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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
According to this: Famous ENTPs - CelebrityTypes.com ENTP's are somewhat linked to the Dependent Personality. Those with DPD are prone to....

Avoiding being alone
Avoiding personal responsibility
Becoming easily hurt by criticism or disapproval
Becoming overly focused on fears of being abandoned
Becoming very passive in relationships
Feeling very upset or helpless when relationships end
Having difficulty making decisions without support from others
Having problems expressing disagreements with others

Dependent personality disorder: MedlinePlus Medical Encyclopedia

Is it true??
 

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No. Not at all.
For me anyway.
No one likes being abandoned. I think everyone will struggle with needing support from others, or not wanting to be alone.
Do I think I experience any of this stuff more than other people?
Nope. If anything I cope with this stuff better than most.
Some of this applies, sure. But I just like to remember a "Do you have ADD?" checklist thing that once asked "Does your mind wonder while doing boring tasks?"
As if there are people who stay 100% focused on dull things.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
@sighcantthinkofaname Refusing to take responsibility sounds like Si inferior while need for company sounds like unhealthy Fe.

I think not wanting to be alone is a mix of environment and age. In my case, I'm a teen and (sadly) like all teens I want a childhood full of modest social gatherings w/people I'm actually friends with. I wasn't given this as a child and I'm trying to hang out as much as possible and have a childhood before I become an adult.
 

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This doesn't sound at all like the mature, adult me and even most of it doesn't even sound like the young teen angst me except not wanting to be alone. Now I don't mind being alone and even enjoy it. This list sounds more like an ENFP. ENTPs are not the type to be complacent or afraid to argue. We are not ones to despair when a relationship ends. We are the pull the Band-Aid off quick type which has been discussed a lot on this forum. Even criticism doesn't bother me long (of course everyone feels a little hurt by it, but not dwell on it). I was more likely not to fess up to personal responsibility when I was younger, but I know from having kids, that is common no matter what the personality type in most kids. "Not me" is another child in this household apparently because he gets blamed a lot.

The funniest thing on this list is the difficulty making decisions without support. My husband and I have had active arguments about this because I was making important decisions without consulting him. He hems and hahs about stuff so I would just do it. I really had to work on not doing it. I have more issues with small decisions like where should be go to eat mainly because it really does not matter to me and my husband usually does have an opinion and is a pain in the butt if we do not go where he was craving.
 
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According to this: Famous ENTPs - CelebrityTypes.com ENTP's are somewhat linked to the Dependent Personality. Those with DPD are prone to....

Avoiding being alone
Avoiding personal responsibility
Becoming easily hurt by criticism or disapproval
Becoming overly focused on fears of being abandoned
Becoming very passive in relationships
Feeling very upset or helpless when relationships end
Having difficulty making decisions without support from others
Having problems expressing disagreements with others

Dependent personality disorder: MedlinePlus Medical Encyclopedia

Is it true??
I don't have a problem with any of those. And if I think about fucked up, teenaged me... I didn't have a problem with any of those back then either. I used to procrastinate an awful lot, but I never blamed anybody else for my inability to get shit done or pretended that the fault wasn't mine alone. Does that go under "avoiding personal responsibility?"I think not really.
 
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I could see someone who is Fe dom and maybe got burned, bad relationship, trying to be more of a thinker but really the are Fe dom - and this (op) sounds fitting to describe that.

It's not that we don't trust our own judgement, we just hate to close a door sometimes and unrealistically try to keep options open.
Can't see feeling helpless about a relationship ending, or trouble with voicing a disagreement, easily offended -not.
 

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Dependent? I've lost count of how many times I desperately attempt to avoid being with other people. We aren't called the most introverted extroverts for nothing.

"Having problems expressing disagreements with others" I don't think there is the slightest possibility that this is true for ENTPs at all. Our reputation is basically built on arguing and causing conflict
 
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As the article you mentioned says, the lack of Si makes me us sweat the small stuff. That can lead to overthinking, and insecurity, and possibly DPD for some.
I definitely don't like being alone, Im an extrovert, I become depressed when I'm alone and lonely.
There had been times where I avoided personal responsibility and depended on others to make decisions for me. That was mainly because I hadnt learnt to trust my intuition - the voice in the back of my head. And lets face it, that voice can seem pretty illogical to most people. -> insecurity for the ENTP.
Being passive and fear of abandonment, again, I can see an unhealthy ENTP doing all that. Passive agressiveness and fear, because it's near impossible for us to connect to other people. Which is what we crave most.
Same with having difficulty with disagrements. We're cool with conflict and arguing, as long as it's impersonal, about things and ideas. When conflict gets emotional, an unhealthy ENTP would either run away or act passive agressive. But even healthy ones may shy away from it, simply because we don't know how to face emotional conflict, and we'd rather not face it at all.
 

