Personality Cafe banner
1 - 5 of 5 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
348 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hello ESFP's. I'm Sam and I'm an INTP. So here's the deal. I like many other INTP's are terrible at small talk. I am a decent actor and can kind of act my way through it if someone only speaks to me every now and then, but when you are talking to someone quite frequently like a potential significant other (cough cough nope no reason I'm bringing this example up, nope none at all cough) how do I make myself more aware of where someone wants a conversation to go? Usually I end up running out of common interests 15 minutes in and hide away at the nearest piano. Humor tends to work, but sometimes my jokes fall flat and I get socially paranoid. So I guess I just need advice. How do I sustain small talk with someone on a daily basis and keep it interesting for both of us? Thanks for any and all input,

yours truly,

an INTP Nudnik.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
134 Posts
People like to know that ur interested in them and what their saying, real genuine interest. So facial expressions and asking them more questions to better understand what they are saying usually goes far...at least for me.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
41 Posts
Talk about small talk in an elaborate and profound way I suppose. That's the only happy medium I can think of. For instance talk about the salt shaker and why you think the ceramics are disproportionate. Or you could start off with a small talk conversation about pop culture and gradually shift into a cynical attempt to persuade the listener else wise, and VERY gradually, especially if they're a feeling person, they won't be aware of your motives if the shift is gradual enough.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,647 Posts
Just a reminder Sam than small talk is in fact intended to be small. It doesn't usually extend for long periods of time. 5-15 minutes of small talk seems to be more than enough to me.
 
1 - 5 of 5 Posts
Top