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Do you tend to be critical?

I shy away from critical people, but I think sometimes I can be this way myself. Like, for example, I have gone to see a show or something with my friends and they all rave about the good things, and all I can do is think to myself, "Wow, that girl had a terrible singing voice. HORRIBLE." I don't want to ruin anyone else's time, so I rarely will voice my critical opinions... and I feel annoyed at myself for being so negative, but... you see?

It is hard for me not to notice flaws, I guess. Dislike about myself.
 
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I'm a perfectionist, and I'm excessively critical of myself and the things I create as a result. However, I don't apply these personal standards to other people or their creations.

I'm much more likely to find beauty in art than I am to point out flaws. This applies to most artistic pursuits such as writing, dance, film, and pretty much everything else. Music might be a bit of an exception, but that's more of a personal taste issue than thinking something is "good" or "bad," and I recognize that.

Maybe it's a type 4 thing for me (if I even am, of course); I don't feel right critiquing someone else's form of artistic expression, so it's difficult for me to think about the negatives.

When it comes to character flaws, however, my attitude is rather inconsistent. I'm sometimes very critical of others' character when they are merely bothersome (but I don't really vocalize it), and I'm very easygoing and non-judgmental at other times. I still judge myself the most harshly though. That much is consistent!
 
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My vehicle is INFP, 9w8. Vroom vroom!!
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It is possible for me to be very critical of others, but I value tolerance in myself. I choose tolerance. When I'm around critical people, I'm determined to look at the bright side. I don't like to hear it when people point out every little wrong thing, even if I completely agree with them! I want to find some enjoyment in what I'm doing, no matter what, and I don't want to be like those negative people who have to bring everyone down. I'm one of those people who says "Have fun!" and truly means it.

When I come across things I dislike, I try to open up my judgement to first find something tolerable or admirable about that thing. I just try to see why other people do or like that thing. It's like a fun little challenge! Then over the next few days, I accumulate a series of things I like/accept/understand about what I dislike. It doesn't mean I change my mind about it, although I do sometimes. It just gives me a sense of common ground/empathy for other people's preferences and for those people.

I can be very self-critical, but I work through it close to the same way. Instead of finding something tolerable about the bad I did, I look for how it can help/teach me and others in the long run. Today, I taught some kids, and I had a blank moment like an idiot. Instead of literally slapping myself in the face for acting like an idiot, I'm looking at what I'll do next time to avoid blank moments like that. I focus on how my peers, who were observing me, were able to learn from my mistake and how they saw that I'm not always so put together when I'm working. I can also be happy and thankful that my own teacher helped set me back on the right track so my lesson wasn't a flop. So, I don't have to feel bad about myself, and I don't have to be upset and hang onto it. I'm obviously still thinking about it now, but it won't matter so much tomorrow, or even later today.
 
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I'm kind of the opposite of you on this one. I am much more attracted to critical people than otherwise. People who AREN'T critical can actually make me more anxious in the sense that people who don't voice their opinions make me wonder what said opinions even are in the first place, especially if these people make a point to white lie or ommit their negative criticism.

I'm also a very critical person. I voice my opinions openly. If people are raving about something, I'll interject with my opposing opinion most of the time, and on purpose (sometimes I do it reflexively; it's almost natural for me to voice my opinion). I feel like it makes room for more argument on the thing being raved about if there are multiple perspectives, so I pitch in with mine to see if they can see eye to eye with me in some way and vice versa. Besides, I say my opinions respectfully, so, if even then people are getting bothered at me giving out my opinion in a humble manner, it's their damn problem, not mine. If I'm with them, I assume my presence matters. In the same way I want to hear their opinion and criticism, I assume they are fine with mine; that is, if the situation is one where I am willingly there or if people brought me there. Naturally, in situations where it would be a dick move to say my piece, I don't. But I find that these situations are truthfully few and far in between.

Another thing is that I do like discussing opinions, and I like discussing both the qualities and flaws of something. As such, I'll discuss something I'm interested in in great detail, pointing out flaws and all and ramble extensively about them. I don't really hold back, though my tone in speaking is casual, soft and humble. So, I put 'It's shit' in prettier words and huge justifications as to why that is.

In general, however, I'm more critical towards myself than other people. When people tell me they wanna be something, I cheer them on, even if the chances are low. After all, they are just chances. If they wanna do something with their lives, I'll let them assuming even they know of the low chances. If they screw up once or twice, I forgive them; if they say something that ticks me off? No problem. If they have some personality flaw, it's no big deal. The thing is, I can point out someone's flaws, but flaws are no more than a part of a person's puzzle if I don't resent said flaws. It's why I don't think being critical and judging in and of itself is bad: you can say someone sucks at something and say why, but it's when you shun them for it needlessly that it starts being malicious. After all, if you're just pointing out a flaw, that's all you're doing. You don't mean any harm to the person; you like them anyway; you find them neutral; you're not shunning them. Then what's the big deal? Everybody has flaws, and I think people grow more if they know their flaws so if anything, I encourage people giving others constructive criticism on anything. I tell people they can tell me what they think are my flaws straight up; yes, it will make me very sad, I might want to cry because I feel as though I'm failing these people, but it's still worth listening and a reference point for myself (or even for what people think of me).

But anyway, even though I'm very critical, I'm also very forgiving. If other people screw up, I can forgive them, tolerate them or not care unless it's something big. I might criticize them, but it's hard for me to resent them and I will not shun them.

However, I am NOT forgiving towards myself. I screw up once? Oh my God I am a horrible person what is wrong with me noooo-- I say something wrong one time in one conversation? I'll be beating myself over with it for weeks. Any flaw of mine will be scrutinized and criticized in minute detail; I am ruthless towards myself. This is mostly because I want to improve myself, but also because of my fear of screwing up and being wrong in general. I don't like wasting mine or people's time. The best way to do things is doing them right. If I do them wrong, I might as well not be needed there. Stuff like that gets me criticizing myself. I want to be the very best at things, but that's not a thing that happens because I'm human, so I at least criticize myself to get as close to that as possible. Still, on things I know I suck at, I'm less hard on myself with.

Whatever the case, I'd say noticing flaws in things is a great thing, personally? It's more wrong to only see the qualities and let bad things stagnate with unwarranted praise. People who see flaws and criticize things are the people who usually engage you to think for the opposite side, making you not as stuck on one; I think this is rather important when it comes to evaluating things fairly. Being negative only sucks when you make a big deal out of negatives that aren't a big deal or when you're making up flaws. If you observe them and verify they are true and warranted, it's not something bad.
 

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Yeah I can relate especially with the part about not voicing them. I do notice flaws because of my perfectionism... but I guess I'm contradictory in the sense that I'm also usually the positive one trying to notice the good. I think it just depends and I do the opposite of what others around me are doing XD
 

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mm...no?

My secondary brand of humor is cynicism though...more of a satire of people who genuinely are critical about motivations, so I end up sounding a lot more negative than I intend to be. I'm currently losing my rose-colored glasses so to speak, so I would say I'm more critical for my own benefit (keeping it real and recognizing multiple sides of a situation, person, idea, etc.) than just for the sake of it.

But generally I PREFER to be more optimistic, and my head is still stuck on the clouds most of the time. I just feel too crusty and dreary when I'm negative too often. Takes too much energy for me.
 
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