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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I contribute this to my ENFP-ness, well that and my lack of uber-masculinity,...I have girl legs so what?
But I'm straight, and people have tried to get me to "come out of the closet" and admit my taboo homoerotic nature. I'm not bashing the LGBT as a whole, just the one airhead sprinkle king with a pink boa around his neck. He's so arrogant he leaves me a voicemail saying I need to come out, and that everyone already knows I'm gay. Does this happen to other people, specifically ENFP guys?
 

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I contribute this to my ENFP-ness, well that and my lack of uber-masculinity,...I have girl legs so what?
But I'm straight, and people have tried to get me to "come out of the closet" and admit my taboo homoerotic nature. I'm not bashing the LGBT as a whole, just the one airhead sprinkle king with a pink boa around his neck. He's so arrogant he leaves me a voicemail saying I need to come out, and that everyone already knows I'm gay. Does this happen to other people, specifically ENFP guys?
OMG, this always happens to my male ENFP friend. In fact, so much so that he often jokes about it. But I kid you not, he truly is in love with the ladies. He just appears gay. He is in the arts. I met him doing musical theater together. He likes to paint, he has had plenty of gay roommates and friends. He owns a cat, he bakes cakes for his dates. He is NOT and never has been into one night stands because that is like "ew" to him. He craves emotional connection above all else. He is not into watching sports (although he did play football in high school) and right now he is spending a year on his own to "find himself". Yep, people tease him quite a bit.
 
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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Thank God! I was worried for a second that it was just me and that I was crazy and had some mental block. Yeah I was in musical theatre, I can bake, and would love to have a kitty. And because theatre was such a large influence on me, I broke away from my rigid "anti-homosexual" faith to a very open liberal "laissez faire" ideal.

Oh yeah sports are boring unless I'm in the mood.
 
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Thank God! I was worried for a second that it was just me and that I was crazy and had some mental block. Yeah I was in musical theatre, I can bake, and would love to have a kitty. And because theatre was such a large influence on me, I broke away from my rigid "anti-homosexual" faith to a very open liberal "laissez faire" ideal.

Oh yeah sports are boring unless I'm in the mood.
LOL - Yeah dude, when I first found these forums I was like "Yay! More gay guys who aren't gay!"

I love to bake and cook in general, love musicals, have three kitties, and while I'm not on stage my job is to teach groups of adults, so that kinda puts me in the spotlight. You're fine.
 
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I get asked if I'm bisexual and one guy asked if I date women, we also have a running joke in my friend group that I'm a raging lesbian, but really I'm heterosexual (at least, I'm as sure as any 18 year old can be).
 

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I had the rumor go around once when i was living in a residence with 25 girls and only 4-5 guys. I'm not all that feminine of a guy, but I guess between dressing sharp, not publicly hitting on the "girls-who-wanted-it" and solving everyone's relationship questions, the gossipy-ones just sorta assumed I swung the other way. Of course, the girls who I flirted with in private eventually put an end to that, but it still made for a couple funny conversations. Actually, when people think you're gay, it's a great time to compliment girls on their physical appearance. Even if it makes for a lot of blushing when they find out you're straight, it's an easy way altruistically boost their self-confidence.
 

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I'm the opposite, actually. Everyone automatically assumes I'm straight, despite the fact that I make no attempt to hide my sexuality (though I don't unnecessarily flaunt it either). I would think my tendency to openly flirt with girls is a dead give away, but I guess the whole "gay" stereotype still persists. In fact, I have a very hard time making it clear, and through my attempt at explanations, I've heard too many "Girlfriend as in, friend who is a girl?" "Anniversary? Of the day you guys became friends? (Wut)" "So you mean, you like girls, as in like, you like girls?" Do I have to go get a mullet and wear lumberjack plaids? Jesus Christ.

I guess that's the difference between female and male ENFPs. Stereotypically "NF-ish" behaviors are often generalized as "feminine" behavior (no idea why), and people tend to correlate the silly categorization of traditional "masculine" and "feminine" traits with sexual orientation. It's really quite stupid.
 

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People don't think I'm gay when they first meet me, but almost everyone says I have some very "Gay Qualities" once they know me.

It's stereotypical, of course, but I always take it as a compliment. For the most part Gay Men seem to be very fashion conscious, very good friends, confident, and good fun to be around.

I'd rather be taken for a gay fellow than for the opposite stereotype.

That said, it is quite rude of that man to leave messages on your answering machine of that nature.
 

