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Does your curiosity cross personal boundaries and annoy or disturb the people around you? Is this an INTP trait or a trait of other types? Do INTPs run into this problem? How do you handle the situation?

I’m too goddamn curious about everything. I ask questions about everything and apply the same methods to myself, which occasionally leads me to view life in a very cynical and depressing way.

Sometimes I don’t understand when to stop prodding and I constantly want to know why other people believe or act in certain ways, which ends up irritating them, because they believe I’m challenging their authority or attempting to debate, but I really want to understand what their reasons are.

It seems most people hold strong beliefs and instead of discussing these subjects in an open and honest way, they prefer to remain adamant and not explore other possibilities.

However, perhaps I am approaching them too bluntly, by cutting out the small talk and diving straight into meaningful conversation. I have no right to interfere with people, even if I am friends with them, but I am too goddamn curious about why things are the way they are.

/end slobbering rant :mellow:
 

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Sadly, I'm the same. I tend to get into trouble with my boss because I just can't seem to stop asking questions. No wonder I never get promoted! :dry:
 

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Not really. For some reason people tend to trust me, so when I ask something they will usually just tell me and think nothing of it. I tend to ask a lot of personal questions to get to know people better, and people never really seemed bothered by it. But sometimes I snoop around in other people's things and obviously no one appreciates that very much XD

Although they don't know about my snooping, so I suppose them not liking it is speculative.
 

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I find when I socialise with most people I am able to put myself on auto-pilot, therefore I am able to have small talk with them and not ask any questions about anything, simply because I know they wouldn't like to have the conversations I would prefer to have, and probably wouldn't be able to contribute much to them.

However I have a couple of close friends who are similar to me so we often have debates and discussions and it works well.

The one problem I do have however is with my mum. She gets very irritated by me and feels like I'm attacking her when we have some conversations. I'm not at all, I'm purely wondering what she has based her thought/belief on.

I like to be as rational and logical as possible, so I like to know things from all possible perspectives aswell. Yet it seems most people prefer not to, they believe/think something and they stick to it, they don't even really care why they do or if there may be a different or even better way to view something.
 
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I can relate. I've also been called a cynic etc. I am naturally curious about things and particularly on why people act in certain ways but most of the time I don't get satisfying answers. I've learned to just shut up and look for answers elsewhere.
 

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I find when I socialise with most people I am able to put myself on auto-pilot, therefore I am able to have small talk with them and not ask any questions about anything, simply because I know they wouldn't like to have the conversations I would prefer to have, and probably wouldn't be able to contribute much to them.

However I have a couple of close friends who are similar to me so we often have debates and discussions and it works well.

The one problem I do have however is with my mum. She gets very irritated by me and feels like I'm attacking her when we have some conversations. I'm not at all, I'm purely wondering what she has based her thought/belief on.

I like to be as rational and logical as possible, so I like to know things from all possible perspectives aswell. Yet it seems most people prefer not to, they believe/think something and they stick to it, they don't even really care why they do or if there may be a different or even better way to view something.
I am roughly the same way! I have found that I either "turn on" or "turn off" the prodding side of me. It takes a while, but you can often slowly see which people would be annoyed or"bugged" by your in-depth questions. I have noticed the Thinkers to be more receptive to in-depth questions, although I have a few Feeling friends who have a mild interest in them. To give you an example, I have an INFJ friend who absolutely does NOT like to be asked prodding questions. She will literally change the subject on the spot or quiet up (essentially telling me it is not O.K. to do that). On the other hand, I have an ExFx friend who doesn't seem to mind them, and rather enjoys them at some points! So, you aren't alone!
 

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Me = "Why can't we do that?"
What I mean = "I don't see why you ruled that out. If you could explain your thinking behind it, I'll probably be perfectly happy with it."
What they hear = "WHAT THE HELL? You're an IDIOT. You're quite clearly wrong about everything. I don't want to listen to your crap. YOU'RE NOT THE BOSS OF ME! You think you have some sort of AUTHORITY? F**K OFF! I'LL DO IT IF I WANT TO! It's not even that I want to do it. I just want to be annoying. Is it working? Of course it is! Look at the size of the vein on your forehead!"
 

