Yes and no. If I liked hanging out with someone, it had nothing to do with social status. I always thought social status was dumb.Hi! I am in the process of figuring out what type I am. ENFJ was not something I considered originally, but I find that I do relate to a lot of descriptions of the function order. The thing is, I am still very confused about the difference between Fi and Fe in the concrete world, even though I've read dozens of articles on the distinction.
From a VERY young age, I was concerned with being well-liked. I was always interested in maintaining friendships, always wanting to be one of the popular kids...But for some reason, was rejected by many of my peers since a young age. I was lucky though, because a girl on the second day of a new school in first grade came and asked me to be my friend and of course I accepted.
But she was the type who made friends, it seems, with anyone, especially the social loners; she made us sit with the most unpopular boy in the class during lunch. I hated it because everyone else would judge us. I did not want him around. So, the days when she was at home sick and not in school, I would try to ditch him and sit at another table.
This obsession with "popularity" continued even to my college years. I wanted to appear like I was part of the crowd. I would make decisions, sometimes really short-sighted ones, just because I was so concerned with how others perceived me.
It's only recently, tired of my depression due to my struggle at creating social relationships, that I began trying to accept and revel at the theory that maybe I am just really, really weird. And I should make friends with more weird people. however, I still enjoy it when I'm out and about and another person and I see someone acting out of the social norm, and we exchange that side glance of "Wow, what a weirdo". It makes me feel accepted.
So yeah, hopefully you can understand my dilemma! XD Does this resonate with you Fe-doms, or would you say this isn't how you process the social world?
I mean, I definitely wanted to be well-liked, but I despised social "caste systems" and what not. I didn't do things differently to seem popular—I did what I felt was best/right, and scoffed at the "popular people." I hated being judged because it felt wrong, not because I wanted to be popular. I wanted people to respect my differences and the differences of others. I guess you could say I was more idealistic and cared about how all people should be treated well—the only social influence I desired was seen by me as a means to spread my ideals and make the world a better place.