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I guess that's the difference between female and male ENFPs. Stereotypically "NF-ish" behaviors are often generalized as "feminine" behavior (no idea why), and people tend to correlate the silly categorization of traditional "masculine" and "feminine" traits with sexual orientation. It's really quite stupid.
Agreed. I can't wait to find a women who doesn't hold me to some silly and pathetic standard of masculinity.
 
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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
This is all so frustrating because the same person called me out for being a thief in the same breath. It's hard enough dealing with one lie, but two in one sentence?:sad: It has not been a good morning.
 

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This is all so frustrating because the same person called me out for being a thief in the same breath. It's hard enough dealing with one lie, but two in one sentence?:sad: It has not been a good morning.
Yeah... that's rough. I suggest a complete analysis of his systems. Find his weak point, likely his father, and strike quickly and decisively.
 

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I knew an INFP guy when I was in school, he was quite artistic and not very masculine, and most of his friends were girls. I remember people openly joking about the closet thing with him, but he asserted he was straight. At one point he got a girlfriend and I remember how some people acted really surprised that he wasn't gay. He actually gotten so involved with his girlfriend that he disappeared from our circle for a while. After this there wasn't a question raised. But yeah all of us a prone to stereotypes - as long as they aren't judging you negatively though based on whatever stereotype they think you fit, it doesn't really matter.
 

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Yeah... that's rough. I suggest a complete analysis of his systems. Find his weak point, likely his father, and strike quickly and decisively.
Or I dunno, kick his ass with a bottle in one hand, porn mag in another, and cigar in your mouth. Then do a John Wayne drawl and ask in most profane manner whether he prefers you to be this way.
 

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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
I knew an INFP guy when I was in school, he was quite artistic and not very masculine, and most of his friends were girls. I remember people openly joking about the closet thing with him, but he asserted he was straight. At one point he got a girlfriend and I remember how some people acted really surprised that he wasn't gay. He actually gotten so involved with his girlfriend that he disappeared from our circle for a while. After this there wasn't a question raised. But yeah all of us a prone to stereotypes - as long as they aren't judging you negatively though based on whatever stereotype they think of you it doesn't really matter.
I don't really have the means to prove it atm, there is nobody down here at my college over the summer.
 

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I don't really have the means to prove it atm, there is nobody down here at my college over the summer.
What about girls who aren't students in your college? There must be some girls working/living in your area that are around your age bracket, and it is fine if they are like 2-4 years older.
 

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Discussion Starter · #16 ·
What about girls who aren't students in your college? There must be some girls working/living in your area that are around your age bracket, and it is fine if they are like 2-4 years older.
Ga southern is weird like that, the real town of statesboro hates the university kids, so it'd be hard to even meet the local girls.
 

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I thought you were referring to an enfp quirk that someone else sees as a disorder or perceives something being 'wrong' with you.
My ESFJ sister decided to attack me last night, coming at me with things like..
"We'll (my brother sister and I) be sitting in a room and everything is fine and then you just say something so weird"
"Stop being so weird"
"Go get help, you NEED it"
My brother is an ENTJ if that helps.

I more or less told her to eat me (after trying to explain why I do some things I do, even if the explanation was just "Thats how I am" or "Thats what I enjoy")

She wasn't at all open to new points of view..

Anyway, I posted this because it reminded me of her deciding I need 'help' to realize how 'odd and dysfunctional' I really am, or some such.
 
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My significant other is an INFP, not an ENFP, but he's very "girly" and probably mistaken for being gay a lot too... at least, online, he's certainly been mistaken for being girl often enough! So much gender confusion has revolved around this guy!:tongue:

One time somebody asked him for advice on which shoes they should buy... their reasoning was that apparently gay guys are good with fashion. XDDD But he is certainly 100% straight!

...Hm, I spent this whole post talking about somebody else's experiences in this, not my own. o.o Well, before we got together, he tried to get me to be another girl's girlfriend, even though he knew I was straight. But I don't think that counts. :tongue:
 

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Discussion Starter · #19 ·
I hate stereotyping in general, but it's unavoidable in all cases, some people have to assume some things. I understand that's what happens, but I still don't like it. People should learn a bit about someone before they make such a huge assumption about someone.
 
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I agree that it is a very human and unavoidable thing to make assumptions and judgments, but people who base their relations with someone they don't really know on those judgments and who are unwilling to accept something that contradicts those judgments are the ones who piss me off...
 
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