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Im not going to lie, last night was one of the single greatest nights of my life, long story short went to a show and got way more then my monies worth. Meet some amazing people and got given a little taste of a dream of mine so yeah it was special.

However now a day later, yes Im still riding the adrenalin high but Im also starting to feel a little depressed as well. I cant explain why but its like I know I should be grateful for what happened but part of my mind is rejecting it and I can only focus on the negatives as to what happened. And this isnt new for me, its as if my mind is punishing me for allowing myself to enjoy life too much.

Last time something like this happened was when a friend of mine got me a shirt randomly... and it was the first time anyone had ever done anything like that. This includes birthdays and Christmas mind you, this was the first gift I had ever gotten from a friend. Anyways after that for the next week I felt on top of the world, life was great, and then I hit a wall.

It was like a two week depression where no matter what I did I just couldn't replicate the cheery outlook on life I normally had. I mean I knew I should be happy, I just couldn't bring myself to be, and I wound up spending all day either in my room, or at work, I wouldn't even go to class. It was very unhealthy and finally it was an acquaintance who talked me out of my funk with out even realizing it.

Now after last night, well I fear I may be falling into this pattern again... It doesn't help that I feel guilty about doing well at uni when my friends who I know put way more work then I do are now struggling.


Sorry bout the wall of text, I guess a TLDR: would be is there any advice or anything for coming down from a high that will ensure I down become a depressed shut in for no reason.
 

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I still haven't managed to soften the crash after a high, but I wanted you to know that I definitely feel for you and relate. I can usually sustain a high for a few days given the right circumstances, but I always crash pretty hard afterwards. In part, it has to do with the fact that once I get into the high, I neglect myself in other ways. I can't sleep at night because I'm too hyped up, and being tired makes me cranky. Therefore, it doesn't take much to pop that little Fe balloon of mine and send me spinning out of control.
 

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Yeah .. Positive feelings are a rush ... I've been dealing with the same problem all my life ... and I don't think there is a long-term solution to it.

The positive feelings are like a narcotic .. a drug. Aaand wherein lies the problem, lies the solution itself.

Think about what induces these positive feelings ... plan a series of events activities with friends/family etc that give you these feelings over and over again. When I was about your age, that's what I used to do --- I used to have massive crashes myself and at times I became so expectant of the crash, that I stopped going out there myself ---- but then I realized that in order to sustain the positive outlook, I needed a healthy balance of activities that kept me on a perpetual high.

I dunno how conducive your living conditions/friendships are for keeping a busy/healthy schedule - but you can give it a shot. And honestly, it's ok to crash once in a while and expect someone else to come to the rescue [Heh .. so 3w4 of us]. You would do the same for one of your friends, right? So what's so wrong about expecting it yourself?

Plus --- I think if you become consciously aware of the crash and why it happens [I honestly think it's got something to do with this optimism, positivity and repression of feelings of the 3 Core and the introspective/dark side of the 4], you will start having better control over it.

It's hard to accept that the negative feelings are as much a part of us as the positive - but that acceptance is an extremely important one to reach before we can truly learn to live with ourselves.

One can only recognize light when one experiences the darkness.
 

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Discussion Starter #4
First off I did a more detailed Enneagram test and yeah 3w4 so there ya go.

Also the whole being expectant of the crash thing, I think that's what is bringing most of this on. Anyways yea Im definatly going to take your advice on this one @Jawz and keep my self as occupied as possible. Something about that though doesn't feel permanent, however I guess nothing is and yea its ok once and a while to feel a little down, still hate it though.

As for being aware of the crash, well this is the first time ive exactly been aware of whats about to come, its always happened before however this is the first time Ive put two and two together as for when its going to come so maybe that will help. I know venting about it really did already, as has the advice and sympathy from you and @Etherea. So thank you both for actually reading that wall of text and responding.
 

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it's okay - AND MY TAKE (rambling)

It's worth it for the rush/hyper/happy period. The dark doesn't last forever. The dark doesn't last very long anymore for me, maybe a day or two, at most a week. I'll have one bad day then a slow build back to baseline.

Kind of like if a full moon that crashes to the new moon darkness when chaos rules, skipping the waning period - just goest from full to dark. Then you have to gradually build back up to a half moon baseline. Did that make sense?

Usually in the crash period I become introspective and alone, think about afterlife (i.e. is there one), other melancholly thoughts...this is the time where a little love goes a long way and a lotta love...well that can be a life saver. Takes an understanding friend or significant other! I know it's bad when the random hobbies are left unattended more than usual.

So - 1). find some nurturing, 2). force yourself into the sun, 3). watch some cartoons, 4). actually exercise is quite liberating - maybe a long walk or a run on a trail - maybe you'll find a critter that piques your curiosity and brings you back.

Last crash I had I went for a random walk/run before work in a park and found a snapping turtle on a trail. He refused to let me get behind him, just kept turning when I was trying to get some pictures with my phone. He was crabby and withdrawn - I related and said -- "Okay, I'll let you be" and left him behind. Suddenly I realized I left my own darkness behind at the same time. I smiled as a lady running towards me met eye contact. She was running with her dog. I told her about an awesome snapping turtle up ahead that is very cranky, so watch your little pup. She smiled and thanked me, and I knew I was back!

LASTLY- REMEMBER YOU DESERVE THOSE HAPPY HIGH TIMES, YOU DO THAT/BRING THAT OUT IN SO MANY OTHERS, SO DON'T FEEL BAD FOR HAVING THEM YOURSELF!!!
 
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