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Passive agression? no way is that an ENTP thing. I would say though, when it comes to saying no, sometimes I just put that off and hope somebody doesn't pursue it - whatever. But that is not passive agressive. Agression - you want a specific something and you don't have the balls to be honest. The ENTP fade out is more like you become indifferent but you don't want to be outright mean or anything. And your not sure if something matters to others either way so you hope it will just go away. Passive aggressive you hope to provoke something while playing chicken shit - I won't give in to that kind of behavior and I don't do it.

If I must deal with an emotionally difficult moody person who won't stay on topic, lies, and resorts to name calling, I have handled these situations with writing notes. It just makes sense to me. I will spell out what I am willing and not willing to do to mend a situation - I will say it nice - and they can take it or leave it. I don't say things I don't mean and I don't burn a bridge without being fully willing and able to walk away.

About not taking responsibility - for the J types on this thread - Don't see how si has anything to do with this. As an INTJ maybe you just can't imagine I honestly decide to not care about something you think I "should" care about. It may not be on my list, you care about it you do it.
Or you can negotiate with me why this is important to you if it is any of your business because it affects you. You thinking I did not do "the right" thing does not make me irresponsible, maybe it just makes me less neurotic than you.

Correction - young entp's can do things like forget to pay a bill (could involve inferior si) but this is not about making others fix our lives. Entp's need to figure out self management methods that fit them and organizing tools pre-made out there may not be great for us. It takes maturity and practice to recognize when what we have worked out in theory hasn't synced up with practical reality, which compromises are worth making and so on.
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
@psychedelicmango Difficulty expressing disagreement with others sounds like something my ENTP crush goes through (at least before but now I don't know). I remember someone making a sexist comment to her when she was beating me in a game and she didn't want to play anymore since there were other guys around. She also wasn't comfortable with my vocal enthusiasm when I bought 40 dicks...

Building Facade Commercial building Real estate Mixed-use
(by that I mean stocks. I was hoping for them to rise :wink:)
 

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@psychedelicmango Difficulty expressing disagreement with others sounds like something my ENTP crush goes through (at least before but now I don't know). I remember someone making a sexist comment to her when she was beating me in a game and she didn't want to play anymore since there were other guys around. She also wasn't comfortable with my vocal enthusiasm when I bought 40 dicks...

View attachment 292354
(by that I mean stocks. I was hoping for them to rise :wink:)
LOL.

I would say there is a difference to expressing opinion and actually having an opinion that you care about. I find that I generally don't care about some of the day to day stuff and other people have a strong opinion. If I actually want to do something else or have a strong opinion, I will express it. I'm very go with the flow and will genuinely enjoy myself anyway so I would rather defer because the person I am with will be a pain in the ass if we don't do what they want to do and I don't really care.

As far as the game thing, my father is an INTJ and I can tell you that beating him at a game is tough to do and a fun feat; however, he is not fun to be around if you do beat him. She most likely was feeding off of how you were reacting (maybe subconsciously) or seeing that the guys were starting to tease which might change the mood of the situation, so she stopped playing rather than keep it up. I know personally, I want to have fun when I am out and if my significant other is moody or we are in a situation where he could get irritated quickly, I would most likely stop I was doing since the game is not fun to me any more if the person I am with is upset. It's a matter of reading the situation and picking your battles. A healthy ENTP is not going to be argumentative for the sake of arguing when the situation does not call for it. Her reacting most likely would have changed the mood of the evening that she might have been enjoying and she would rather be quiet than disrupt it. If she is anything like me, she probably might have been bothered by it for a few minutes and then moved on and didn't think of it again.

Also, I work in an exceptionally male dominated field with mostly male clients and subcontractors. I have learned that reacting to sexist comments by directly addressing them around a group of guys is not the way to deal with it. You unfortunately come across as an emotional bitch when you react. As long as it is not a truly offensive comment directly at me (when it is personal or sexual in nature), I will let them joke and maybe make comments in a joking way back. I have; however, pulled people aside later when the testosterone died down and explained why it is not cool to say what they said if it something to be addressed.
 

