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This thread helped me so much. I'm getting bored with a relationship (after only a month! A month!!!) and now I understand it's a combination of my hatred of routine and my fear of commitment. Now to fix it and keep reminding myself routine and commitment mean stability, and I need to find out that they're not as bad and boring as they sound.
Thanks guys!
 

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Something I hear from pretty much every ESFP I've ever known is, basically the equivalent of "I need someone to love me!" but they don't have much love for themselves.

the reason why I mention Peter Sellers, is because if you look him up, he was a very funny comedic actor who played an array of roles, but something he always stated was that he felt he had no identity beyond the roles he played, and that was probably a result of his fears and insecurities. That sounds very ESFP to me. I find ESFPs tend to get lost in the people they care a lot about, and who are the dearest to them. They can be chameleonlike and, sometimes lose their sense of identity in getting caught up in trying to please or make an impression on others. That's probably Se-Te looping. I find ESFPs often don't really explore their introvert side. Fi is so important. You guys are capable of having so much insight into what you want, and what you like, and what you value, but I find ESFPs often spin their wheels between Se and Te and this whole wanting to get into how everyone else thinks mentality.
Wow you're good.

Yeah I always say I feel like I have no identity, my identity is basically just my environment, and whoever is around me at the time. I have been working on developing my own interests and talents but it is very hard, because that itself is an introverted activity and it takes a lot of energy. It is hard because what I am really interested in is people. So my interests mimic those of the people around me. And when I have new people around me all the time I can't keep up. So I end up with a surface level knowledge of a bunch of different mainstream topics. Which I think is actually not bad, though I should probably commit to something. And here we are coming full circle again haha.
 

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I don't have this problem. I'm currently in a relationship with someone and we've been having sex together for about a year now and I'm still interested.
 

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I would never have sex with anyone I was not interested in. that would not make sense to me. I only sex with people that have appearance and personality that excites me emotionally and I don't want to lose
 
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