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Discussion Starter #1
I know some Feeling men have a rough time in society. The sensitive modern man is preferred more in theory than reality. A lot of women express preferring those rock-like Thinking men (I guess when you water them, they sprout something resembling life?). Well, I thought I'd make an emotional men appreciation thread because...

I, for one, LOVE those heart on sleeve wearing, grand romantic gesture making, endearingly sentimental, passionately acting, integrity keeping, sensitively considerate, confidently stirring, subtle nuance of feeling grasping, genuinely empathizing, noble values defending, complexly layered with intelligence and feeling, valiantly tender, big-hearted, unstintingly affectionate, magnanimous, gently encouraging, warmth exuding, emotional kind of men.


Who is with me?!
:happy:
OrangeAppled beautifully words this opening post, showing appreciation for Emotional men in her Thread.

Are Emotional women appreciated? I mean to say, what OrangeAppled is saying, but applied to women.

Read her post again, except replace 'men' with 'women'...how does this feel?

Thank you OrangeAppled for allowing me to use your quote in my Thread; I could not have worded it better.

I sense men kind of run away from 'Emotional' women. I was surprised to read this, in OrangeAppled's Thread:

i prefer emotional women...i don't know of many men who chase after un-emotional women
So I would like to explore this topic further.......

How do men feel about Emotional women?

Where are these men, like WiscoExplorer, who prefer Emotional women?

What 'Type' of man would seek an Emotional women?
 

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Discussion Starter #2
SATC Episode: An American Girl in Paris - Part Deux

Carrie Bradshaw leaves The Russian:

I'm so sorry.
I thought I was clear all along about who I am.
Well...
Maybe it's time to be clear about who I am.
I am someone who is looking for love.
Real love. Ridiculous, inconvenient,
consuming can't live without each other love.
And I don't think...
that love is here in...
in this expensive suite and this lovely hotel in Paris.
It's not your fault. It's my fault.
I shouldn't have come here.
- Carrie. - Please, don't.
I'm fine.
Thank you.

[www.sexandthecityscripts.com]

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I recall this episode because it reminds me of sometimes feeling isolated, in relationships where my feelings are disregarded. This was the meaning of this example. The Russian, in New York seemed romantic enough, however his character became quite cold in Paris, and he disregarded Carrie's feelings. I feel this way sometimes; and sometimes say 'I'm Fine' when I'm really not. Just kind of disappointed. Sorry for the SATC example, but this episode came up in my mind today, because of the feelings in it. I am feeling kind of lonely in my heart, and disregarded. I'm not saying to watch SATC; I am just referring to a few Episodes I can relate to. Which causes me to question this topic. I see response to Emotional women is far different than response to Emotional men.
 

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Discussion Starter #3
Wedding Poem by Carrie Bradshaw

His hello was the end of her endings,
Her laugh was their first step down the aisle.
His hand would be hers to hold forever,
His forever was as simple as her smile.

An ocean couldn’t prevent it.
A New York minute wouldn’t let it pass.
Does the universe decide for us,
Which love will fade and which will last.

He said she was what was missing.
She said she instantly new.
She was a question to be answered.
And his answer was “I do.”

------------------------------------------------------------------

This has happened to me before. I'm no poetry writing, romantic dress wearing girl. However I am clearly Emotional sometimes. And what happened during this scene, for those that don't know, is that Carrie was reading her romantic poem at a wedding, and Mr. Big couldn't care less, he was on his cell phone during her recitation. It just reminded me of a lot of things I do, that get unappreciated. I've dated several Mr. Big types. I wonder what they see in me, and I in them. But sometimes I feel a drought of appreciation for my efforts. If a guy writes a poem, he is a Hero. If I write a poem, I'm 'Emotional', thus I do not write anymore. It is never appreciated................This is my point in posting this poem. Again, males, NOT telling you to watch SATC -- Chill out! hehehe
 

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Emotional women... :dry:

Must you get upset over every fucking thing I try and assume that I memorize every single goddamn thing you've ever even faintly subconsciously tried to imply to me?
 

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Emotional women... :dry:

Must you get upset over every fucking thing I try and assume that I memorize every single goddamn thing you've ever even faintly subconsciously tried to imply to me?
I don't know if that's the mark of an emotional woman, or a mentally unstable woman... be careful with your generalizations. Emotions can be very pure, and "emotional" does not necessarily mean "constantly sad or angry".
 