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I'm the same. I don't see it as a bad thing. People should talk more about the things that matter. I like to cut the crap anyway, its strength to anyone who can meet me on that level.
 

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I poke a bit, then leave it if they start getting defensive. I am a strong believer that everyone is entitled to their opinion and/or faith.
 

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Well that explains why an INTP I was dating on the very first conversation started asking me to clarify what I mean by "open-minded" and then moved on to asking whether holding religious convictions conflicted with being respectful and open-minded or alternatively whether have strong atheistic convictions could be classed under same. You guys don't like to waste any time eh?

I am usually very curious about people, but at the same time also aware of social expectations for conversations, so consider that these kinds of questions can wait until a bit later and just try to pick up on subtle cues at the beginning.
 

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I'm like that sometimes, but some people I know better and I know when to stop with them..unless my intention is to be a nuisance..
Also, sometimes I do things that I know might not end well just out of curiosity. I need to know how bad of a idea it really is and/or maybe I need to know how others will be affected by the activity I was doing..
 

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I would like to congratulate you on the hilarious title :proud:

Now, I may not be an INTP, but I have lived with two for most of my life (all of it actually).
And, from what I have observed over the many years are that INTPs are extremely curious individuals
they love to learn, probe, question and debate.
Sometimes it can be annoying, frustrating and down right upsetting.

But I’ve come to accept it and actually enjoy watching my mum and sister go at it in a debate.
I've learnt a lot from these two INTPs because they were curious! (Especially because my sister showed me MBTI!)
But my point is, please don’t change your curious nature, it may interfere, but it has great effect in helping other people!


:wink:
 

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'Curiosity killed the INTP'

My mother once told me that as a toddler she caught me trying to put my fingers inside the power sockets. She told me off.

A few days later she noticed I was doing the same thing. This time however I was telling myself off. As I moved my fingers closer and closer to the socket I would be saying 'no, no' and shaking my head.

There are many other dangerous things I did as a curious child... in-fact it's amazing I've made it this far in life.
 

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l have a lack of curiousity about most people TBH.

l have a lot of curiousity concerning humanity at large, rarely individuals. When l do, l will ask them about themselves. l can tell what's appropriate though, and generally if we like each other it won't be an issue and they'll feel comfortable.

l gain most of my knowledge about others from quiet observation, if at some point l l desire further exploration, l talk to them more :proud:

With my own interests, l'll research any topic without putting any thought into it. l think l do come out feeling cynical from never really sticking to any kind of beliefs that cold give me security, but l get over it.
 

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Does your curiosity cross personal boundaries and annoy or disturb the people around you? Is this an INTP trait or a trait of other types? Do INTPs run into this problem? How do you handle the situation?

I’m too goddamn curious about everything. I ask questions about everything and apply the same methods to myself, which occasionally leads me to view life in a very cynical and depressing way.

Sometimes I don’t understand when to stop prodding and I constantly want to know why other people believe or act in certain ways, which ends up irritating them, because they believe I’m challenging their authority or attempting to debate, but I really want to understand what their reasons are.

It seems most people hold strong beliefs and instead of discussing these subjects in an open and honest way, they prefer to remain adamant and not explore other possibilities.

However, perhaps I am approaching them too bluntly, by cutting out the small talk and diving straight into meaningful conversation. I have no right to interfere with people, even if I am friends with them, but I am too goddamn curious about why things are the way they are.

/end slobbering rant :mellow:
I could have written this myself.
 

