[hazzle92]

Just wondering how you guys get along with ENFJs? What similarities do you notice? What differences are there? etc.

EDIT: Why has the title gone lower-case?! This is not good for my perfectionism...

 

[vel]

ENFJs - are usually much more relationship focused than me, their friends seems to be very important to them, they like talking about people and relationships in general, dislike the boundaries that INFJs can put up and our need to be alone separate from them at times, usually your better developed Ni will see a plan or strategy first and it is pretty easy to explain it to them because they think very similarly to us, i think they tend to be more judgemental about people or at least they voice their judgement more often - i usually get along with them fine except when they want to socialize and I don't

One problem I have noticed is that some ENFJs are apparently very easily swayed by their desire to please everybody. I know one male ENFJ and we understand each other quite well, albeit with some delay, but we get there. We talk he agrees with me. Then he talks to the ESTJ and agrees with ESTJ, whose opinion is of course the opposite of mine. Then he talks to the ISFJ and agrees with her also.This is just so frustrating to deal with because he switches sides several times a week to try to appease everybody. So I never know where he himself stands and if he hasn't switched his mind again. ESTJ usually gets the better of him by just kind of demanding for his way and also being extraverts they talk more together. So I kind of just gave up on working with this guy now and am planning to try to get to the ESTJ now. He is stubborn but at least I always know where he stands.

 

[psycho]

a post I've written recently on the same topic in ENFJ forum

" I've been living with an ENFJ for more than 20 years and we've got 3 children.

What we share is high values of loyalty and honesty.
We both can't stand injustice.
We are both extremely sensitive to critiscism and discord.
We both like discovering new cultures, countries, civilizations ...

The main differences :
- she has exceptionnally good people skills ; 90% of our friends came from her intial acquaintance
- she gets personnel statisfaction from helping friends or fellows ; I'm rather on a therical world idealism ; needless to say she's much more efficient
- but she's sometimes naïve with people ; she trusts too much and can't see as easyly and quickly as I can their real personality ; when deceived, she's spiteful for life !
- she can't stay alone or even do something alone ; the act of doing "together" is much more important than the result
- she is much more pragmatic than me. I'm a little bit "head in the clouds" but her feet are on the ground
- she likes novels and fiction ; I'm rather essay (history, archeology, ethnology, etc ...)
....

Of course, it's our story and it would be hazardous to generalize. But for us, it works well. And sorry for my poor english - I'm a french guy."

 

[DasPhillipBrau]

well I was misstyped as ENFJ...I dont know any ENFJ in real life, most of my friends are ES/N TP or ENFP

 

[scrybaby]

From my experience really well.