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Do you view the world & yourself through the eyes of others?

1454 Views 18 Replies 14 Participants Last post by  DaEvil1
I – like most of you I believe – have a strong sensitivity to the opinions and feelings others hold, but I'm especially sensitive to the ones I feel they hold about me.

As a result, I strive, occasionally to my disadvantage, to maintain a positive image in the eyes of others - often viewing myself through their eyes. Though I’ve learned to recognize when I do this and thus have some degree of control over it, I still can't help this tendency. Most often it works as something positive. However, sometimes it is also a source of great irritation; there are times when I just want to see the world through my eyes not theirs. But, alas, I must also see through the eyes of others'.

Do any of you also find you do this often?
If so, how do you feel about it?
Have you learned to recognize it?
Have you learned anything from it?

I’m curious to see if this is common among INFPs.

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Totally have this tendency. And mostly to my detriment I'm sorry to say. The tendency ofter causes me do things I don't want to and gets me stuck in situations I should not be in. It also causes me to to have trouble getting out of relationships that I shouldnt be in, because no matter how much I may feel I need out I still don't want to hurt the other person and i don't want them to have a slighted view of me.:frustrating:
You speak of many struggles I've been through and sometimes still go through. Though this can be a frustrating tendency, it's nice to know I'm not alone in it. Thanks for your eloquent and open response :happy:
I like to believe I am empathetic to others, but I am not persuaded that I am actually seeing the world as they see it. Over time I've learned there can be a great disparity between how I view myself and how others view me. So how can I presume to know how they are seeing the world?
I agree with you. I don't mean literally; I cannot 'know' how another views either myself or the world. However, this does not prevent the tendency to try and relate, understand, and intuit another’s feelings and viewpoint, however flawed such an analysis truly may be. But you raise an important point on this topic - no one can truly understand us, only we can do that ourselves. Thanks for bringing this up, as it should not be ignored when talking about empathy or understanding another! :happy:
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