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Does your curiosity cross personal boundaries and annoy or disturb the people around you? Is this an INTP trait or a trait of other types? Do INTPs run into this problem? How do you handle the situation?
Yes. Anyone can be curious, INTPs especially since we value competence. Just keep doing what comes natural, can't fight the beast.
I’m too goddamn curious about everything. I ask questions about everything and apply the same methods to myself, which occasionally leads me to view life in a very cynical and depressing way.
If people ask me why I'm depressed, I tell them it's because I see the world for what it is. I see humanity as a sad sad race.
Sometimes I don’t understand when to stop prodding and I constantly want to know why other people believe or act in certain ways, which ends up irritating them, because they believe I’m challenging their authority or attempting to debate, but I really want to understand what their reasons are.
Haha, yup. People HATE me for that. I just want to know why, I want to know the truth.
It seems most people hold strong beliefs and instead of discussing these subjects in an open and honest way, they prefer to remain adamant and not explore other possibilities.
A lot of people don't care for this quote, but "It's of an educated mind to entertain a thought without full excepting it."-Aristotle. Look people, aren't really strong in what they want to believe, so they rather not ask questions that will shake their faith. Choice ignorance is the greatest sins in my eyes.
However, perhaps I am approaching them too bluntly, by cutting out the small talk and diving straight into meaningful conversation. I have no right to interfere with people, even if I am friends with them, but I am too goddamn curious about why things are the way they are.
I don't like small talk. I have only one friend, one person in this whole world I can have a serious conversation with. Unfortunately neither of us have much time to talk, her being a motivated, independent ENTJ and I, not being able to take a measly 12 units without being overly stressed. Curiosity drives my short attention span when I should be writing an essay. Curiosity is killing my education. I'm that type of person that would go to look up the time, but got detracted by the thought of how time began, then looked up how the speed of light was measured... etc. Damn...
 

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Questioning people's integrity/authority is the only fun I get out of people.

Out of strangers anyway.

So far I haven't been beaten up. Must be doing something right.

Too bad I typically can't remember 'nething the day after, or few minutes after.
 

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Does your curiosity cross personal boundaries and annoy or disturb the people around you? Is this an INTP trait or a trait of other types? Do INTPs run into this problem? How do you handle the situation?
I actually developed a decent sense of not crossing boundaries when I was young, but i still watch other INTPs trigger the proximity alerts all the time -- I can see someone's hackles go up almost immediately, while the INTP will blunder forward completely oblivious to all the warning sensors going off. I think it's just a matter of examining the responses you get back, learning what they mean, then deciding that you desire to respect them, and practicing doing so in order to build up some skill at it.

My worst offenses when younger were mostly just either telling them waaaay too much about myself (things that didn't bother me to share, but some people would consider very personal) or else asking them questions in areas they felt uncomfortable about. I wasn't intentionally trying to pry or be nosy or create a conflict, they just had assumptions about what was "proper" that differed from mine, but I figured it all out soon enough and I guess have a methodology in place of how to approach people now.

I’m too goddamn curious about everything. I ask questions about everything and apply the same methods to myself, which occasionally leads me to view life in a very cynical and depressing way.
That's one thing some non-INTPs don't understand; we're not just that way with others, we're that way with ourselves too... and often worst. So we're not expecting special treatment or protection, we're just operating as we act within our own heads.

Sometimes I don’t understand when to stop prodding and I constantly want to know why other people believe or act in certain ways, which ends up irritating them, because they believe I’m challenging their authority or attempting to debate, but I really want to understand what their reasons are.
Which is admirable, but if you have to prod, often you won't get what you want anyway. That's the problem. You can push as much as you want, but if someone is offended/doesn't want to talk about it, prodding will just make them less likely to respond in a useful way. Meanwhile, respecting their space offers future openings that can be used to go deeper.

It seems most people hold strong beliefs and instead of discussing these subjects in an open and honest way, they prefer to remain adamant and not explore other possibilities.
They do cling to what they know, rather than being open; however, inside, they are still hearing what you're saying. I've seen people with a firm outer opinion, after hearing some arguments, the next day will completely change their mind. They're just feeling like they need to always have an opinion, so they cling to their old one until they can jump ship.

However, perhaps I am approaching them too bluntly, by cutting out the small talk and diving straight into meaningful conversation. I have no right to interfere with people, even if I am friends with them, but I am too goddamn curious about why things are the way they are.
Some people need that small talk in order to build trust before opening up with the big stuff.
 
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