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I have always wondered how compatibility is linked between the different types on the enneagram. Can you actually connect lines (like the lines of integration and disintegration) to show the most compatible pairs? If not, what are the most compatible pairs?

Thank you!
 

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I heard that female Fours are compatible with male Eights and Nines. Makes sense considering I adore male Nines. Forgot where I read it though...
 

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I agree that 9s and 1s can be a good couple. I think 1 + 5 works out well, too (I picked a 5). Fives seem like pretty-laid back people for the most parts, as do 9s, so they can help balance out a more engaging type (like 1 or 6, for instance).

I also find that in medical/therapeutic relationships, I get along well with 9s, too. My hypnotherapist is a confirmed 9, and my GP is a suspected 9. I've found that I can work well with both these individuals- they're a better fit for me than many other professionals I've dealt with. Don't know if it's specifically because they're 9s- I think they'd be great people regardless of type- but I do seem to get along very well with most 9s.
 

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I think that instinctual stacking is more important in that regard than Enneagram types. At least from my experience.
 

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I think that instinctual stacking is more important in that regard than Enneagram types. At least from my experience.
This is a good point. I wouldn't say it's necessarily more important, but having at least the same dominant variant can make things easier in a relationship. The two people involved in the relationship are inclined to understand certain behaviors better, at least, this is how it's worked out for me thus far.
 

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This is a good point. I wouldn't say it's necessarily more important, but having at least the same dominant variant can make things easier in a relationship. The two people involved in the relationship are inclined to understand certain behaviors better, at least, this is how it's worked out for me thus far.
I would agree with this. I know my partner is SO first and it's third for me. I'm SX first and I suspect he's probably SX third, but possibly second. There are a few times I've wished we were both SX because I don't relate much to social variants.

But our relationship still works despite that - I'm 5w4 sx/sp, and he's 6w7 so/xx. I don't see 5 and 6 relationships referenced very often, but I know there's a number of people on this board who are in a 5 and 6 relationship.
 

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I think there are characteristics about the Etypes and their makings in each individual which play a large factor in compatibility that has great difficulty being explained by either instinctual variants or wing theory. For instance, some 6s have trouble settling down with an SO and are always looking for something interesting and this would not make them compatible with a 1 because 1s often emphasize stability instead of an outgoing nature though 1s are supposed to be highly compatible. Some 1s are too objective and detached to be compatible a 6s and their trust issues. Some 1s do not emphasize the objective nature of the world, but instead causes so they're less likely to be compatible with 5s than some others.
 

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in my opinion
on a scale from 1-10 of how likely things would work out
7+1: 1/10
7+2: depends (7w6: 7/10; 7w8 3/10)
7+3: 8/10
7+4: 7/10
7+5: 4/10
7+6: 6/10
7+7: depends(if same wing: 5/10; if opposing wings, 8/10)
7+8: 6/10
7+9: 7/10
 

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in my opinion
on a scale from 1-10 of how likely things would work out
7+1: 1/10
7+2: depends (7w6: 7/10; 7w8 3/10)
7+3: 8/10
7+4: 7/10
7+5: 4/10
7+6: 6/10
7+7: depends(if same wing: 5/10; if opposing wings, 8/10)
7+8: 6/10
7+9: 7/10
why so poorly with the 1s?
 

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why so poorly with the 1s?
1s are focused on doing things the right way. usually they're very much into rules and have high expectations for their loves. I despise those who place expectation on me. 1+7 or 1+8 are relationships that are probably not going to work well given 1 and strong superego and 7s and 8s are crazy, wild Id types who resist control and attempts at "taming"
 

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The link @Ace Face posted has some freakishly, creepily accurate descriptions of type interactions. Many of them have been extremely true for me.

It's said that fours and nines go well together, but both of my serious relationships have been with male nines and both have ended not-so-pleasantly and conflicts/conflict resolution was never pleasant. I think there are many more factors that come into play.
 

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The link @Ace Face posted has some freakishly, creepily accurate descriptions of type interactions. Many of them have been extremely true for me.

It's said that fours and nines go well together, but both of my serious relationships have been with male nines and both have ended not-so-pleasantly and conflicts/conflict resolution was never pleasant. I think there are many more factors that come into play.
It's kinda creepy how accurate it was for me, too *nods*
 

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I think the overall tritype and order makes a huge difference. I'm 741 and my Husband is 63_. We have had our struggles, but we seem to always overcome them and come out stronger than ever.
 
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