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My INTP fiance is endlessly fascinated with the way I get embarrassed for other people. Whether it's in life situations or while we're watching a film, if someone does something socially out-of-line or doesn't see that they're offending someone else, I begin to slink under my sweater and just feel all of the embarrassment for them. Sometimes I even have to just get up and leave, because the emotion is so overwhelming. My fiance just watches me leave in bemused confusion, and then comes after me, laughing, "Where'd ya go? Come back!"

My thought is that this is just me Fe-ing all over the place.

What about you guys? Do you get embarrassed for others?
 

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Yes :blushed:

When I was a little kid I could not stand television shows like mr Bean or other shows where everything just went wrong in a very socially awkward way.
Same here. As much as I love The Office, I have a hard time watching Michael Scott for the same reason. I can just feel the discomfort of the room.

In real life, it seems to move me to positive action. Even in social situations where I usually wouldn't put myself out there, I'll be the forward and social one if it means I can avert someone else's embarrassment or discomfort. It means I look more extroverted at parties than I actually am, but putting out fires is my niche.
 

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The tension is immediate and fierce. It happens to me all the time, especially if they don't know how they're affecting others.

I'm literally mortified with them.
 

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Absolutely. though, I've come to the point where I try to reason and help them avoid being embarrassed all together. Help them to feel more comfortable in any way I can.
It's so an empathetic Fe thing. That's why they call us the protectors ;)
 

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Im not aloneeee!! XDD When I was a kid I didn't want to watch other kids sing cause I felt like they are making fools out of themselves.. and I cant really watch gag videos now XD
 

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My INTP fiance is endlessly fascinated with the way I get embarrassed for other people. Whether it's in life situations or while we're watching a film, if someone does something socially out-of-line or doesn't see that they're offending someone else, I begin to slink under my sweater and just feel all of the embarrassment for them. Sometimes I even have to just get up and leave, because the emotion is so overwhelming. My fiance just watches me leave in bemused confusion, and then comes after me, laughing, "Where'd ya go? Come back!"

My thought is that this is just me Fe-ing all over the place.

What about you guys? Do you get embarrassed for others?
Yes, all the time, if it's a tv show or movie I have seen and I know an embarrassing scene is coming up I will purposely turn the channel so I don't have to re live it and feel the uncomfortableness. But how you described it ( slinking under your sweater and your fiance chasing you down) may be the cutest thing I have ever heard.
 

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Happens to me all the time. My ISTP friend sends me cringe videos and I can't watch them at all because I start feeling embarrassed when they do something socially awkward. x.x

I've also found out that I panic when others are panicking, which tells you what type of person I am when I'm in a stressful situation with other people freaking out. x.x
 
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I'm not an INFJ, but enneagram 6w5. I get the second hand embarrassment too.

It's hard sometimes to stay in social situations because of this. One of the most hardest feelings of embarrassment recently was when I was watching 'A Clockwork Orange' and witnessed Alex being spat into his face and him still smiling. As well as him fucking up things. Or seeing others being unknowingly awkward in a big group... It doesn't freak me out, it just is uncomfortable. Makes me want to slip out of my skin!
 
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All the freaking time. Not only with people, sometimes if I am watching something very umcomfortable it gets very hard to keep watching it, I change the channel. Even if I am alone, it feel awkward.
When it comes to people, I just leave the room.
 

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This type of thing doesn't really bother me when I watch it in shows. I'm not sure why. Maybe because I know it's not real? Usually shows feel real to me too so I'm not sure that's the reason. Maybe it doesn't FEEL real to me for some reason? Like The Office doesn't make me cringe. If something like that happened in person though, it would make me cringe. My dad is kind of like Michael's character without many of the redeeming qualities he has.
 
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I don't usually feel the embarassment when watching shows either, but the more well-acquainted I am with a person in real life, the more I will feel embarassment when they do something socially awkward or are oblivious to it. It makes me very physically and mentally uncomfortable and if they notice, they usually can't understand why I even care so much.
 

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Yes! This happens to me a lot. I can't stand to watch certain tv shows or movies because I'll feel the embarrassment so strongly. I think it's magnified in situations when the person doesn't realize they're being embarrassing, and like I experience it all. There have been a few times that I left a room because I didn't want to watch a scene.

It's interesting you bring this up because I had a conversation with an INTP friend a few years back about this. She experiences it too, actually (though me probably more often). We both used an example from the tv show The Office, where Michael promises high school students scholarships to college or something like that, and he has to tell them he can't do it and it's SO AGONIZING.
 

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I thought I was just weird...every time I watch someone sing outside of anyone's comfort zone, I get goosebumps and feel extremely uncomfortable even though it's not ME singing! :confused:
 

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Quite possibly the worst movie I've seen in my life was Meet The Parents. My friends enjoyed it. I spent most of it mortified under my seat.
 

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I get really uncomfortable in those situations, too. My general response is to smooth it over by taking the embarrassment off of them. Sometimes I do something awkward myself so I am the one people should be embarrassed of; I'm used to dealing with those situations. Having been the morally upright and honest kid that grew up in the slums around the druggies and gangbangers I would be the one committing a faux pas all the time (by *their* cultural standards). Like, refusing someone's weed is a huge insult in many circles. As such, I am fine being the laughingstock as long as everyone else is comfortable. I also tend to be adept at changing the subject, covering it up if only a couple people noticed, and letting it go if the group I am in isn't embarrassed about it even when it is behavior most groups would find embarrassing.

I find shows based around cringe or gag reel humor uninteresting but not uncomfortable. I have a high tolerance for that sort of shenanigans. One of my best friends used to spend a great deal of time with other friends of his kicking each other in the testicles to "build toughness". Idiots. I will be the one serious guy who halfheartedly laughs at the "funniest" gag jokes of the bunch and is stone faced the rest of the time in any given group.

TL;DR I get the discomfort too, and I react to it with action designed to defuse the situation. I take charge of the situation and deal with the whole group in some way instead of leaving it.
 

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I don't feel it so much while watching shows, unless it's handled in a way that isn't meant to be humorous. Maybe it feels more real or relatable that way?

When I'm in an actual social situation and something embarrassing happens to another person though, I go into a weird crisis-aversion mode and instinctively try to diffuse any embarrassment or divert attention away from the incident, depending on how big said incident is.

As for my own embarrassment, I sometimes find myself thinking back to an embarrassing moment or conversation and have the sudden urge to do a small impulsive thing, like slap the chair I'm sitting in, make a weird face to myself, or a sudden exclamation if I'm in the room with another person (and deal with their confused reaction). It's really strange but I guess I get so uncomfortable thinking about it to the point that I feel the urge to express it somehow.

Embarrassment is one of the more uncomfortable feelings I experience, whether it's for myself or others. Nice to know I'm not alone in this. :)
 
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