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Just as men there is a line between being emotional and being unstable and irrationally emotional. I appreciate emotional women sure as long as they are healthy with their emotions. I appreciate people regardless if they are emotional or unemotional though. I think there is much less of astigmatism against emotional women because, society in its "infinite" knowledge says women are emotional and men aren't and that is the way its suppose to be. I feel like a discussion about whether unemotional/cold women are appreciated would be interesting.

The friendship I have with emotional women and non-emotional is different for sure. I like all of them are people sure. One in particular is very emotional and she is sometimes difficult to deal with be she leans towards the unstable emotional category. Personally I wouldn't want to be with an overly emotional woman nor would I want to be with a cold towel for a woman either.
 

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Nope. Emotional people make decisions based off of said emotions, half the time it's sweet, the other half it's just irrational and irrationality is annoying as fuck.

Every guy I've dated has LOVED the fact that I wasn't some emotion-driven twat.
 

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I would think the people who really ARE unemotional wouldn't even desire a relationship in the first place. So, what we have here are three separate bowls of emotion porridge. Personally, I'd prefer the one that is "just right".

People on the highly emotional end are wonderful in theory, but in practice, not so much.
 

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I think that the word 'emotional' implies emotionality in excess. I really don't think a highly emotional person would be very desirable, but I'm not sure the opposite would be either.
 

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I prefer thinking women
lols, they have emotions too.

I'd like to see anyone get around without emotions. Google "amygdala damage" if you want to know what happens to human functioning without emotions.

~~

Everyone is emotional; look at the enneagram, the whole thing is driven by emotions; fear, envy, anger.

Having emotions does not equate to expressing them. You could be a very emotional person, but you have learned how to deal with them the majority of the time.

I like to be around people with high emotional intelligence, women or otherwise.
 

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lols, they have emotions too.

I'd like to see anyone get around without emotions. Google "amygdala damage" if you want to know what happens to human functioning without emotions.

~~

Everyone is emotional; look at the enneagram, the whole thing is driven by emotions; fear, envy, anger.

Having emotions does not equate to expressing them. You could be a very emotional person, but you have learned how to deal with them the majority of the time.

I like to be around people with high emotional intelligence, women or otherwise.
I know. I just prefer women who make their decisions based on logic.
 

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I need an emotional woman.

I'm peculiar. Most people think I'm not emotional. I don't demonstrate anger in public, incapable of yelling (even on roller coasters I'll just have a big grin) and generally mild mannered all around. Stoic, I guess. In reality, I'm super sensitive but not brave enough to wear my emotions on my sleeve. The reason I need an emotionally intelligent women is to allow myself to be vulnerable with her. It gives me the balance I really need. I'm big dreamer when it comes to romance and I would want her to dream with me too. So yes, I appreciate emotional women.

I have a feeling I just lost all of my NT credentials.
 

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I need an emotional woman.

I'm peculiar. Most people think I'm not emotional. I don't demonstrate anger in public, incapable of yelling (even on roller coasters I'll just have a big grin) and generally mild mannered all around. Stoic, I guess. In reality, I'm super sensitive but not brave enough to wear my emotions on my sleeve. The reason I need an emotionally intelligent women is to allow myself to be vulnerable with her. It gives me the balance I really need. I'm big dreamer when it comes to romance and I would want her to dream with me too. So yes, I appreciate emotional women.

I have a feeling I just lost all of my NT credentials.
Um. Marry me?
 

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I think there's a need for the OP to expound a bit more on what exactly is meant by "emotional" here. I would consider myself an emotional woman in the sense of being a dominant feeler, highly empathetic, and motivated primarily by human values. Having said that, I'm not prone to moodswings or erratic behaviour, and am frequently very logical. It's just that logic is my method, rather than my motivation. I don't know if that makes sense... it does in my head :crazy:

My ideas are primarily spawned by human and interpersonal values, which you could roughly categorise as being "emotional" in nature, but the manner in which I expound and put these ideas into practice is very logical. I'm not "emotional" in the sense of crying at the drop of a hat or losing my temper easily.
 

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I need an emotional woman.

