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Discussion Starter #1
I'm at my parents house over my winter break, and I was going through some of my old stuff... Well I came across some pictures of the first person I loved, and... well, I just felt everything again. Part of it could be that he's now dating the person I was best friends with in high school (who is an awful person to her very core), and part of it could be that the only other boyfriend I've had since him was an emotionally abusive and highly unstable alcoholic. I'm just wondering what you guys think about this... Do you think you ever really stop loving someone if you truly loved them? Or does that love just take a different form?

Also, sorry I got a little ranty about my own personal situation. Just trying to explain how I came to thinking about this.
 

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no I can't say that I have either...I feel as though the reason is that I don't give my love away very easily to others. I don't mean that I don't care about them, but its just two different things to me. So when I do actually love somebody I love them whole heartedly and I don't feel like thats a kind of bond that can easily be broken:tongue:
 

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Well, truth is that you will never ever ever forget the first person that you were in love with.
And if it was true love, oh well, that person is gonna be inside your heart till death do you apart.
The fire of true love burns the brightest, but the brightest flame also leaves the deepest scars.

but hopefully you're all smiles now
 

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Discussion Starter #8
I cant stop loving my ex. We made a pact that we'd love eachother forever (and ever n ever..) and even if she broke it ...meh...what can i say? I'm a man of my word
Yep, that's the same with me and this person. We always said that no matter what happened we'd still love each other.
 

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Once we (generalised we) love it's hard to stop feeling that way, it can change but it never really goes. People have continued loving others who have done horrible, gruesome things, things that have others believing that person must be as sick as the one they love for still loving them, but it's not exactly something you can turn on and off. You can mask it, attempt to hide it, smother it until you think it's dwindled out, but stopping it? No.

I half-joke that I fall in love with everyone I meet, perhaps not the romantic everlasting love others are describing, but still love. I give them a little piece of myself and it's hard for me to stop loving them. Even when they've moved on, fallen out of touch, or say things that cut me to the core I still love them. All the hurt and cursing in the world can't turn back time and allow me to simply not give them a piece of my heart, even if I could I wouldn't know how. It does change, it stops hurting and they become a fond memory, a shadow of someone I once knew that reminds me of how people who flitter into our lives can change us for the better. Well, sometimes for the worst, but something positive can still be gained from it.


What was the question again?

Oh. Actually I think the feelings can change depending on the relationship and who comes into your life after them, but it can be complex, messy and time consuming depending on how deep you plunged.
 

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Discussion Starter #12
I think that once I love someone, that is, once I get to the point of being that emotionally invested in the person, I really never stop caring for them no matter what happens... but I WILL blow their brains out if they turn into a zombie (even though I'd feel bad about it.)
Hahaha love it!
 

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Discussion Starter #13
Once we (generalised we) love it's hard to stop feeling that way, it can change but it never really goes. People have continued loving others who have done horrible, gruesome things, things that have others believing that person must be as sick as the one they love for still loving them, but it's not exactly something you can turn on and off. You can mask it, attempt to hide it, smother it until you think it's dwindled out, but stopping it? No.

I half-joke that I fall in love with everyone I meet, perhaps not the romantic everlasting love others are describing, but still love. I give them a little piece of myself and it's hard for me to stop loving them. Even when they've moved on, fallen out of touch, or say things that cut me to the core I still love them. All the hurt and cursing in the world can't turn back time and allow me to simply not give them a piece of my heart, even if I could I wouldn't know how. It does change, it stops hurting and they become a fond memory, a shadow of someone I once knew that reminds me of how people who flitter into our lives can change us for the better. Well, sometimes for the worst, but something positive can still be gained from it.


What was the question again?

Oh. Actually I think the feelings can change depending on the relationship and who comes into your life after them, but it can be complex, messy and time consuming depending on how deep you plunged.
Beautifully said. I can definitely relate.
 

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I think that once I love someone, that is, once I get to the point of being that emotionally invested in the person, I really never stop caring for them no matter what happens... but I WILL blow their brains out if they turn into a zombie (even though I'd feel bad about it.)
LOL!! u'd definitely survive the zombie apocalypse :laughing:
 

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My former lover is an emotional wreck and an excellent liar, or at the very least as good at manipulating others as I am. My life is devoted to another whom I love much more today, though despite the hardship the breakup brought along, I have no hard feelings for my ex, there's still a kind of love. I won't think twice about protecting myself and my love though, should my ex ever snap for whatever reason.

I don't think I ever stopped loving anyone I loved for real.
 
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for me i can stop loving somebody once they've changed. cuz then guy i was in love with just doesnt exist anymore and i move on.
 

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No, I do not believe that you ever stop loving someone, but the nature of your love for them is going to morph throughout your lifetime. In loving someone you give them a piece of yourself, and if the feeling is mutual, then you have a piece of them. There is always going to be a connection unless you consciously do something to severe it. Even then there is likely to be an echo of that connection. So there will always be some sort of emotional attachment. But, it is very dependent upon how you loved the person and how they loved you as to how strong that connection is and how it affects you in memory.

My own personal example is that I can think of my ex-husband (you have no idea how fantastic it is to write it as such) with only the most distant echo of the feelings I once thought I had for him. Little impact to me anymore. However, when I think about several friends I had at the beginning of this year whom I am no longer in contact with, it's much more akin to being punched in the gut by all the conflicting emotions I have involving them - one neat and dense fist of emotion. I loved them more in so many ways, despite it not being romantic love, so I can only imagine what it is to be punched like that by a truly romantic love, though I do think I'm starting to get a pretty good idea of what that feels like.

And it's because of the above things that I truly do believe what my signature says - there really aren't enough names for love as there are so many more ways to experience it than what we can name or number.
 

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I don't think it ever goes away, the best you can hope for is that you somehow manage to keep it punching you in the gut more over time.
I've never really fallen in love in the romantic sense but I never lose that sense of caring for people and people I have lost in different ways I can still be as deeply affected by as I ever was if the right thing comes up to trigger it.
 

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It's sort of like a dying fire, the embers are still there but there's no flame. But if said person feels like coming over and kicking the shit out of it, it'll get going again.
 
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