Personality Cafe banner

1 - 15 of 15 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,564 Posts
Nah. I'm mostly concerned with my own competence and emotional state.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Goetterdaemmerung

·
Banned
Joined
·
745 Posts
No. What would be the point of that? I can get frustrated by things that are out of my control. The remedy for that is to get busy working on something else that I can actually accomplish.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,208 Posts
If I recognize and accept that it's true that there's nothing I can see to do about a particular problem in this moment then it won't bother me very much. I still recognize problems as problems but if it's truly out of my hands then it's truly out of my hands.

Maybe in the next moment I'll see that there is something I can do and then I'll do something.
 

·
Registered
INTP 9w1-5w4-2w3 sp/so
Joined
·
2,601 Posts
I worry about quite a few things that are out of my control. World events, the feelings of others, things that are inevitable. The list goes on and on. Thinking about it in hindsight, I know it may be silly to worry a lot especially when things turn out okay. I have trouble controlling it in the moment. I may be able to push the feelings back but if it is something that keeps on nagging at me, I can't hide them forever. I am able to hide it but it is always there. I am a person that worries a lot and it's a terrible feeling to know that you can't stop something from happening. I manage to take my mind off of things in the moment but the thoughts still bubble beneath the surface.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Goetterdaemmerung

·
Banned
Joined
·
11,471 Posts
Discussion Starter #6
I worry about quite a few things that are out of my control. World events, the feelings of others, things that are inevitable. The list goes on and on. Thinking about it in hindsight, I know it may be silly to worry a lot especially when things turn out okay. I have trouble controlling it in the moment. I may be able to push the feelings back but if it is something that keeps on nagging at me, I can't hide them forever. I am able to hide it but it is always there. I am a person that worries a lot and it's a terrible feeling to know that you can't stop something from happening. I manage to take my mind off of things in the moment but the thoughts still bubble beneath the surface.
Gladdened by your answer.


I was starting to feel all alone! :frustrating:
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
10,454 Posts
I don't believe I'm responsible for everyone and everything that goes on in the world (though I play a part) so I don't worry about those types of things. I try to focus on the things I am responsible for and where I can make a difference. Because that is empowering rather than discouraging. I would feel too weighted down in the other case.

However, I'm sure there are certain things that are out of my control that I do tend to worry about (initially). We all get tempted to sometimes. But then I just wind up talking myself down from it (or having someone help me do that) and trusting that everything happens for a reason (as cliche as that is). I used to not even believe that and I saw it as a cop out. Now I just trust. I try not to take life so seriously because I see this life as a learning experience. It is also extremely temporary.

If there's too much worries that just creates stress which builds up. There needs to be something positive to balance it all out otherwise it prevents me from functioning or better yet, thriving! And I would like to thrive rather than just survive so I can live up to my potential and help others in the process too. Within reason of course. I don't expect to feel 100% strong all the time. I have my moments! And there's nothing wrong with acknowledging those so you can process it and work through those feelings.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Goetterdaemmerung

·
Registered
Joined
·
7,995 Posts
I'm talking to my husband about your question, Geotter (can't get used to new name yet). He immediately said, "Absolutely. Trump is really bothering me. What if people are stupid enough to re-elect him in 2020."

You know, I don't know if it "hits" me all the time. Most of the time I just wish I were doing more to help out people in distress. I think a lot about this, because there are people who are DOING things to help, and I don't know why I feel barriers like lack of money or time. I deeply want to be one of them. I think I must be one day-- it just seems too comforting and inspiring for me to not DO at some point.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Goetterdaemmerung

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,083 Posts
I'd say yes. It doesn't show up as conscious worry most of the time though, but a feeling of annoyance about certain topics. Like, I don't want to think about it because it will make me worry. There are a lot of such topics, so yes I am a step away from general anxiety.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
745 Posts
Okay on second thought, yes, I do worry about things that are outside of my control. I am currently worried about my ex-bf who I believe has borderline personality disorder. I think about the pain he probably lives with on a daily basis. I think about our past interactions and how I would have handled things differently now that I have a better idea of what it is that ails him. I think about the positive support system I had as a kid with my mother and how he didn't have that with his parents and was left to fend for himself at home alone at six years old and how his mom fed him with a dropper when he was a baby and didn't hold him close, leaving him to feel insecure, emotionally unstable, and deathly afraid of abandonment.

We are estranged now. I can't do anything about this. I can't fix it and I know if we were to get back together (even as friends) it may lead to disaster, and I'm afraid to try.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,089 Posts
I think it's important to specify whether or not these events that are out of your control are also events that personally affect you. Consider a giant asteroid heading for earth or being born into an oppressive culture.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
486 Posts
Absolutely! I feel "stuck" often because I feel like I can't effect my surroundings as much as I'd like.

I'll think about homeless people I've met on the street years ago. I'll worry about where they are now and I'll wonder if they have anyone to care for them. The world can seem so cruel and it can be distressing. It makes life in general seems bleak a lot of the time honestly. I try to stay informed about social issues even when the people around me seem less interested in what I'm saying. I can come across as an 'activist', or perhaps to some people I seem more like I'm standing on a soapbox. There's a lot of needless suffering in the world. I may not be able to change much but I can sure as hell worry myself into a depression thinking about it!
 
1 - 15 of 15 Posts
Top