Sometimes. But I also realized that it is my emotions leading me on in life. To my own fault, I follow them wherever they go. At times, I wish I could just do things without worrying about how I feel. When I try to make a decision, I feel a swelling joy in my chest which means the decision should be right and when it is the wrong decision, theres this sinking feeling in my chest telling me not to do something. So, i guess my feelings are almost physical. It would be easier to not follow my own emotions, but if I didn't listen to them, I wouldn't be living my life.

Where I am supposed to be is here. I try not to think too much of what could have been and focus on what is.

I can relate..*goes to venting thread*

izzie said:

Does anyone else feel like if it had not been for your emotions (the side of his or her emotions he/she feels to be overly complex and a bit/more stifling), you would've gotten to where you're supposed to be in your life?

I had felt that if it hadn't been for my internal struggles of self doubt due to excessive paranoia triggered by the past, my personal life would've been much more stable today.

I keep talking about courage, because I keep wishing for more of it to manifest into my being.

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They're part of me. How can that ever be different?

And if anything has held me back in the conventional sense of the word its my ADD, no my emotions. Plus I don't have the feeling of being anywhere else than I should have been.

I don't feel like I never got to where I should have been. I just feel that I'm about 5 years behind. So where I am now I should have been 5 years ago. It has really nothing to do with emotion that's keeping me a what I feel is a snail's pace. I just have a hard time staying focused on anything for longer than 4 years. I grow bored and try to find some new skill or some new endeavor so I never really get great at anything.

That's fine when I was younger, but now I'm 40. To be an expert at anything it takes 10,000 hours (roughly 6-10 years). I think I would have been much further if I could have found that one thing to be great at sooner.