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I need to get me some Te.
I'm sick of being a pushover, sick of being unable to stop emotionally involving in absolutely everything, sick of being unrealistic and it coming back to bite me in the ass, and everything else that goes with weak T.

For those older ENFP's, what things would you say are essential to a healthy development of Te?
From Te users, any advice?
 

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I'm going to give it to you straight; practice "stop, breathe, think, then do". You know all those feelings? Ignore them; they're not helpful; paying attention to what is helpful - not to what it just "feels" like. Then do it. Do the hard stuff.

Yes, you know. Doing the hard and uncomfortable stuff; attend the boring details, taking time to reflect on what is actually happening, not just on what you want to happen or want it to be like.

Thinking, stopping and reflecting - then actually doing - gets you good things, but it is not easy. Good luck :)
 
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I need to get me some Te.
I'm sick of being a pushover,
This is not necessarily related to a lack of Te, but more likely a lack of proper boundaries. You may need to re-evaluate values that you have automatically absorbed from your environment or social systems. Run them through your Fi to see if they are true. Where do you see yourself in relation to other people that puts you in a one-down position to be "pushed over?"

sick of being unable to stop emotionally involving in absolutely everything
This may be unrealistic. You're going to have feelings. I would recommend that you work through them before reacting so that you can respond appropriately to situations. This actually takes time and maturity, but you can definitely work towards it.

sick of being unrealistic and it coming back to bite me in the ass, and everything else that goes with weak T.
Then develop your logic. Work through what is realistic in a given circumstance. Adopt a Murphy's Law mentality when it comes to life and situations, i.e. What could go wrong? Doing so has actually helped me think and consider with Ne the possibilities that I wouldn't have considered naturally. I've found that it helps balance the positive, future-looking aspect of my personality.

For those older ENFP's, what things would you say are essential to a healthy development of Te?
I was motivated to develop Te because I have a desire to be understood and for my words to have impact. I want to be taken seriously. So, I work and revise and practice presenting sound arguments that appeal on more than just an emotional level.

I'm going to give it to you straight; practice "stop, breathe, think, then do".
Good advice.

You know all those feelings? Ignore them; they're not helpful;
Bad advice.

You may as well cripple a large part of your brain (as an ENFP) to ignore your feelings. Pause and evaluate them. What warnings are they giving you? What truths are they telling you? Dig deeper for the reason behind them so they can help inform your decisions. If they are baseless, then you will have at least dealt with them so they are not longer bothering you. You cannot be at your best when you have unresolved feelings.
Keep in mind that emotions may hint to unrelated or to interrelated issues, and when you deal with them, you often grow as an individual.
 

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I need to get me some Te.
I'm sick of being a pushover, sick of being unable to stop emotionally involving in absolutely everything, sick of being unrealistic and it coming back to bite me in the ass, and everything else that goes with weak T.

For those older ENFP's, what things would you say are essential to a healthy development of Te?
From Te users, any advice?
Well, you have to realize that if Jungian theory is true, then you're Te will always be weaker than your Ne-Fi. I notice that you're talking about using Te in relation to your personal decisions, and not reorganizing the fridge. I have strong Te, but it does take work for me to use it, it's not always 'on'. When I think about it, I use some tricks to turn it 'on'.

Rule 1: Employ judgemental boredom (Ne).
I look for patterns of repetition in my life, ones I don't like, and I just get so damned bored with myself. Being boring and predictable is a grave ENFP sin, don't do it.

Rule 2: Give yourself a bad-judgement valve (more Ne).
Restrained ENFPs are a bad thing, they're like pressure cookers, anything is better. Give yourself a bad out. Okay, so you like the wild rollercoaster ride that goes with making bad decisions. So, just go ahead and do it, *just don't do it in the same way*, that is *boring* and you learn nothing new. And have an exit strategy and stick to it, take some time and set limits, plan it it. It's a fun night in.

Rule 3: People are dirty Animals (Fi).
Devalue yourself and others. It's fine. Remember, Fluffy is just an animal, and you love him just the same, even when when he bites you because he feeling like a dick today. Other people are the same, we have Skinneresk reactions, we have histories, we are looking out for number 1. When Sally is a dick to you, it's because she's gotta do what she has to do. And... you're a dick like that too, so you can totally relate. Empathize.

Rule 4: Build an Amusement Park (Te)
It's a fun park! Put those tigers in cages. Keep those scary-fun people in the haunted house and visit them when you feel like having a scare. When you're tired and need a break, sit with your date in the tunnel of love. Fun parks are fun because they're structured, imagine having the tiger in the tunnel of love... not so fun. You have to be able to build separations, but may as well make it an attraction.

Disclaimer: I am pulling this out of my ass, but it sounds pretty solid, doesn't it?
 

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You may as well cripple a large part of your brain (as an ENFP) to ignore your feelings. Pause and evaluate them. What warnings are they giving you? What truths are they telling you? Dig deeper for the reason behind them so they can help inform your decisions. If they are baseless, then you will have at least dealt with them so they are not longer bothering you. You cannot be at your best when you have unresolved feelings.
Keep in mind that emotions may hint to unrelated or to interrelated issues, and when you deal with them, you often grow as an individual.
Thank you! This is much better put in than I did; ^ that was what I meant but I didn't say well. Don't automatically give primacy and privilege to your feelings. They are just one way of knowing your world. They may not provide the most useful information. Think and do, and look for other evidence, ideally especially for disconfirming evidence.
 
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I use Te mostly when I am leading something. In particular for me, leading a group of musicians in learning/performing a song and arranging the parts is its most noticeable use. Doing this has forced me to gain leadership skills and I am slowly but surely learning how to tell someone when they are wrong and to get back in their place. So just use of the function develops it. I suggest thinking of something you really love, and finding some incarnation of it that requires organization. If your Te is particularly undeveloped it will be uncomfortable, but as it develops you will become more comfortable as an overall person.
 

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@Hurricane Well, you have to realize that if Jungian theory is true, then you're Te will always be weaker than your Ne-Fi. I notice that you're talking about using Te in relation to your personal decisions, and not reorganizing the fridge. I have strong Te, but it does take work for me to use it, it's not always 'on'. When I think about it, I use some tricks to turn it 'on'.

Not true

Te will not always be weaker than Ne-Fi, it depends on what stage of development. Te kicks in later in ( over 25 ) and should be nicely developed by the time you're over 30.

And to the OP, your Te doesn't play a role in what you've described. Doing silly things has nothing to do with lack of Te and more to do with energized Ne. There will come a point that your Fi will have enough data stored you will be able to make rational decisions quicker. As ENFP we gather and recognize our personal values that trigger our Fi, and from connecting with them moment by moment we become familiar with what cause our knee jerk reactions. Our Si kicks in and reminds us of a previous experience that can relate to the emotion, within seconds it tells us fight or flight. That all sounds weird i know, ha o_O but....So basically RWAR, or game on, bring it .
 
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