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Discussion Starter #1
I know a girl that tested as ESTJ, and I tested as INTP. I was reading off what my profile said, and one part was "I don't like frivolous conversations" and she "oh, well that's all I do."

But I've been reading this forum and it seems that ESTJs don't like frivolous conversations.

A lot of the other stuff I've read here fits her pretty well though, such as being direct when they're interested in you, or open and honest.
 

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If I were surrounded by my friends and we're just chillin and talking about silly things, I don't mind doing frivolous conversation. But if it were being a constant conversation everytime me and my friends hanging out, I sure do dislike it.

It's same with gossip. It's fun to talk about other people once in a while. But if gossiping became a major point in every conversation, then I would just left. I have better things to do and I have plans to achieve, I don't have time and I don't want to waste my precious time only for digging unimportant subjects.
 
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I love frivolous conversation, makes me laugh! I can't be serious all the time, it's draining and depressing.

I have a tendency to find rude things and out-of-character behaviour hilarious :crazy:
 

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Discussion Starter #5 (Edited)
When she was reading the little profile that was only a few sentences, she said it fit her exactly. But she has also said that she procrastinates a lot. It seems like that's not an ESTJ thing?
 

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I'm the opposite type and so do I XD
I think this is one of the most universal forms of humor..
Tawa, did you just contradict yourself? you don't find that funny, but you do really? :happy:

Most people I know don't find rude things funny actually....hmmm....maybe my side of the world where I am is different.
Mind you, I don't find the kind of Borat/Ali G funny....he makes me cringe!
 

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My brother was ESTJ, and I'm ISTP. We always found the same things funny. And he was just funny, period. Unbelievably funny...

As for frivolous conversations, well he could talk to anyone about anything; so if the situation called for frivolous, he was there. If it called for something philosophical, he was there too.
 

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I agree with Rousse, this inquiry does not fit just ESTJs. This is more about preferring extraverting vs introverting. I know ISFJs that can carry on frivolous conversatons for hours. I am just not one of them. Besides I used to post at INTPC and there are far more frivolous discussions there, than I can count. The same for INTJF.
 

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I tend to think that each type has its "deep" version and its "shallow" version. It would be a mistake to assume that all XXXXs are shallow just because the ones you know are, or vice versa.

Deep vs. shallow is one of life's many dichotomies. Both have their equivalents in nature, and both have a place in our day-to-day lives.
 

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I was a lot serious back then until I met this friend. I was way too serious until he's lightened me up and I started to not take what I said seriously and not notice this happening all at the same time. I don't like frivolous conversations. I think it's pointless. I have a friend that I talk to, whenever I'm serious, he's not. So I ask what exactly is the point of this conversation? It's going nowhere.

Sure, I lighten up to people who love to joke a lot and this put an influence on me.

I'm definitely more playful compared to before, and I think that this is a good change. Every now and then, I don't mind such conversations but I would mind it if I wanted an actual answer and I was serious, which is most of the time.
 

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When she was reading the little profile that was only a few sentences, she said it fit her exactly. But she has also said that she procrastinates a lot. It seems like that's not an ESTJ thing?
yes i'd say she's enfp. she's direct when she likes you, talks about absoluelty every topic under the sun, procrastinates. you read her a few lines and she's going "THAT'S ME THAT'S ME I'M PURE LIKE THAT" read her the enfp description see does that ring more of a bell.
 
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I think it depends on who you are talking with, and what the situation is. If I am talking to people I dont know very well, or in a situation where small talk or frivolous conversation is normal then I will do it. I'm not about to get deep with people I dont know. Participating or listening to that kind of conversation also allows me to figure out who someone is and then who I could probably develop a relationship with. I feel like if you're an ESTJ you are pretty social and so naturally frivolous talk is just a part of that. I dont hate it. If it was constant I would get really annoyed, but then again I cant be serious or deep all the time either, that's just very draining. Frivolous conversation is light and fluffy and fun usually, so no I dont hate it.


As for the procrastination thing...it depends on what you define as procrastination. If you are defining it as waiting until the very very very last minute, then no I am not that way. But waiting until the night before, sure I do that, or putting it off constantly, sure. I'll try to plan ahead and get things done a week ahead of time, but I'm all about the present, and planning that far ahead is just not for me.
 

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Will I try to make every conversation a productive experience? No, I do like to shoot the breeze sometimes because I tend to be pretty social. What you won't find me doing though is sitting in a coffee house debating abstract theories. It's not that I don't respect it; I just don't find any practical use for it. ESTJ are definitely not arm-chair philosophers.

For example, I imagine you, Jerick, as an INTP have a different motive for using this forum then I do. As career-minded/workaholic as this sounds, I'm using this forum to study different personality types so I can learn to identify them at work and manage/lead people efficiently. Pretty sickening isn't it?
 

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Will I try to make every conversation a productive experience? No, I do like to shoot the breeze sometimes because I tend to be pretty social. What you won't find me doing though is sitting in a coffee house debating abstract theories. It's not that I don't respect it; I just don't find any practical use for it. ESTJ are definitely not arm-chair philosophers.

For example, I imagine you, Jerick, as an INTP have a different motive for using this forum then I do. As career-minded/workaholic as this sounds, I'm using this forum to study different personality types so I can learn to identify them at work and manage/lead people efficiently. Pretty sickening isn't it?
They do argue that stuff, if it's their specialty. But I find it's more like a game to them, a leisurely activity.

From what I find, they do, but it usually has to do with them.
 

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Discussion Starter #16 (Edited)
If I was discussing something abstract, it would be something I'm interested in because it's a new idea that I've come across, not as a game. I have a theory that how people store memories has a large impact on their personality type, and INTP and ENTP have much more of the connective memory type and worse of other memory types. So when we come across a subject matter, our thoughts will branch off into a lot of different areas which will cause us to come across an idea we might want to discuss. That's where the creativity comes from.

We also tend to go for the abstract since reading a book that discusses a lot of terms won't stick in our minds as easily because of the way we store memories. I'd guess that NTPs are usually bad at remembering names, for example. But the abstract gives an opportunity for connective memory to really be useful because the systems are more complex with more unknowns that allow room for new ideas.


The reason I came to this forum is because I was trying to understand an ESTJ girl that was interested in me. And I also seem to get an inordinate amount of them, so I'm trying to figure out what the deal is with that. But after being here, I realized the usefulness for understanding where other people are coming from and what they're probably thinking. Plus, it's a complex system with a lot of unknowns that I enjoy exploring, of course.
 

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My sister is ESTJ, she loves to chat on the phone about everything. I have a hard time because I don't like small talk, especially on the phone. However, she is awesome and I love her dearly. We can hang out for hours and talk, I just hate the phone. Not sure if that's a ESTP thing or not.
 

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I don't like the phone much either....I like to see the person's face. Also, I don't like to small talk ALL the time. I LOVE to talk about things that matter that require some analysing, exchange ideas/views so I can expand my knowledge...mental stimulation is what really gets me excited :laughing:
 

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I think the problem here is the word Frvolous (did I spell it right? its late here.) To me frivolous means nothing is gained, or I'm waisting my time for nothing. Now if the word was non-serous, small talk, humorous then I have a different view.
 

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Discussion Starter #20
I think the actual wording of the description I read was, "they don't enjoy needless conversation." And she said to that, "oh, well that's all I do."
 
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