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I think i have fallen in love with this 15 year old Malaysian girl(note i'm 18 going to 19 this sept. 26 and i'm from the Philippines) Who've caught my attention via intellectual argument(and well she introduce me to this site which i like the most)

And well i've been attracted to her ever since... Which i find natural because i'm someone who easily falls in love(regardless the time i'm in love when i say i'm in love by the way).. Actually i'm gonna ask this in Facebook yet i know people there wouldn't understand cause they aren't capable of doing so...

So... I'm gonna ask you guys... Is it foolish to fall in love online? Or in the cyber world? Of course if she falls in love with me then i'm gonna do my best in my job(by the way i'm a 3rd year Education Major in English Student) to come up with enough money to go to her and be with her...

I know this sounds stupid.. But please any comment and truthful opinion is well accepted(so guys disregard sugarcoating and just spit out facts.. i'm ready of deadly comments and opinions) XD

1170679_700084210005380_1373891543_n.jpg

By the way this is my ugly self looks like ^^ *just being truthful towards you and myself also, ^^
 

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When I was sixteen, I was in a long-distance relationship with someone five years older for about nine months. It was great while it lasted and we broke it off for a variety of reasons, but I think that if you can endure not being in the same physical space with her then it will be fine.

...when it comes to the online aspect at least. If she's Muslim then there might be some issues there; if/when you marry her you must convert to Islam, or she could un-become (what's the proper word) a Muslim. Seeing as Catholicism is a strong aspect of the Philippines identity (tell me if I'm wrong), both options seem like they will require great sacrifice. (Side fact: If you were the Muslim and she was a Christian/Jew you two would be able to marry, no problem by Muslim religious law. Family opinion would still remain an issue.)

A more immediate concern would be that Muslim religious law forbids physical contact between unrelated people of different genders, among other things. So compared to communities of other religions, parents might have more conservative attitudes towards relationships. This is purely anecdotal, but I recall reading stories of brothers in Malaysia beating up boys who spend time alone with their sisters in an isolated place, to "protect" their sisters.

Your most immediate concern would be her age. She's 15 and you're 19. IF her family finds out that you two are dating they'll more than likely freak out and think that you're a predator, and block you from contacting her. IF. So just don't get caught. It's not that hard, just don't do anything weird on camera. She can also say that you're common interest friends or something, though that works to varying degrees. It worked for me because I like to play online games so it's sort of natural that I would make friends on the Internet.

By the way, isn't she going to see this post?
 

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Discussion Starter #3
When I was sixteen, I was in a long-distance relationship with someone five years older for about nine months. It was great while it lasted and we broke it off for a variety of reasons, but I think that if you can endure not being in the same physical space with her then it will be fine.

...when it comes to the online aspect at least. If she's Muslim then there might be some issues there; if/when you marry her you must convert to Islam, or she could un-become (what's the proper word) a Muslim. Seeing as Catholicism is a strong aspect of the Philippines identity (tell me if I'm wrong), both options seem like they will require great sacrifice. (Side fact: If you were the Muslim and she was a Christian/Jew you two would be able to marry, no problem by Muslim religious law. Family opinion would still remain an issue.)

A more immediate concern would be that Muslim religious law forbids physical contact between unrelated people of different genders, among other things. So compared to communities of other religions, parents might have more conservative attitudes towards relationships. This is purely anecdotal, but I recall reading stories of brothers in Malaysia beating up boys who spend time alone with their sisters in an isolated place, to "protect" their sisters.

Your most immediate concern would be her age. She's 15 and you're 19. IF her family finds out that you two are dating they'll more than likely freak out and think that you're a predator, and block you from contacting her. IF. So just don't get caught. It's not that hard, just don't do anything weird on camera. She can also say that you're common interest friends or something, though that works to varying degrees. It worked for me because I like to play online games so it's sort of natural that I would make friends on the Internet.

By the way, isn't she going to see this post?
First of all thanks.. I appreciated your effort to somehow answer that weird question. ^^

Second religion isn't any prob with me if i'll left my religion for her i'll do it without hesitation whatsoever. I have this saying that "If religion will only separate you from your love ones then discard that religion, We all know that religions center goal is to unit us all not separate us" So i'll un-become my Christianity if i need too..

Third i'll be willing to get beaten if that means i can prove my love for her...

Lastly i don't think age does matter, and even so i can wait years for that gap to be filled...

