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I don't take compatibility guidance too seriously as for me it comes down to the individual in the end, but I can understand the concept of people in possession of the dominant cognitive functions you lack helping you improve and provide you with the perspectives/energy you would otherwise be devoid of. Still, I keep seeing other INTJs mention ENFPs, ENTPs, even ENFJs as the types they end up gravitating to or have a good match with and it makes me ponder about how so many others can handle all that Ne and Fe energy. I hold the same sentiments towards other seemingly preferred types of INTJs.
For example, Ne and Ti-dominants were always my doom in an academic setting - they tend to misinterpret my thinking and learning habits as a sign of obtuseness, while their teaching style leaves me disorientated. In comparison, I do like Si-dominants better for covering my blindspots even if we are bound to clash as well. Fe-dominants are my worst enemy, they are aliens to me. As for the types I'm naturally comfortable with: the Fi-dominants I knew I initially got along well with, but they turned out to be too intense for me, now Te and Se-dominants are the best at motivating me to take action and help me get in tune with my neglected, more active self. It's easy for me to communicate with them too, especially in a work setting.
So to put it succintly, I'm just slightly confused about how other INTJs don't get exhausted by those unfamiliar cognitive functions and find a way to get along so well, apparently.
 

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How about more Te than Ti?

Take the test from Neojungian Typology the most accurately you can to determine your Neojungian Typology type and your 3 Neojungian Typology sub-types (see post 3) then I will tell you your best matches to hope for.

 

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I think I have trouble dealing with Fe. I'm female INTJ. I don't know what their MBTI types are, but some women accuse me of being rude or angry when I don't concur with their thinking. They accuse me of implying things I didn't say -- things they concluded in their own minds.

When encountering drama, I remain emotionless. I let them rage it out and walk away. They come back, sometimes with apologies. I do damage control because I like them. I tell them I'm not upset (because I'm not) and I don't take it personally (because I don't).

Fi can be stubborn, idealistic, and hard to negotiate with, but at least it doesn't demand that you agree. Fe needs validation, or it lashes out.
 

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So to put it succintly, I'm just slightly confused about how other INTJs don't get exhausted by those unfamiliar cognitive functions and find a way to get along so well, apparently.
Depending, I am more exhausted by some than others.

Dominant Ne rapidly drains me. I am pretty good at picking out ENxPs (esp T) because they can, as I say, pop my circuits at times. That said, my best friend is ENTP. Still, we rarely have discussions on topics where we diverge (which aren't many) because the way she debates is like trying to catch a drunk, rabid spider monkey. Just not enjoyable and very exhausting and potentially dangerous. Once her aux Ti has made a determination, there's really no point or logic that can sway that. ENFP drains me less because they are more silly and entertaining when you meet them casually plus, I always find it easy to get along with the average Te/Fi (in either order) person for some reason.

Meanwhile, dominant Ti I love love love. I gravitate towards it and most of the guys I've dated have been dominant Ti. Even as a kid, I always crushed on the know-it-all nerd type so there you go. It almost soothes me. They are so interesting and fun. I often ask my INTP boyfriend to just chat about whatever he wants when I wanna zone out. I should add, I fall asleep to audiobooks. Related? Probably. I befriend possibly more than average ISTPs as well. I have a personal hypothesis that INTJ is logically the best bridge between INTP and ISTP types.

Dominant Si...

When it's over Te, I get along with fantastically but it's never a perfectly harmonious relationship, regardless of the capacity of the relationship. Boyfriend's dad is ISTJ and we get along swimmingly but it's iffy if I'd enjoy being his employee or child or anything like that where he'd have more explicit control over what/how I do things.

When it's over Fe, possibly one of the most infuriating situations for me. To be fair, that would be all functions opposite from me so maybe that's why I have such abrasive interactions with them. I don't think many types wear me down and frustrate me like an ISFJ.

Which brings me to dominant Fe. Most of the time, it's a tough fit. I just don't get them and that seems to cause a lot of friction. I have to be much more careful navigating around their very different approach to things (if you're actively avoiding making problems). Historically, it has been, for the most part, the worst function for me to deal with and I just avoid it whenever I can.

I do admit, I am slightly at odds with that concept you hear about often where it encourages you to spend time with people who are strong where you are weak. You hear it on these sort of pedestrian MBTI articles, especially romantic pairings. I think it depends. I think there is a compatibility beyond typing and if you don't get along with a person, you can't learn from them. I don't at all get along with probably 9/10 FJs but then 2 out of my top 10 favorite people are FJs. They're just not similar to the types of FJs I clash with. Meanwhile, I love my dominant Ti's but god there are some dominant Ti people who I wouldn't mind if they crossed the train tracks at just the wrong time.

So, perhaps some of your exhaustion is from hanging around the wrong type of people who are strong where you are weak. There are always spectrums within spectrums and variations on top of that.
 

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It's individual thing. An INTJ who appreciates understanding others' emotions would prefer Fe/Ni company, humor would appreciate Ne, outdoor Se and so on.
 

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Sociology says that INTJ is best matched with ISFP, ENTJ, and ESFP (especially), the other three gamma types. Basically, their rule is to stick to the same functions (Se/Ni/Te/Fi) because there will be fewer misunderstandings and more concrete results. Not to mention, these pairings are more complementary rather than exotic and novel. Lots of people get caught up in pairings that seem fun and exciting (INTJxENFP) but that rarely works for long-term relationships. You can't expect the same energy to last year after year, and when you get bored the relationship dies away. Challenging, practical, and reliable from the outset is the way to go, assuming you can find common goals (which is important anyway).

All other pairings basically have an expiration date, and after that it greatly depends on how much work you're willing to put into maintaining them. Some people prefer to invest time and energy into the relationship itself, so they might be more comfortable with a less compatible partner. Usually, highly compatible partners are best if you can't spend a lot of time putting out fires in the relationship because you have a lot of responsibilities on your plate like raising kids or a high-stakes job. Even if there's an optimal choice that doesn't mean that there's a right answer, since it still has to fit your needs and preferences.
 

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For example, Ne and Ti-dominants were always my doom in an academic setting - they tend to misinterpret my thinking and learning habits as a sign of obtuseness, while their teaching style leaves me disorientated.
Quoted for truth, sigh. IDK. If I were 'interested' in someone I'm sure type would come up, but I can't deal with the function-level view of the whole thing. So as far as analysing which ones and why, I don't have the grasp to get started on that.

Nobody I've ever gotten to know well enough to discuss mbti has been a sensor or extrovert. I know that. Almost all of my friends have turned out - after the friendship was already formed - to be inxx.

Type doesn't tell people what to think ime. It more just delineates how. And I think that ime the 'how' matters when it comes to those tougher discussions where two people do not agree and need to try and figure out what each others positions are. I can't label it by the functions though.

I know with some people I could not even follow what they were trying to say; or did they seem to be following me. So we could not even get to the same table and get consensus on what we were there to discuss.

I don't think that's fatal either though. Some couples seem to just agree to leave tracts of each other as black-box pockets. The longer I live the more different types of relationship there seem to be.
 

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I understand what lilysocks is saying. Many types of relationships function in various capacities and offer value, making them worth maintaining.

A number of people I associate with are Extroverted S types. They can be fun, depending on the topic of conversation. If the situation involves extended periods of time, Meyers Briggs can help solve conflicts.
 
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