[curious0610]

I often think about the dissonance between reality and my ideals, and I tend to get stuck in a rut about this. Sometimes, it seems like I'm taking steps to actively try and make my idealism my reality. Other times, I think that I resignedly try and "accept" reality, but then life gets bleak, so I need to somehow constantly pursue making my ideals a reality. It seems that I can't survive by completely accepting reality "as is," but need to be working towards my ideals.

Someone I know (unknown type...) talked to me about this.. how we can step back, and theoretically be more constructive by changing the way we think about things and how we approach this dissonance. He talks about accepting reality, but making our own ideals within reality (if that makes sense). Anyway wanted to hear all your thoughts about this, if you relate, if you have different or similar perceptions, etc.

 

[Linus]

Another good thing to do would be to analyze where we get our ideals
Are they formed by any beliefs or fears ?
If we change those beliefs, remove the fears does the future become more hopeful?
Then maybe we can afford to be more flexible
and we can let go of that one ideal we think we have to have, which just makes us more unhappy by noticing how we still don't have that ideal. It might get easier to live in the present

 

[curious0610]

im bringing this thread back.

 

[bumble]

I used to have more problems whit this before, i wanted to get people to realize what we could do, how things wold be, if only they would think like this or like that... and never realized that they dont want to. so Im more selfich now, dont try so hard to get anyone hwo dont want to change to do so. And thats because Ive learnd more about reality (ore how most othe people see it) Its not that bad, but you cant go bang your head into every thing you think is wrong, to depressive. But deep inside I still have a kind of a picture (ideal) waiting for the time and the place, to make things come true.. Guess I have taken that "stepp back", and looking for a not so "painful" way...

 

[PaulH]

I have learned to be more flexible. something else I have learned is that people hold different values and ideals and that trying to impose my own is somewhat arrogant.

By far the biggest lesson I have learned is that in many situations people are fully aware of the gap between ideal and reality but don't know how to bridge it. Idealist preaching in those situations tends not to be effective unless they have a practical way forward to offer...... (yep I have learned that one the hard way :sad

 

[lirulin]

I find it motivating. If there were no dissonance, I would have nothing to do. Bo-ring.

 

[etherealuntouaswithin]

the reality to which serves in prevalence imparts within me a perplexity that inspires a loathsome frustration..man appears(to my sight) severed from the composite of aspirational ideal that, i fear, will accomplish nil by way of truth in act...and so that to which you feel is certainly shared, although the "reality" we speak of may in fact not be as we believe it to be(now that i think about it )..

 

[Sedna90377]

This is an interesting one. Taking steps to make your idealism reality, is in a nutshell, the definition of what life is. It's the comparison between what you think, and what you experience or see, that it gets confusing. It seems like what's going on here is that you feel you have life understood as it is, and are looking to use your ideals as a challenge of some sort. Almost as if your ideals are the MEANING of your life. For example...

It seems that I can't survive by completely accepting reality "as is," but need to be working towards my ideals.

I take it this means that unless you're making what you think and feel a reality, you feel as if you're watching life unfold from a distance, instead of being part of it. Huh. I can't say I relate as an INTP (for us it's analyze, understand, move on :laughing, but it sounds like that has quite a bit of creative potential. I should definitely steal that page out of the INFJ handbook! :tongue:

 

[etherealuntouaswithin]

~This is an interesting one. Taking steps to make your idealism reality, is in a nutshell, the definition of what life is. It's the comparison between what you think, and what you experience or see, that it gets confusing. It seems like what's going on here is that you feel you have life understood as it is, and are looking to use your ideals as a challenge of some sort. Almost as if your ideals are the MEANING of your life~tis nothing short of Excellence

~although the "reality" we speak of may in fact not be as we believe it to be(now that i think about it )..~