Ps. I want her to know... ^^
 

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Falling in love while in your teen years is probably the most ridiculous part. I never had the impression that teenagers could truly be "in love" and it's more of a puppylove sort of thing. There's a lot of maturing you guys still have to go through at that age and you never know, but you may be totally different people in three years than what you are as so much change happens during the teen years and early 20s. Personalities tend to stabilize in mid 20s and change less after that point, so real love is more possible then. My 15-year-old self was totally different from my 18-year-old self... and I feel like me in my early 20s is way more mature than at 18.

Internet love isn't too ridiculous to me... a lot of people use it to connect to others these days and is more and more common all the time. There's a lot more obstacles to overcome with it compared to knowing them in person, though.

A friend of mine lives in Malaysia so I know a bit about it. The girl you like may not be Muslim. Do you know for sure if she is or not? Muslims are the majority but there's a good sized non-Muslim Indian and Chinese population there as well. Be aware that Malaysia is a rather racist country politically/culturally and while it varies from individual to individual and family to family, it is something to think about.
 

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Discussion Starter #5
Falling in love while in your teen years is probably the most ridiculous part. I never had the impression that teenagers could truly be "in love" and it's more of a puppylove sort of thing. There's a lot of maturing you guys still have to go through at that age and you never know, but you may be totally different people in three years than what you are as so much change happens during the teen years and early 20s. Personalities tend to stabilize in mid 20s and change less after that point, so real love is more possible then. My 15-year-old self was totally different from my 18-year-old self... and I feel like me in my early 20s is way more mature than at 18.

Internet love isn't too ridiculous to me... a lot of people use it to connect to others these days and is more and more common all the time. There's a lot more obstacles to overcome with it compared to knowing them in person, though.

A friend of mine lives in Malaysia so I know a bit about it. The girl you like may not be Muslim. Do you know for sure if she is or not? Muslims are the majority but there's a good sized non-Muslim Indian and Chinese population there as well. Be aware that Malaysia is a rather racist country politically/culturally and while it varies from individual to individual and family to family, it is something to think about.
Not matured you say?

At the age of ten i'm in a company which i work at for up until last year, The salary was too good that i manage to cover up my tuition bill my sis tuition bill, monthly water and electricity bill, plus a bank savings of my own. At the age of 16 i was able to graduate from high school and started going into college level, At the college life I've left my work life to focus in my studies.

I don't know what kind of maturity you people are looking for but yeah i know i'm mature enough to know what i'm doing.

Second calling someone/something or even some groups, Bias is bias in itself. ^^

Thanks for your input kind sir i appreciated your opinion ^^
 

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I wouldn't recommend it.

I fell in love online and moved to another country... I knew them online for many years online before I moved there (5 - 8 years). That being said, I met them IRL at the same time I moved there.

In 98 % of cases, it doesn't have a good outcome. For me, it did.

Know who you're going to be with. You need years to figure that out.
 

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Not matured you say?

At the age of ten i'm in a company which i work at for up until last year, The salary was too good that i manage to cover up my tuition bill my sis tuition bill, monthly water and electricity bill, plus a bank savings of my own. At the age of 16 i was able to graduate from high school and started going into college level, At the college life I've left my work life to focus in my studies.

I don't know what kind of maturity you people are looking for but yeah i know i'm mature enough to know what i'm doing.

Second calling someone/something or even some groups, Bias is bias in itself. ^^

Thanks for your input kind sir i appreciated your opinion ^^
Achievements =/= maturity

Maturity is an attitude and emotional thing, as well as wisdom. Being willing to get beat up ((and thus having a poor relationship with the males of her family)) just to spend time with her isn't wise. Same goes for blindly leaving a religion and jumping into a completely different one without knowing what it curtails.
 

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Discussion Starter #8
Achievements =/= maturity

Maturity is an attitude and emotional thing, as well as wisdom. Being willing to get beat up ((and thus having a poor relationship with the males of her family)) just to spend time with her isn't wise. Same goes for blindly leaving a religion and jumping into a completely different one without knowing what it curtails.
As i said i'm matured enough to do things that others won't do. There is a huge difference between someone who is under the standard and someone who willing to overshadow it for purposes.

The religion isn't going to be something that matters because i'm not really someone who believes at its motive first and foremost. Why? Tell me, What is religion sole purpose? Isn't it to unite people no matter what? XD so if religion is something that will separate me from someone i'll cherish then it loses its purpose already, Then i'll leave it already.

2nd i only will be willing to get beaten if i needed to be, just to prove my value for their daughter. If i don't need to do so, I WON'T.

