed that YOU didn't physically check your tickets when the clerk handed them to you; if you had, the mistake could have been corrected right then and there.

Also, I'd like to point out the facebook tangent discussion, um isn't that what ISTJs complain that ENTPs do too often, going off in a completely different direction then where the thread started?
As a matter of fact, you are indeed correct. Guilty as charged, which once again proves that we are in fact not robots.

BTW, my ISTJ friend does not have a facebook account..
Imagine that ............. :tongue:
 

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Also, I'd like to point out the facebook tangent discussion, um isn't that what ISTJs complain that ENTPs do too often, going off in a completely different direction then where the thread started? :laughing:
You do err, not knowing SJs in general, and ISTJs in particular.

This is an example of exactly how conversations operate in ISTJ land. Our conversations follow our sequential logical thought patterns, so if someone says (or writes) something that reminds us of something, we follow that train of thought in our conversation. Go back and read all of the references in order: You will see it is the natural ISTJ flow.
 
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