Can't find my type - 9 or 2?

For the longest time I was certain I am a nine. I never dreamed to be a two. But lately I have been so frustrated, especially with my boyfriend type 5. He is extremely busy with his studies and kids and we can't see much. Those few times we see, I have hard time not trying to do everything for him. He is so self sufficient I suffer when I can't do stuff for him. He is so calm and collected. But when we message and stuff, I expect to be noticed and I expect to get his attention and almost get mad when not. I have learned that he is very reserved and stingy with his time as a 5w6 sp can be and this drives me nuts. I do not show my inpatience to him but would not a nine just merge and be okay, independent? I don't know. I have that selfish bone in me and I have not been able to put my hands on it, but it would fit a two description. Certain lazyness and getting lost in my world and not getting stuff done is so ninish but when I am on the go, three can be very strong. Is that me as 9 moving to 3 or is that my wing as a two? I do feel pushing my help and opinions to others strongly a lot of times and not accepting their opinions. But I am not very social, that could be stacking? I go out of my way often to help people and want to be recognized for doing that. Unhealthily even... but then so many things speak for nine. I easily forget my own opinions and just follow others, do not want any disagreements. I can be very patient and understanding even though inside of me is a storm going on. Makes me very uneasy not knowing my definite type...