And if you don't know this yet. Guys easily gets along together, If i capture their week points then i have the ticket towards their trust. And everything else follows.

Don't belittle a man with his age. I know how to use tactics and intellectual maneuvers if i have to. ^^

I use my head more than i use my heart after all god put it in my head for it to work faster than my heart does.

But then again thanks for the input, I appreciated the effort and opinion. ^^
 

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I've had experiences with this as well. I don't think it's ridiculous as long something's "actually" there...

Though, as Word Dispenser said, it doesn't work out for most people.

It really just depends on the situation I suppose.
 

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I've had experiences with this as well. I don't think it's ridiculous as long something's "actually" there...

Though, as Word Dispenser said, it doesn't work out for most people.

It really just depends on the situation I suppose.
Not situations but people and their actions.. It defends in that factors that make something impossible to another person possible to you.
 

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I wouldn't recommend it.

I fell in love online and moved to another country... I knew them online for many years online before I moved there (5 - 8 years). That being said, I met them IRL at the same time I moved there.

In 98 % of cases, it doesn't have a good outcome. For me, it did.

Know who you're going to be with. You need years to figure that out.
Sad to hear that kind sir.. But i'll gamble my cards, take the risk.. Cause if you ask me if she's worth it i'll just look up in the sun/moon and say HELL YEAH!

XD
 

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Not situations but people and their actions.. It defends in that factors that make something impossible to another person possible to you.
Yeah, of course, that's a given.

I don't know how it is, so it's really up to you whether or not you wanna go for it.

Be careful though.
 

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Yeah, of course, that's a given.

I don't know how it is, so it's really up to you whether or not you wanna go for it.

Be careful though.

Noted.. Thanks.. although i'm quiet dense i still need luck..

I have nothing to lose anyway so why not?

And i'm quiet ugly compare to all of you guys so yeah i assume you really don't know the feeling. ^^
 

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I just wish it crosses her mind that i'm not the same as those players she knows.. I'm different.. I'm loyal and i know to love...
 

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Sad to hear that kind sir.. But i'll gamble my cards, take the risk.. Cause if you ask me if she's worth it i'll just look up in the sun/moon and say HELL YEAH!

XD
Yes, that's fine. Just, don't rush into it. You're not in a hurry. Take some time to get to know her intellectually. What you're feeling now is premature.

Give it a few years, be friends until then. If you're dedicated, you'll do that, for the both of you.

The worst is meeting someone and discovering that there is a huge dichotomy between who they portray themselves to be, and who they actually are. This is actually not something they can control, even if they do their best to be genuine.
 

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It sounds to me like you've already made up your mind. You even come across as needing to prove yourself. That isn't a way to fall in love, online or not.

I do agree that it's best to wait until both parties are around 20 before considering a serious relationship. My husband & I first met when I was 13, then we spent a bit of time hanging out when I was 16, but we didn't really connect until I was 19. It's okay to decide to commit to each other while you're young, but there are advantages to waiting. We both agree that we had growing up to do before getting together.

I think a big key here is... have you talked with her about all this? Be sure that you get her side & respect it. You have time.

More to the point of the original question: for a time, I genuinely thought that I was going to end up marrying a guy friend I knew online. Well, we'd known each other online for about three years, then we met in person & I was hooked. I spent the next three years pretty crazy about him. Yes, these times in fact overlap with what I said earlier about my husband... when the man I was to marry came back into my life, I had to make a choice between what I was beginning to feel with him & what I had been feeling for years about the guy I knew online... & I took the time to deliberately analyze objectively what I knew about both of them, & knew what the right choice was. It wasn't about which one lived less than a thousand miles away, but which one as a man was right for me. (In fact, a few months after I began courting the man I married, I got a chance to spend more time in person with the online friend. & I can confirm for you that I was right that he'd changed over the years. In any friendship, near or far, there is always that risk of growing into different people & thereby growing apart. There has to be a choice to stay with a friendship, or let it go.)
 

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Yes, that's fine. Just, don't rush into it. You're not in a hurry. Take some time to get to know her intellectually. What you're feeling now is premature.

Give it a few years, be friends until then. If you're dedicated, you'll do that, for the both of you.

The worst is meeting someone and discovering that there is a huge dichotomy between who they portray themselves to be, and who they actually are. This is actually not something they can control, even if they do their best to be genuine.
Yes, i'll take note of that. I don't really want to push her in loving me back cause it might seems that she only love me out of pity.

Plus the excitement and anticipation is really killing me if you ask me. XD
 
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