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LOL.

I would say there is a difference to expressing opinion and actually having an opinion that you care about. I find that I generally don't care about some of the day to day stuff and other people have a strong opinion. If I actually want to do something else or have a strong opinion, I will express it. I'm very go with the flow and will genuinely enjoy myself anyway so I would rather defer because the person I am with will be a pain in the ass if we don't do what they want to do and I don't really care.

As far as the game thing, my father is an INTJ and I can tell you that beating him at a game is tough to do and a fun feat; however, he is not fun to be around if you do beat him. She most likely was feeding off of how you were reacting (maybe subconsciously) or seeing that the guys were starting to tease which might change the mood of the situation, so she stopped playing rather than keep it up. I know personally, I want to have fun when I am out and if my significant other is moody or we are in a situation where he could get irritated quickly, I would most likely stop I was doing since the game is not fun to me any more if the person I am with is upset. It's a matter of reading the situation and picking your battles. A healthy ENTP is not going to be argumentative for the sake of arguing when the situation does not call for it. Her reacting most likely would have changed the mood of the evening that she might have been enjoying and she would rather be quiet than disrupt it. If she is anything like me, she probably might have been bothered by it for a few minutes and then moved on and didn't think of it again.

Also, I work in an exceptionally male dominated field with mostly male clients and subcontractors. I have learned that reacting to sexist comments by directly addressing them around a group of guys is not the way to deal with it. You unfortunately come across as an emotional bitch when you react. As long as it is not a truly offensive comment directly at me (when it is personal or sexual in nature), I will let them joke and maybe make comments in a joking way back. I have; however, pulled people aside later when the testosterone died down and explained why it is not cool to say what they said if it something to be addressed.
Sometimes people don't understand if I say something doesn't matter it means I am really fine either way. Or, . . . .jeeze I'm not sure what the problem is - being easy going is bad? I'm supposed to jerk you around about small stuff because it proves I care? I need someone to give me bitch lessons. If something matters to me - I've usually sold others on it before I even know thats what I did.

Also, testosterone doesn't have to be the problem to do what you did. I get what you are saying. It is always best to put careful wording to something you think could be an ongoing issue - and say it when not in the heat of the moment.
I agonize over handling an issue like this well; but I don't call that a problem with conflict. Basically you end up saying in situation E it will be better if you do A and not B and here is why. You have to give someone a path to make things good. You cant just react to someone having "bad" behavior (something counterproductive, or even something you just don't like) - it won't fix anything to just react..

@JA Grey, I could see the ENTP crush's being reactionary on you if you touched a nerve about something that seemed like already a reoccurring problem for her. If I had an issue with someone that I was surprised and hadn't figured out how to handle yet, and then got into something similar with someone else - I could end up going off about it.
 

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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
@JA Grey, I could see the ENTP crush's being reactionary on you if you touched a nerve about something that seemed like already a reoccurring problem for her. If I had an issue with someone that I was surprised and hadn't figured out how to handle yet, and then got into something similar with someone else - I could end up going off about it.

that sounds like an si problem. Having negative past associations with something is often seen as si (that's why some say sj's are racist). Si inferior?

Also forgot to mention that she has an esfj dad. Maybe that's the reason she may not de completely direct.
 

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Si is at base - sensual. Comparison of past and future is what you do without even knowing it when you are Si dom. This is how you arive at the si dom needing a map from past experience. They gradually gain experience and base everything on that - sometimes (maddeningly) they need a million exposures or established precedent to accept anything as legit.

Ti is what wants to maintain internal order - I must have a policy or the right words to define things (in my own file system). Ne imagines possibilities, jumps to conclusions - several at one time. If I have several not fully processed social interactions in my head (the introverted extrovert thing) - I need processing time or it will feel like overload. The Ne Ti part of me will naturally take in new information and if something is puzzling, or disruptive, I automatically think "is this incidental ?" - therefore not requiring a solution OR does this need processing.

Maybe it's because I'm older but Inferior Si is no big deal. It might be a big deal if my life required me to be a neat freak or if I didn't have spell check.

