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Hi guys. :tongue::tongue::tongue::tongue: So at my workplace, we started having leadership training and workshops on problem solving and conflict management. We were basically trained on how to give feedback that is constructive, and highlights the points we disagree on, and most importantly, focus on the ISSUE, instead of making comments about the person, including things like lifestyle and personal disposition.

Anyway. it went WELL. At first, I was a little hesitant about this training/workshop because I was concerned about feelings getting hurt left and right, including mine. :unsure: But, it turned out really well for many reasons. And I felt the constructive feedback we gave and received from each other was extremely productive, but in a peaceful, harmonious way. <- and THIS is really important for me.

They made us take quizzes and the two options they geared us to were people focused on productivity or people focused on personal relationships (mine was productivity, BTW). We also did interactive exercises, like drawing a picture on the board or building something with lego blocks (simple stuff) based on instructions from other people and then we critiqued each other. So an example was, someone had to draw something but they didnt see what they had to draw- we all had a copy of what the final drawing should look like, but the prson drawing the picture had to rely on us to communicate the information. (Then the critique format was: say one or few things you think are good, then say what you think can be improved or why you disagree with the method - both ways, our feedback for the drawer, and the drawer's feedback for the rest of us). Other exercises were crafting ways to present a product

I noticed a trend of two types of reactions: One were from people who seemed more problem-oriented: "tell me the problem, let's figure out how to fix it, be as vicious as you want in your feedback" (yes, same term was used and they didnt seem much bothered about anything not positive). Second, were the ones that got really visibly offended or took something extremely personally even if the feedback wasn't about their personality or them as a person. They would get visibly offended when other people received anything other than positive feedback. It actually bothered me that they would take things super personally because then I was torn between a) feeling bad for saying something to upset them and b) having to say something because there was obviously something that need to be fixed or addressed. Some of these people would then get offended and then in the written (technically anonymous) feedback form, they would make a comment about someone's personal disposition and things like that.

Surprisingly, I sort of fell in the first category of people and I think this is because I am more oriented towards productivity. Two of my coworkers there (one INFJ and one ESFJ), and they also fell into the 'productivity/vicious feedback' category. I was obviously not happy or excited to hear negative feedback, but i felt I got a lot out of the workshop because it helped me be more productive. Anyway what are your thoughts on this, constructive criticism and feedback in general?
 

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Definitely the first category. I don't take vicious criticisms of my work personally, unless it's someone I'm very close too, or I have deep respect for (as these are people who usually are full of kindness towards me)...
 

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Wow, that was a long post! I'm all for constructive criticism. It really irks me when people take constructive criticism personally, especially if they then use it to attack the person that's trying to help them. Not cool. I think objective feedback is essential, but subjective feedback can do more harm than good - the least of which is wasting time tiptoeing around people's feelings (if they have a history of taking criticism of their work as a personal attack).
 

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I like constructive criticism as long as I can see that it is valid aka I can see that I made a mistake. If I can't see that then I will probably ignore it.

I don't get offended if I don't care about that person's opinion.

I would never engage in personal attacks, they're pretty ridiculous.
 

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It depends. If it's a debate about subject matter and you feel that I am wrong, then by all means say so.
OTOH, if you read the question wrong and then tell ME that I am wrong, we're going to have words.

Example:

Question posed in my Labor Relations class:
"In your opinion, who was the greatest labor leader in American history? Why?"

Reply from other student, replying to my original post:
"Chavez was a very influential labor leader but the discussion board ask for the most famous labor leader. I think you would agree that Jimmy Hoffa is a name that most would associate with labor unions."

My reply to her:
"First of all, I would like to agree with one point that you made – Jimmy Hoffa is the most recognized name in labor unions. There is a long list of individuals that have sacrificed themselves for the ideals of fair wages for fair work.
However, I would like to point out that this discussion wasn’t about the most famous name in labor or labor unions. The easiest thing for anyone to do is say “Jimmy Hoffa”, but that is only because of his name recognition. If you want to convince me that he was the greatest labor leader as the assignment states (see above), then I need more information than the fact that he is the most recognized.
I may be incorrect, but my comprehension of the assignment was that we discuss the point of who was the greatest labor leader in American history, and not the most famous.
I look forward to a spirited and friendly debate on this and other issues in this class, from both you and my fellow classmates."

I'm probably going to get flamed by my classmates for this. I pointed out to her that she in fact read the question wrong. Will it help her to be more conscientious of future material in the class (given that I'm probably going to be stuck working with her again in group projects)? Probably not; she'll probably get mad and flame me or run off and cry to the professor.
 

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@curious--

Yes, I am task oriented and prefer more direct feedback (although I wouldn't call it vicious), as long as it is not personal in nature.

@Sela--

I HATE it when people don't stay on topic when answering a question, or infer a bunch of garbage. I agree with your assessment of the "Jimmy Hoffa" discussion. I also agree that you are about to be flamed.:crazy:
 
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Probably. Wouldn't be the first time, and I'm sure it won't be the last. I'm actually doing her a favor by pointing out her mistake while she's still in school as opposed to the real business world.
 
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