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These are all related questions. Morgan Freeman was talking about how the universe could be a superorganism where the arteries carry neutrinos and the whole point is to reproduce using black holes.
I thought for sure you were talking about Neil deGrasse Tyson
 

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I’m bored of this level.

I bought the book, it was fairly easy. These new criteria will be a powerful method of typing. Perhaps a highly in-depth analysis can be used to type anyone using well-defined hunches.
 

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I'm secretly hurting a lot about that INFJ crush of mine. She changed so suddenly into such a cold person and it feels like I don't even know her any more.

It's not like she's the first person I've formed an online 'relationship' with (not romantic or whatever, just an online contact of some form), but it's clearly something extra when it leans into longggg phone calls, daily messaging, etc etc. Then suddenly it just stopped dead. Her tone has changed, her replies feel forced, and this is only with sporadic messaging every couple of days - I deliberately reduced the chatting because she said it's what she wanted. She says she finds it hard to maintain online contacts, but I think that was just an excuse she gave me. Either way, it just stopped so suddenly and so fucking coldly.

It really feels like she's transformed into a whole other person and I have no idea what I said to cause it. It's cutting me up more than it should, I didn't even know it was possible for someone I've never met to cause me pain in this way. I can handle romantic rejection (because yes I know it's silly to have an online crush), but I cannot handle when people change so dramatically without reason. I think it's an INTP thing, to need reasons for things. I should probably tell her all this but I don't know how to do it in the right way.
 

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Was in touch with INFJ crush again. I decided to bravely ask her straight: "Are you ok, your messages have lost all their warmth, it's like the old you has disappeared".

She said she never noticed it and it was probably just down to me over-thinking (and she said it in her old warm way). She then admitted that maybe she's coming across as a bit colder because she's thinking a lot right now about her life, job, career, ambitions etc, and I got the sense that she's feeling a little hopeless about it all.

Somehow this gave me the closure I wanted. It's not nice because she's obviously not in a great place mentally, but at least I can feel somewhat relieved that she didn't go cold because of me specifically. I don't mind if we stay out of contact for a while now. She can do her own thing. As I said in my above post, all I wanted was a reason.

:D
 

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I was dumb enough to make an account in my own name. I've never done that before. I've excelled in maths, economics and finance at a high level both academically and in work and yet I cannot get over how stupid I can be sometimes. Oh well no regrets, always moving forward and learning.

Not an intp thing to act before thinking.
 

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Today I feel anxious for no reason.

It's annoying, but it's better than feeling depressed for no reason.

But god it really is annoying. I have nothing to be anxious about but I just feel anxious. How bizarre! It might be because I had no cigarettes yesterday. This last couple of weeks I've been smoking 2-3 a day, which is definitely in the territory of being an actual smoker, rather than the "I smoke sometimes but I'm not an actual smoker" spiel I usually go by. So maybe I'm suffering withdrawal symptoms.

Therefore, I'm going to go a couple more days without cigarettes. Maybe a week. I'll just go as long as I can before I start to feel really cooped up again. But I already feel cooped up. Hmm.
 

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Today I feel anxious for no reason.

It's annoying, but it's better than feeling depressed for no reason.

But god it really is annoying. I have nothing to be anxious about but I just feel anxious. How bizarre! It might be because I had no cigarettes yesterday. This last couple of weeks I've been smoking 2-3 a day, which is definitely in the territory of being an actual smoker, rather than the "I smoke sometimes but I'm not an actual smoker" spiel I usually go by. So maybe I'm suffering withdrawal symptoms.

Therefore, I'm going to go a couple more days without cigarettes. Maybe a week. I'll just go as long as I can before I start to feel really cooped up again. But I already feel cooped up. Hmm.
I like to set myself a limit, a threshold anxiety/stress level before lighting one up. Also been thinking about granting myself one on Sundays, because it suits the day. As long as I don't cheat (i.e. smoke out of boredom, 'oh what the hell', too weak an anxiety/stress level, etc.), it shouldn't amount to more than 2-3/week.
 

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I like to set myself a limit, a threshold anxiety/stress level before lighting one up. Also been thinking about granting myself one on Sundays, because it suits the day. As long as I don't cheat (i.e. smoke out of boredom, 'oh what the hell', too weak an anxiety/stress level, etc.), it shouldn't amount to more than 2-3/week.
I've kind of just accepted that smoking is a thing for me at the moment. I know I stopped very easily when I wanted to stop, and I know I'll stop again when I decide to. The problem for me now is that this lockdown shite is really wearing very thin, so I'm just clutching onto anything that gives me a feeling of taking a break. As absurd as it sounds, the smoking has helped.

But yeah, 2-3 a day is too many. That being said, I remember a Chinese coworker I had in my first job in China (a country where you're allowed to smoke indoors in certain places). He would often share cigarettes with me, and he told me, "As long as you don't have more than 10 a day, it's not unhealthy."