I'm peculiar. Most people think I'm not emotional. I don't demonstrate anger in public, incapable of yelling (even on roller coasters I'll just have a big grin) and generally mild mannered all around. Stoic, I guess. In reality, I'm super sensitive but not brave enough to wear my emotions on my sleeve. The reason I need an emotionally intelligent women is to allow myself to be vulnerable with her. It gives me the balance I really need. I'm big dreamer when it comes to romance and I would want her to dream with me too. So yes, I appreciate emotional women.

I have a feeling I just lost all of my NT credentials.
You just made my day. :happy:

And agree with the other INFJ, one can be emotionally expressive as well as completely logical. they're not mutually exclusive - it's more a willingness to be vulnerable and have sufficient inner strength to risk rejection or ridicule.
 

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I don't know if that's the mark of an emotional woman, or a mentally unstable woman... be careful with your generalizations. Emotions can be very pure, and "emotional" does not necessarily mean "constantly sad or angry".
I agree that the anger and sadness are not the makings of an emotional woman, that's not a place I like to dwell in, yet I do feel things quite deeply. I am not a blubbering mess at all, in fact my girlfriends see me as the independent one who doesn't give any vibe at all of neediness. But I can cry at the drop of a hat over something moving that I see.
 

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I LOVE and PREFER to be with a woman who is emotional.

That said, let me explicate further:

I think there's a need for the OP to expound a bit more on what exactly is meant by "emotional" here. I would consider myself an emotional woman in the sense of being a dominant feeler, highly empathetic, and motivated primarily by human values. Having said that, I'm not prone to moodswings or erratic behaviour, and am frequently very logical. It's just that logic is my method, rather than my motivation. I don't know if that makes sense... it does in my head :crazy:

My ideas are primarily spawned by human and interpersonal values, which you could roughly categorise as being "emotional" in nature, but the manner in which I expound and put these ideas into practice is very logical. I'm not "emotional" in the sense of crying at the drop of a hat or losing my temper easily.
Let me start off by stating that I take emotion to be synonomous with having deep and inherent feelings. These emotions are just part of what makes us human. We can't get away from them, but we can suppress them. And I take these feelings to be any emotion. From one end of the emotional spectrum to the other and not only one specific emotion or some entire category. There are people out there with emotional disorders and may tend to linger on one category or specific feeling, but I take an emotional woman to be someone who can or has experienced most or all of the feelings that she is able to feel.

I'm not saying that emotional disorders aren't worth consideration though. It would be very difficult to be with someone that is, for example, angry all of the time or tends to hover on that end of the emotional spectrum. They would technically be emotional per se, but most people don't choose to be with someone that tends to linger on a certain emotion 24/7 because it would be draining on their own emotions. I think we need that fluctuation in our emotions to remain sane and to get along. Just like the ebb and flow of the ocean there has to be some sort of balance in the emotions.

I will experience her feelings uniquely as they are coming from her, but they are feelings to which I am familiar if I have had them myself at some point in my life. So, there is an unconcious understanding there that I recognize an emotion as being happy because I have experienced it myself. I relate to happiness as a good feeling, so when someone is happy with me, I feel a connection to them and can remember what I feel like when I am happy (and so I queitly smile and are happy with them :} )

I believe that my preference for a woman that is emotional is due to the fact that a woman (or any person) that is emotional is in tune with their feelings and is not afraid to let them show. That may sound somewhat cliche, but the point is that someone who is willing to be emotional with me isn't afraid to let me into their heart or into their life. Someone that is willing to share their emotions is also willing to connect with me or anyone else out there. So, in other words, an emotional woman is someone that I can connect with on an emotional level as well because I share these same feelings as an emotional man. (Perhaps this has a lot to do with being an NF and having preferences that others may not. We are all different, but this is what I prefer.)

Even though I am an introvert, I crave human interaction on the personal level. I would rather have a conversation with someone about the ups and downs of their lives rather than mundane chit chat about who won the latest football game and why (perhaps that is just persoanl interest). Lets talk about what makes you happy. Lets talk about what angers you. Lets talk about those deep feelings you have that make you feel alive or make you feel like life can't go on. Lets talk about you and lets talk about me. Some men are not willing to talk because they don't want to be emotional. I do for good or for bad. It's part of me trying to experience all that I can on the spectrum of human emotion. Lets connect because lets just face the fact that we all need interation with other people whether that be good or bad.