Sexism or being put in a box IS a big deal for ENTP females, and often a one-upmanship game we can't win. We like verbal sparring but on this one - even if we win we loose - or it seems that way sometimes. This isn't inferior anything - she just needs to figure out how she wants to handle it. We don't get satisfaction from doing the INTJ death stare.
 

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@psychedelicmango Difficulty expressing disagreement with others sounds like something my ENTP crush goes through (at least before but now I don't know). I remember someone making a sexist comment to her when she was beating me in a game and she didn't want to play anymore since there were other guys around. She also wasn't comfortable with my vocal enthusiasm when I bought 40 dicks...

View attachment 292354
(by that I mean stocks. I was hoping for them to rise :wink:)
Seriously. :laughing:

Yep, as I said, ENTPs usually don't like personal/emotional conflict or drama. And some fights just aren't worth fighting. Your crush might have sensed that and simply distanced herself from those guys. If I argued every single time someone made a sexist/ignorant/simply stupid comment about me, I'd be an angry, unhappy person.
That being said, something I hear a lot from other types about ENTPs, and I have to agree unfortunaltely is that we care about shit, even if we tell you otherwise. Fe is a bitch. :tongue:


So, on the topic of whether a mentally unhealthy ENTP could be diagnosed with DPD, I can see how some could; like an enneagram 6 ENTP; an 8 would probably be more unlikely to develop such a disorde. Personally, I usually become an angry mess, either avoiding people, or lashing out at them, but I dont think I really have a personality disorder, so I can't talk from experience.
The page in your link states some disorders that are likely to develop in ENTPs, that doesn't mean that a normal functioning ENTP has to have traits of these disorders or that an unhealthy one can't have other mental health issues or disorders other than antisocial or narcissistic PD. People are too complex for that.
 

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ENTPs are almost nothing like people with DPD, really. Maybe a couple of similarities. This is mostly just talking about my experience, but also from some of the ENTP people I know. When I was younger, I could have easily been diagnosed with DPD, but I was kinda going through a bad time.
Avoiding being alone- I'm not sure, however I can easily spend time alone. I think most ENTPs are okay with being alone. We also like people, but we don't avoid being alone. We may even avoid not being alone.
Avoiding personal responsibility- Alright- maybe. I think ENTPs follow a play first, work later kind of mindset most of the time.
Becoming easily hurt by criticism or disapproval- Nah, I don't think ENTPs are very hurt by this at all. Maybe a little bit, but not easily hurt. ENTPs are the ones often doing the criticism. Not to be rude tho.
Becoming overly focused on fears of being abandoned- No.
Becoming very passive in relationships- I guess. I mean, often times I dont even want to do anything with anyone, but I am definitely not afraid to be, aggressive? I guess in relationships.
Feeling very upset or helpless when relationships end- It depends on the relationship. But I personally move on quickly. I can live without one person leaving.
Having difficulty making decisions without support from others- We may take our time making decisions, or not at all, but we usually don't need help from others. I personally can be very indecisive, but I also make decisions without thinking at all.
Having problems expressing disagreements with others- Oh no. Nooot at all.
 

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@JA Grey, if your girlfriend thinks you are crude or chauvinistic and finds this attitude to be a significant part of who you are - she might walk away. This is not a weakness or a problem about dealing with anything. There is nothing to say or do about this (the cat is out of the bag). If you change your behavior to impress or keep her - it's like cheating on a test. She's not deliberately testing you, she's not manipulating you and she's not going to go along with attitudes she finds offensive. Attitude is whatever it is - and it is not an entp's job to fix something like this - we accept people the way they are - or else we don't.

But if she is anything like me, she puts thought into weather anything should be said or not - and then will let it go; untill or unless it seems like a pattern - meaning she starts to loose respect for, or loose interest in you. In that case she will move on.

This would not be about you reading her mind, this would be her surmising an incompatibility.
We listen, we observe how people are, and we make choices. With our hesitation to officially close a door it might be more like a fade out than a break up. -Do you see the difference of what I'm saying here? incidental behaviors can be fixed, misunderstandings can be cleared up, but I'm not going to be so swoony over what somebody looks like that I miss cues that tell me who the person is.

I'm not saying you are a bad person, I'm saying in her mind there may be a little red flag. This isn't fatal but it just is whatever it is and nothing to talk about, just to watch for.
 

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I can relate, but I think it has more to do with a severely neglectful/abusive family than my MBTI type.
 
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