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Discussion Starter #1
My mum is ENFJ and I think she struggles with spending time alone. I can tell when she is in the house by herself when on the telephone as her tone is always a bit sad. Is this common to most ENFJs? I love spending time alone so never really noticed this before but I'm wondering if she maybe needs more company....
 

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That's absolutely an ENFJ thing, yes. Even though I'm an ENXJ, I still have that - I NEED to at least have the option to contact someone at all times. For instance, when I'm on the computer, I'm always logged into MSN messenger and Facebook, and feel isolated & even sad if none of my contacts are on. For in-person contact, I'm sad that college is out right now, as I crave that social contact. I do enjoy being alone, but only by choice rather than a lack of people around to spend time with.
 
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That's absolutely an ENFJ thing, yes. Even though I'm an ENXJ, I still have that - I NEED to at least have the option to contact someone at all times. For instance, when I'm on the computer, I'm always logged into MSN messenger and Facebook, and feel isolated & even sad if none of my contacts are on. For in-person contact, I'm sad that college is out right now, as I crave that social contact. I do enjoy being alone, but only by choice rather than a lack of people around to spend time with.
Thanks I think that's an important distinction. My step dad is always out working at the moment perhaps she is feeling that she doesn't have many options for company. I love being alone, when a night out gets cancelled I'm like brilliant I can watch some DVDs/ read a book. Think I will give her a call/ visit more often :happy:
 

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Thanks I think that's an important distinction. My step dad is always out working at the moment perhaps she is feeling that she doesn't have many options for company. I love being alone, when a night out gets cancelled I'm like brilliant I can watch some DVDs/ read a book. Think I will give her a call/ visit more often :happy:
You're welcome =). Yes, that would be agonizing for an ENFJ - especially one who has a heavy base in his or her family (which is usually a tendency of ours'). Just make sure that she's not an unhealthy ENFJ...they can be inappropriately clingy & thus exude toxic emotions, which often creates a toxic relationship which many people can feel trapped in.

=). Your Mom is lucky to have you as a daughter.
 
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You're welcome =). Yes, that would be agonizing for an ENFJ - especially one who has a heavy base in his or her family (which is usually a tendency of ours'). Just make sure that she's not an unhealthy ENFJ...they can be inappropriately clingy & thus exude toxic emotions, which often creates a toxic relationship which many people can feel trapped in.

=). Your Mom is lucky to have you as a daughter.

Thanks very much :wink:
 

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Hey! I just wanted to reply quickly and tell you that I am the same way as your mom. I am an ENFJ and have virtually NO need whatsoever for alone time. I mean, maybe on the toilet or in the shower lol, seriously! I mean, honestly, I wouldn't even mind if someone wanted to sit in the bathroom and chat with me while I am in the shower! I am a SAHM and my sweet husband is an ISTJ, we are SO opposite, and we are realizing lately that I am really struggling with depression from so much alone time when he is at work and such.

He came home last night(he works late so is up much later than i am) and I tried to make him come with me to brush my teeth! Lol.. just for the company. I may be extreme (i know I am) but I LOVE being with people. I really thrive on it and am energized by being around people.

So, I think it is great that you are going to make an effort to reach out to your mom! You may even want to encourage her to do some volunteer work or something while her husband is away if that is an option. Its what I am planning to do a few hours a week just to maintain my sanity! Hope that helps you a little as well!

:laughing:
 

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I enjoy some time alone, but too much time spent alone, with no verbal input, makes me anxious, lonely, and depressed; my battery runs dry. I have found myself on occasion talking to myself just to hear a voice, and verbalizing thoughts always helps the logic process for me.

Since my extravert isnt dominant, but I am an extravert, I find using a voice over net download like ventrilo or teamspeak alleviates a lot of pressure for me. I can control the amount of people I have to interract with and yet get my fix.

Forums are nice but I like voices; I need the connection of humanity.
 

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My ENFJ sister is either w/ friends or talking w/ friends on AIM. When she's alone (i.e. just her boring ol' family about, no friends) she likes to complain about how she doesn't understand her friends :laughing:
 
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