Just as men there is a line between being emotional and being unstable and irrationally emotional. I appreciate emotional women sure as long as they are healthy with their emotions. I appreciate people regardless if they are emotional or unemotional though. I think there is much less of astigmatism against emotional women because, society in its "infinite" knowledge says women are emotional and men aren't and that is the way its suppose to be. I feel like a discussion about whether unemotional/cold women are appreciated would be interesting.

The friendship I have with emotional women and non-emotional is different for sure. I like all of them are people sure. One in particular is very emotional and she is sometimes difficult to deal with be she leans towards the unstable emotional category. Personally I wouldn't want to be with an overly emotional woman nor would I want to be with a cold towel for a woman either.
Gender is a big issue these days. I think there is a lot of role assigning given to men, women, heterosexuals, homosexuals, etc...that just cannot be generalized like they are. There has always been this notion that there are feminine emotions and activities as well as there are masquline emotions and activities. For example, I looove to watch movies, and I will even share that I love romantic dramas because there are so many wonderful stories out there for me to wrap my brain around. At the same time, I looove the outdoors. I love to fish and hunt. Some may see the preference for romantic movies to be a feminine trait while others see the preference for the great outdoors to be a masquline trait, yet there are both men and women who enjoy both.

There are men out there (like me) who aren't afraid to show their emotions. This doesn't mean that I cry every single time I see the sunset, but it means that when I feel a certain way, whether that be sad, angry, romantic, or extatic, I let the emotions run free (but not to the point that I lose contr l of them completely in improper situations).It's part of life. It's part of being alive and human. We have all been placed into our roles upon birth and are expected to act a certain way, but I don't think this is right and I'm sure niether do any of you. We are just human and emotion is a very human trait.

In other words, society says men are tough and women are soft, yet when one of them defies that norm by taking on the opposite of their norm, they are viewed as being different, bold, or daring. Why can't we all just be human? Why must there be defined roles for us to adhere to? We may have different sex organs, but do we really have different feelings? Aren't feelings just a characteristic of being human? And aren't both men and women human? So, we have feelings. We have emotions. Why try to hide them if it is part of our nature?

Nope. Emotional people make decisions based off of said emotions, half the time it's sweet, the other half it's just irrational and irrationality is annoying as fuck.

Every guy I've dated has LOVED the fact that I wasn't some emotion-driven twat.
Some people are driven by feelings and some are driven by logic. Is that not why the theory of personality types exists? Is that not why we all have different preferences in life?

I would not prefer a woman driven by logic because that just isn't my fancy as a deep, feeling man. I can relate more to decisions made by heart than by head. Therefore, I can understand an emotional woman more than i could understand a strictly logical woman.

I cannot say that I have dated logical-driven women because I just would not be wholly interested in them to begin with. In the same way that there needs to be a balance in emotion, I think there also needs to be a balance with logic. It is very imporbable that we could make decisions based on logic or emotion alone all of the time. That is why I am trying to explain my feelings about emotional women as logically as I can even though I am not a very logical person.

I am currently reading the book Do What You Are, which discusses personality types in relation to what a person should do in life. One idea that lingers in my mind in regards to how our personality strengths and weaknesses devlop is that at a certain age, our personalities tend to even out. We all have certain strengths like logic or feeling, but as we get older we start to inadvertantly develop those other parts of our personality. It is a very interesting idea that I am exploring through this book. I highly recommend it based on what I've read thus far.

To summarize my thoughts:
-I believe that emotions include all of the feelings on the spectrum of human emotion.
-I prefer emotional women because I can relate and connect with them easier as an emotional man who makes decisions based on how I feel.
-I think society has placed gender norms on us that we follow blindly from birth but are able to defy.
-Some people prefer woman who make decisions based on logic and others prefer woman who make decisions based on feelings.
-We all have different personality types, so this is a reason for our difference in preference in a woman or a man.
-There must be a balance in logic and feelings to avoid the extremes of each because it is improbable that we could make decisions based on one or the other all of the time.
-I am ruled by my heart, but I am also developing in logic as I get older.

So, all of that said, to all of you emotional women out there that prefer emotional men, lets talk! :wink:
 
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