10 a day 😂
 

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I've kind of just accepted that smoking is a thing for me at the moment. I know I stopped very easily when I wanted to stop, and I know I'll stop again when I decide to. The problem for me now is that this lockdown shite is really wearing very thin, so I'm just clutching onto anything that gives me a feeling of taking a break. As absurd as it sounds, the smoking has helped.
Erich Fromm, psychologist, wrote something about smoking a cigarette = occupying all senses at once (taste, feel, smell, everything). It's also said that smoking in the dark isn't nearly as enjoyable (and the reason why blind people don't smoke). Just to say: it's the ultimate distraction.

But yeah, 2-3 a day is too many. That being said, I remember a Chinese coworker I had in my first job in China (a country where you're allowed to smoke indoors in certain places). He would often share cigarettes with me, and he told me, "As long as you don't have more than 10 a day, it's not unhealthy."

10 a day 😂
What he meant was: as long as you don't passively smoke 10 cigarettes a day here with me you're alright. Maybe alright. Probably not though.
 

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I failed and bought some cigarettes today.

I just can't allow myself to be cooped up indoors all day. My balcony cigarettes are the lifeline I need.

I guess I could just go outside for a walk so I can get a change of scenery, but sheesh... that takes effort.
 

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I was dumb enough to make an account in my own name. I've never done that before. I've excelled in maths, economics and finance at a high level both academically and in work and yet I cannot get over how stupid I can be sometimes. Oh well no regrets, always moving forward and learning.

Not an intp thing to act before thinking.
XD , i think we are all stupids at some degree , An Intp acting before thinking is probabily a daily thing ...but using your real name is a no no ( 'cause some crazy people in the internet ) , funny enough i wouldn't never imagine that toni was your real name xD ( my real name is Manuel btw ).

Well, sharing information is what makes us better and really who will read an INTP xDDD physiological forum.
 

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All this time I thought @Toni Farrow was some Mark Twain character.

Good news is: you can change your username. Used to be a thread on here (old PerC) but I can't seem to find it. Should be somewhere in the Help section. Alternatively, you could contact a mod.
 

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I'd like to change my username. My name isn't Hal. I want a cool retro-sci-fi hacker name, the kind that turns heads when it appears on the news.

"A user known as turbo took down the Guatemalan oil industry yesterday through a series of co-ordinated internet hacks"

Ok I wanna be called turbo.
 

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I failed and bought some cigarettes today.

I just can't allow myself to be cooped up indoors all day. My balcony cigarettes are the lifeline I need.

I guess I could just go outside for a walk so I can get a change of scenery, but sheesh... that takes effort.
I have a Pavlovian relationship with cigarettes. When I was studying and working I would reward myself with one for a break.
Now whenever I sit down in front of a computer to write my thoughts down I get a strong craving to smoke.
 

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I have a Pavlovian relationship with cigarettes. When I was studying and working I would reward myself with one for a break.
Now whenever I sit down in front of a computer to write my thoughts down I get a strong craving to smoke.
I haven't reached a 'reward' phase yet.

For years, my smoking has basically been caused be a set of oddly-defined reasons for when smoking is allowed. The big one for me is being at a nice view in a warm environment. If I have a cigarette, it means I'm allowed to sit there and bask in the niceness for a while. Otherwise I'm sat doing nothing and just feel weird about it.

And more recently in lockdown, my excuse is just something to get myself onto my balcony for a change of scenery. I've so far been quite well restrained. A typical day is 2-3 cigarettes, and I've never got worse in that regard.

I've also found on many occasions that I can stop smoking and easily overcome any withdrawal feelings. When lockdown ends I don't expect to smoke any more, unless drinking.

I wonder if there's a psychological term to describe such a relationship with cigarettes.
 

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Can we change the subject? I had two earlier (cheat day), in rapid succession, and now my heart is palpitating. Like a spasm, I can feel/see my chest twitch...
 

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I haven't reached a 'reward' phase yet.

For years, my smoking has basically been caused be a set of oddly-defined reasons for when smoking is allowed. The big one for me is being at a nice view in a warm environment. If I have a cigarette, it means I'm allowed to sit there and bask in the niceness for a while. Otherwise I'm sat doing nothing and just feel weird about it.

And more recently in lockdown, my excuse is just something to get myself onto my balcony for a change of scenery. I've so far been quite well restrained. A typical day is 2-3 cigarettes, and I've never got worse in that regard.

I've also found on many occasions that I can stop smoking and easily overcome any withdrawal feelings. When lockdown ends I don't expect to smoke any more, unless drinking.

I wonder if there's a psychological term to describe such a relationship with cigarettes.
Being in the moment maybe? Mindfulness.

I think we are lucky in the UK with vaccines being rolled out so fast the end is hopefully in sight!
 
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