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What is your gift-giving style? Also, what kinds of gifts do you like to receive, and how do you tend to react to a gift that you like versus one that you dislike?

I am doing this for all the types...eventually...

Anyway, I have a few thoughts on the ENFJ based on functions, but I am interested in feedback from actual ENFJs. Please add your own thoughts along the way, as my description is certainly not meant to be definitive.

ENFJs are warm, sincere gift-givers, and like to give often, not just on special occasions. They will feel inspired to give something, and will immediately follow through without a second thought. This may overwhelm a frequent recipient who may then feel obliged to give something in return; but the ENFJ does not expect thisand will warmly reassure the recipient who expresses feelings of inadequacy. Will feel deeply hurt if their gift is rejected or unappreciated.
 

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MOTM Feb 2011
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I am not so much a person who buys gifts for people all the time. My gift is my time and acts of service for them.
But when I do this ie. cook for them, I will not be frugal. I will try to put on a generous meal & there is always wine offered. I can't stand it when people scrimp. Once I went to someone's house for dinner and came home hungry and not only that, she served us raspberry cordial! No wine, not even sparkling grape juice! Talk about tight.

Gift receiving:
When someone gives me a gift that I don't like, I will say thank you and try to put a smile on my face, but I fear that sometimes I am transparent at these times, which I feel bad about.

When I get something nice that I like, I am so excited because I don't have high expectations from people. I am so specific in my mind about what I want that I don't expect people to get it right, so when they do I am totally overwhelmed. But again, my love language is quality time and acts of service so these mean more to me than a gift. My husband usually lets me choose what I want.

Though when I was a kid, I was always making cards with loving words in them for my parents, especially my dad :dry: I did love them both equally, honest. I think my love language as a kid was still quality time but I also felt the need to keep telling my parents that I loved them out loud and in cards. Mum read to me some I wrote for my dad recently, and it was amazing how much trouble I went to to be sympathetic to dad and to support him if I knew he needed it. I surprised myself how intuitive I was about his feelings.
 
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I like to be a very personal and unique gift giver. I try to find what bakes the person smile. I usually try to get things that makes them talk for ever!

As for receiving gifts simple. I would rather make a memory or check something off my lifelist than get an object! Videos are good though!
 

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vocalist said:
ENFJs are warm, sincere gift-givers, and like to give often, not just on special occasions. They will feel inspired to give something, and will immediately follow through without a second thought. This may overwhelm a frequent recipient who may then feel obliged to give something in return; but the ENFJ does not expect thisand will warmly reassure the recipient who expresses feelings of inadequacy. Will feel deeply hurt if their gift is rejected or unappreciated.
This is spot on, actually. :) I DO like to give often, especially when it's unexpected. I like giving fun, thoughtful gifts. If I get someone something practical, I'll usually add to the gift and make sure there's something in there that will either make them laugh or bring back a memory/inside joke. I take people's personalities into consideration when gift-giving as well though. For example, my ESTJ mother just confessed to me the other day that the poems I wrote her as a little girl had little effect on her. It was gifts like the memory foam pillow I bought her that she really liked--oh, and cleaning the house. If I had my way, however, I'd give people the gift of letting them see how I view them (usually in a very, very positive light). In other words, I'd probably write them a little love note, emphasizing their unique and endearing qualities. My gifts aren't usually expensive, but they sure are meaningful. I put a LOT of thought into gifts for people. Sometimes I think of an idea for a friend's birthday gift six months or so before their actual birthday. I then work on the gift until that day (it could be anything from a video of mutual friends saying "happy birthday" to decorating their bathroom and writing sweet little nothings on the mirrors to throwing them a massive surprise party).

I'd like to note that I admire when people don't feel obligated to give a gift in return. It shows that social norms don't rule their lives. Also, I'm then free to keep on giving, which is what I love to do!

I don't expect people to give me gifts, as I'm sure it'd be hard to think of one for me. I'm grateful for whatever I get though. Money, however, is my least favorite gift. It's OK, but I prefer gifts from the heart. Pretty much anything given with a little bit of thought would do. :tongue:
 

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"
I am not so much a person who buys gifts for people all the time. My gift is my time and acts of service for them.
But when I do this ie. cook for them, I will not be frugal. I will try to put on a generous meal & there is always wine offered.."
Kiwigrl


You and I are very similar :) I will find out what they like to eat, plan 3 other side courses, perfect the arrangement with the right seasonal desert, and wine to accompany the lot. I don't give "gifts" per-se. I preffer face time where I can listen, ask questions, observe, encourage intimate conversation, and really get a ~feel~ for the people I am with.

When people give me a gift in leu of face time...I feel insulted. I do not need stuff. I need quality time :)
 

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You and I are very similar :) I will find out what they like to eat, plan 3 other side courses, perfect the arrangement with the right seasonal desert, and wine to accompany the lot. I don't give "gifts" per-se. I preffer face time where I can listen, ask questions, observe, encourage intimate conversation, and really get a ~feel~ for the people I am with.
Yeah I will think about the menu from when I invite them until the night of the meal, because I love to entertain and make them feel special. I am known for my desserts & baking.

Once I heard a speaker say "When you have people over for dinner, put on a big spread, don't scrimp. It's not that you do it to encourage gluttony but you are showing them that they are an important guest in your home."
I like that. Respect.
 
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